Helen Clark "She's Toast" for sale - TradeMe.co.nz

is the toast ok to eat? fast4ya925 (71

) 12:22 am, Wed 29 Oct

I wouldn't advise eating Helen 12:29 am, Wed 29 Oct

Is it made from Organic Bread, that is will the Greens approve of it? brerrabbit (64

) 6:41 am, Wed 29 Oct

Bread should be the least of the greens problems. Don't know how they would go with the carbon emissions we had when making it. Pretty sure that would have cost us a few credits. 10:58 pm, Wed 29 Oct

Hi there - can someone please call me re this. I'm cheif reporter of Newstalk ZB in chch and would love to interview you asap - 363 3555. Cheers Jo jopalmer (101

) 9:15 am, Fri 31 Oct

Is it laminated to stop the edges curling, or will it eventually fold in and eat itself (god willing)? P.S. Any chance of an interlocking Judith Tizard in the future? krayy (23

) 11:04 am, Fri 31 Oct

We reckon it would take more than laminating to stop Helens edges curling in. 9:52 pm, Fri 31 Oct

Great idea, make one of john Key, the next NZ PM and I will bid on it. Good luck with this auction. skylab6 (105

) 11:14 am, Fri 31 Oct

Trouble is we've just done the toast thing. Could you make do with fruit loops instead? 9:58 pm, Fri 31 Oct

excellent work ;-) lil.spudie (349

) 11:16 am, Fri 31 Oct

Cheers 9:59 pm, Fri 31 Oct

Good on yer guys! raymac23 (96

) 11:32 am, Fri 31 Oct

Cheers, thanks for looking. 9:59 pm, Fri 31 Oct

In view of Helen's dodgey history regarding works of art, is this a signed piece and if so is the signature genuine? Go guys! organix (662

) 11:40 am, Fri 31 Oct

Sorry this isn't signed. But check out the question below if you want an authentic signed picture (from rippo007) 10:04 pm, Fri 31 Oct

Are the carbon credits intact, or has the current government already stolen the carbon credits? bcinnz (38

) 11:53 am, Fri 31 Oct

I guess the production of art work like this was another thing the govt overlooked when adopting the carbon credit system. Can't really blame them though. Who would have thought we would do this. Its about as unlikely as a cow farting. 10:09 pm, Fri 31 Oct

Are you up for an interview on Radio Live about this? txt me on 021 998 949 knightrider9 (1

) 2:15 pm, Fri 31 Oct

thats great well done from a x scoht mickymac (49

) 3:57 pm, Fri 31 Oct

Thanks 10:10 pm, Fri 31 Oct

Well done. Looks great (the artwork, not the subject). Check out http://www.trademe.co.nz/Home-living/Lifestyle/Other/auction-185346845.htm for another laugh. rippo007 (252

) 3:59 pm, Fri 31 Oct

Yea we had a good laugh. Good luck with the auction. 10:03 pm, Fri 31 Oct

it looks like she has just fallen on her face,it might be an omen. well done guys, i love it. robyen (87

) 4:59 pm, Fri 31 Oct

Fallen on her face???? Just remember that this is a non photoshop enhanced reproduction. 10:13 pm, Fri 31 Oct

if i win the auction i will happily pay for it but i want you to smash it into a million pieces with a hammer and feed it to the dogs robyen (87

) 6:42 pm, Fri 31 Oct

Don't think even smashing it into a a million pieces would fool the dogs into eating her. 10:14 pm, Fri 31 Oct

Hi Guys. Can you confirm that this is a TRUE original, is signed by the original artist and carries a signature that can be date verified as to the time it was applied to the art work. Also, are there any replicas that can be used for further fund raising events. Thanks dravid0 (25

) 7:33 pm, Fri 31 Oct

Yep sure. We confirm everything you say above. Just let us know what signature you want. Replicas.... Yep also confirm this is a 1 off. If you miss out on this auction we'll post another identical 1 off (Worked for Helen) 10:21 pm, Fri 31 Oct

Reckon you could get Helen to sign it? jla_2004 (107

) 1:21 pm, Sat 1 Nov

We'll try. 3:49 pm, Sat 1 Nov

Hey guys just wanted to say that it is fricken awesome to see a Venturer unit both interested in Politics and undertaking an imaginative funraising initiative. Well done to all of you and Im sure u will make a decent amount of money from it. (from an ex-venturer) ball.n.twine (2

