Scary washing machine. No really, its terrifying! for sale - TradeMe.co.nz

lmao,legend!! :) booost1 (13

) 9:17 pm, Mon 8 Jun

I'm glad you thought it was funny, I nearly died man. 9:23 pm, Mon 8 Jun

I nearly died reading about this beast....No one should have to go through what you did that day.I hope the new owner of this machine also owns the 'Back to the future trilogy'.Best of luck finding your iron. skrapn (50

) 4:54 am, Tue 9 Jun

It was a good iron but I doubt it'll last 35,000,000 years, it is just lying in the grass. I've resided to the fact that I'll have to get a new one. 9:51 am, Tue 9 Jun

Why are you even doing the washing? Don't you have a wife? moochiecat (113

) 8:50 am, Tue 9 