) 2:04 pm, Sat 1 Nov

Hey! thanks for your support. Today we took it down to a Gerry Brownlee speech. This portrait was so realistic Gerry actually thought she had turned up. We'll load a picture. 3:22 pm, Sat 1 Nov

Seller Comment: Seller added 1 photo 3:24 pm, Sat 1 Nov

Hi, can you please confirm there is no smelly mould (as is in her entire corrupt government soup)? Great work! pomster (85

) 3:31 pm, Sat 1 Nov

LOL - Cheers (No mould on this it's too new. Normally takes a term or 2 before the mold starts) 3:48 pm, Sat 1 Nov

Fair enough. In that case, we assume that this is NOT a Helen Mugabe original signed piece. We all know that repeat art fraud can be a tricky one to wriggle out of (if you've no the police controlled under your wing). :-) pomster (85

) 3:54 pm, Sat 1 Nov

. 5:14 pm, Sat 1 Nov

Hi, It looks like in this reproduction Miss Clark has grown a moustache, it concerns me this version of yours looks nothing like the 30 year old version of Helen I see mounted on billboards up the road by the Waitakere Labour Party. As a serious art collector, can you confirm your version is correct & accurate? Thanks netking (428

) 3:55 pm, Sat 1 Nov

If we had a way of computer enhancing toast they would look the same. Yes we can confirm ours is correct and accurate. Look closely at Helen next time and you'll see the moustache. 6:11 pm, Sat 1 Nov

Gidday, any guarantees on the marmite used to subdue the gnashers on this one ? Does it include the usual hidden hidden hooks cleverly disguised, so it can be easily mounted ? cheers tmg (1568

) 4:12 pm, Sat 1 Nov

lol yea an open mouth smile would have been a bit scary to work with. 8:31 pm, Sat 1 Nov

Good on yer folks. SHows after 100 years scouting hasn't run out of relevance. :-) Skip strings (4

) 5:15 pm, Sat 1 Nov

Thanks 6:07 pm, Sat 1 Nov

Mate I live 205 km away and need this delivered in 96 mins, reckon you could make it ? moraz (117

) 5:43 pm, Sat 1 Nov

Give us the name of Helen's chauffeur and we'll have it to you in 95 min. However if she's needed at a rugby match, she'll be there in 60. 6:06 pm, Sat 1 Nov

In one of the answeres above you say this is a reproduction. I didn't think Helen did reproduction!!! nigndids (21

) 6:53 pm, Sat 1 Nov

Why yes!! your right. Good news for the rest of us aye. 7:23 pm, Sat 1 Nov

From your Group Leader, good luckand glad to see the last of the crumbs and smell of burnt toast from the Scout Hall. Don't let her fall on her face or maybe she already has........ bigballs11 (43

) 8:02 pm, Sat 1 Nov

Hi boss, thanks for putting up with this over the last few months. We probably had a few people thinking our venturer unit just sat around eating toast each week. Aren't you glad we didn't use cow crap. Cheers TG 8:24 pm, Sat 1 Nov

It just gets better! Does ownership require an urgent trip to Melbourne at my expense(I stated this in public)use heaps of NZ's valuable carbon credits on photocopying,airfares etc(Aussie to pay for these?)then ask NZ Govt to credit my carbon acct(sorry MY account) for airfares,travel accomodation,photocopying and then claim them as a tax dedeuction? Or should I lie through my teeth and deny all knowledge like my boss, until I get caught out? My tax accountant can't help me. Can you? dravid0 (25

) 9:03 pm, Sat 1 Nov

no 9:27 pm, Sat 1 Nov

Sorry. Forgot to ask. My urgent trip to Aussie turned up NOTHING(zip,nana zero) and this is the reason why my tax accountant is having so much difficulty at present.He is also having difficulty in deciding where he should claim the loss of carbon credits as I am not CURRENTLY an Australian tax resident. All advice gratefully received. dravid0 (25

) 9:20 pm, Sat 1 Nov

Ummm... 9:35 pm, Sat 1 Nov

Toast looks over-done...like her reign. russ6 (760

) 9:52 pm, Sat 1 Nov

. 10:46 pm, Sat 1 Nov

the way the comments are going so far i wouldnt be surprised if helen pays you ten grand to take the auction off trademe. no doubt the money would come from us taxpayers, great auction guys go for it robyen (87

) 7:49 am, Sun 2 Nov

Cheers and thanks for your bids earlier on. 9:47 am, Sun 2 Nov

JamesNZ must be keen on becoming a communist or simply is lacking the cognitive range to understand what's going on. With 3 more years under clark he'll be wishing for the days to return for when he'll be able to afford bread/toast. pomster (85

) 8:12 am, Sun 2 Nov

Cheers. For those of you wondering about what this relates to, TM must have removed jamenz's question because of the language used. 9:52 am, Sun 2 Nov

This is showing what our future up and comings can produce. Awesome work. Lets hope she is toast, so you guys don't join the thousands of GOOD people that have gone to oz to show their skills there. wayneshazza (413

) 8:23 am, Sun 2 Nov

Thanks 9:55 am, Sun 2 Nov

Jamenz - you numpty- well done to the kids who thought this up - what a great fund raising idea. jr1255 (67

) 8:31 am, Sun 2 Nov

Hey thanks for your support! jamenz comments above were removed by TM. 9:54 am, Sun 2 Nov

Is that toast "entrenched"? Can the Maoris clame them under the Treaty of Waitangi? Looks burnt to me - hope you paid your carbon tax? Hope the kids who burnt the toast didn't get smacked for it! Bet those kids holding the toast have broken a few laws, RMA, Traffic, terrorism. Gerry Brownlee would probably pass on the toast but he sure looks like he ate all the pies! andy20020 (240

) 8:31 pm, Sun 2 Nov

. 11:19 pm, Sun 2 Nov

Perhaps our great leaderine should make a bid, then whatever the election result she will at least have a crumb of comfort? aucklandbagpuss (370

) 9:55 am, Mon 3 Nov

Or she could pay us to remove it. Cheers. 9:08 pm, Mon 3 Nov

I've got another use in mind for the toast. Is the mo-mite on just one side? And how rough would you say the toast is? Lastly is it sandwich sliced (ie 1 ply) or toast sliced (ie 2 ply)? carlaf (544

) 10:54 am, Mon 3 Nov

Hi, toasted 1 side, about 80 grit and toast sliced. Let us know what your use is. Cheers 9:12 pm, Mon 3 Nov

Good luck with your auction. Maybe you should have stood on the footpath for photo 5 check out the National poster on the fence. whitt49 (37

) 11:03 am, Mon 3 Nov

You're right. Didn't even notice the poster. More worried about Gerry sampling a few bits of our toast. Note the distance we're standing away from him. Thanks. 9:16 pm, Mon 3 Nov

did the morbidly obese man in one of the pictures nibble at any of it? i'd hate to buy a half eaten product due to greed dirty_dalejr (47

) 11:25 am, Mon 3 Nov

Can confirm he didn't nibble any of it. Any attempt at nibbling we would have walked away and left him sprinting after us. In any case the picture developed some self protecting powers against being eaten as we developed it. As proof of this even birds that normally like bread fly in the other direction when they see it. 9:21 pm, Mon 3 Nov

Kinda ironic. Once this is sold, all that will remain are crumbs. Just like what National will be left with after Helen's disastrous spending spree. Well done lads! finn68 (16

) 2:46 pm, Mon 3 Nov

Cheers 9:21 pm, Mon 3 Nov

fantastic work, your brilliant! she looks so real! hope on Saturday that she will be toast! Well done keep up the good work! sloppyflps (24

) 4:53 pm, Mon 3 Nov

Thanks for the support. Cheers. 9:22 pm, Mon 3 Nov

Haha this is so sweet. I love that she's embracing Movember. Well done guys snrj11 (173

) 5:44 pm, Mon 3 Nov

lol, Cheers. 9:40 pm, Mon 3 Nov

in the picture helen has a very glum look on her face,i guess its because she knows that to govern again after the election she is going to have to get into bed with winston and she may get shafted robyen (87

) 6:41 pm, Mon 3 Nov

I think anyone getting into bed with Winston would be glum. Cheers 9:42 pm, Mon 3 Nov

Kiora Just a question on the preparation of the toast. Has it been cooked in a conventional toaster or has it been prepared in the traditional "Ngapuna method" where the bread is browned using red hot vauxhall and holden parts heated over a roaring chipheater? Cheers Bro trade_you1 (66

) 9:17 pm, Mon 3 Nov

We were thinking of using the "Ngapuna method" but couldn't source a good supply of parts, down here in the South Island. (Especially the Vauxhall parts). Think this crazy guy in Rotorua called Keith has cornered the market (especially in the valued rear axles). Later Bro. 9:37 pm, Mon 3 Nov

Does this toast contain any genetically modified corn products? frogamic (159

) 9:44 pm, Mon 3 Nov

Sorry it doesn't. We couldn't find any. 8:01 am, Tue 4 Nov

As this is a portrait of Labour Party Supreme Commander Helen Clark, can you provide some assurance that the toast that was toasted was in complete compliance with the Electoral Finance Act? lakedaemonian (183

) 10:24 pm, Mon 3 Nov

Yes we can assure you 300% that it was toasted in complete compliance with the Electoral Finance Act. As history has shown a 100% assurance can be proven incorrect but a 300% assurance means you can be pretty well assured we won't be found out if we're wrong. 8:07 am, Tue 4 Nov

It looks as if the picture is superimposed onto the toast. True toast art would use pieces of different shades to obtain a sort of mosaic effect. I'm sorry but your effort looks like a fake. microbe (11

) 11:57 pm, Mon 3 Nov

You're correct about the mosaic effect being true toast art. This is what we were originally intending to do but to keep the definition and resolution if the picture it would have ended up about 5 meters long and used approx 2500 pieces of toast (around 147 loaves of bread). We thought that this would be a bit difficult to handle and transport. So we ended up with what we've got. Each pixel is approx 16mm. In fact doing this was quite difficult. This is our 3rd attempt. Thanks for your comments 8:17 am, Tue 4 Nov

You guy's are awsum. Good luck with the fund raising :) Made my day this did rainbowgirl_66 (61

) 12:04 am, Tue 4 Nov

Cheers, thanks for looking. 8:17 am, Tue 4 Nov

Is there any chance of a photographic replica we could purchase to burn on Saturday in celebration of casting our votes and finally ousting her? And could you do Winston Peters? fallenredninja (65

) 1:50 pm, Tue 4 Nov

There should be a few photographic replicas in the news papers that you could burn. Winston might be a bit more difficult. Don't think we have enough carbon credits left. 11:27 pm, Tue 4 Nov

Where is the authorisation statement required by the Electoral Finance Act 2007? grashan (77

) 3:32 pm, Tue 4 Nov

Oops... think someone left it in Aussie. 11:18 pm, Tue 4 Nov

I hope the winning bidder starts an auction for the video of them eating Auntie Helen after the election. Is it true Winston offered you guys $200k for it with proceeds going to a 'charity of his choice'? cob427 (28

) 3:33 pm, Tue 4 Nov

$200k!!!!. He only offered us 20c. Where's the rest gone? 11:39 pm, Tue 4 Nov

Do you realise that your Scout Group is breaching the Scout Association POR by getting involved in politics? I suggest that you remove this auction real quick. trade4us2 (19

) 6:09 pm, Tue 4 Nov

Hi, thanks for your concerns. The intent of this auction is to raise funds as opposed to politics. I think that most people can see this and generally support what we are doing. Your comment has been the only one to date that has asked us to remove the auction. By mentioning the Scout Association POR I am assuming you are familiar with it and Scouting. If I am correct I find your reaction disappointing. We'll look into it and take steps as necessary. Cheers Tony. 8:27 am, Thu 6 Nov

hahahaha one word for this auction, "excellent" what a clever bunch you are, good luck pomegal (372

) 6:54 pm, Tue 4 Nov

Hi, Thanks for that. 10:55 pm, Tue 4 Nov

She will kick ar''se at election time ..... then you can eat that stale toast. ramjets (110

) 7:59 pm, Tue 4 Nov

No.... we just rename it "A Toast to Helen" and relist. Cheers 10:58 pm, Tue 4 Nov

Another one bites the crust. another one bites the crust hay Helen going to get you through another one bites the crust. Well done guys you have shown me the faith is still there for the scouts of this world kiwikid1 (690

) 8:01 pm, Tue 4 Nov

Hey Freddy, thought you'd left us. Had a laugh over this one. Thanks for the positive feedback. Cheers 11:02 pm, Tue 4 Nov

At last we have a news item about the election that is relevant, accurate, original and news worthy. Congratulations Venturers. Scouting is alive and well. Where can we send a financial appreciation? illogan (598

) 10:39 pm, Tue 4 Nov

Hi, thanks a lot for the feedback. If you're serious about the financial appreciation I'm sure the Avonhead Scout group would gladly accept it. Alternatively just contact a local scout group in your area and donate it to them. After all we're all connected through a common bond. Cheers. 11:13 pm, Tue 4 Nov

Just checking, has this toast been produced by the sons of retarded right wing shallow "money is God" type people who are trying to make a political comment on an online auction site before a national election within one week? mlawry (89

) 10:42 pm, Tue 4 Nov

Just confirming: No. 11:22 pm, Tue 4 Nov

This image of Helen is so lifelike that its scary! Shame you cant see her lovely Brown Teeth!! 3kingdoms (150

) 11:07 pm, Tue 4 Nov

Good point. If we had shown the teeth we could have used it to scare trick or treaters away last Friday. 11:24 pm, Tue 4 Nov

Christchurch aye, the white right captial of NZ. Heard you don't like those Obama types down that way? How about you do one of Key and English and stick them together with some sort of dubious material and I'll give you $5 for it? mlawry (89

) 11:16 pm, Tue 4 Nov

If I took the toast into the mountains would the Keas eat it? adne (0

) 11:31 pm, Tue 4 Nov

Thats a stupid question. Everyone knows Keas only eat rubber from Japanese vehicles. 11:43 pm, Tue 4 Nov

Now THIS isn't about John 8-/ or John (-8 ... 8-D .. I reckon you are guys are secret Helen Supporters cos theoretically you really should have been using old crusty bits not nice lush center bread, please confirm no center bread was harmed during this adventure, signed Winstaine. monstaman (114

) 9:52 am, Wed 5 Nov

No center bread was seriously harmed. In fact we've actually extended its life. But there's not many pieces of other bread, made at the same time as these, still around the place. 8:09 pm, Wed 5 Nov

THIS IS SO FUNNY!!!! Well done Tony, DC told me to look at this and I did and I am so proud of you! Didn't know you were so talented blackjack144 (8

) 6:59 pm, Wed 5 Nov

Helen aint toast. John is. but you are doing this for the money, fair enough... the right wing capitalists are the ones with the money i guess. drsox (16

) 8:11 pm, Wed 5 Nov

I guess as a Venturer unit we only have 2 real options for fund raising. 1. Take handouts in the form of applying for grants or bludging off our parents , or 2. working for it. We took the work option. 9:44 pm, Wed 5 Nov

Can you do one of John McCain with McCain's potato chips? He's been fried. Ah McCain you've been done again! xenathedog (69

) 9:50 pm, Wed 5 Nov

Thats a good one. Hindsight don't you hate it! 11:18 pm, Wed 5 Nov

Seller Comment: In case anyone is wondering, the Avonhead Venturer Unit does not support any political group or political view. It has been brought to our attention that we inadvertently breached a scout rule that states "Members of the Movement in uniform, or acting as representatives of the Association, must not take part in any party political meetings or activities". As such we will be removing the photo of the guys with Helen and Gerry Brownlee in case this is seen as us supporting a political view. 10:14 pm, Wed 5 Nov

Cool, good move boys! Could you also remove the picture of the fat right wing retard as well? mlawry (89

) 11:03 pm, Wed 5 Nov

Done. 8:32 am, Thu 6 Nov

You have WAY too much time on your hands big brother . Well done. SG hqsue2 (82

) 1:48 pm, Thu 6 Nov

she's got some great homer simpson stubble going on, good work ruderger (180

) 6:52 pm, Thu 6 Nov

She sure has. Fits in well with Movember. Cheers 9:04 pm, Thu 6 Nov

Well done guys,I think its great. poppy127 (1288

) 8:58 pm, Thu 6 Nov

Thanks for the feedback. Cheers 9:05 pm, Thu 6 Nov

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Helen Clark "She's Toast"

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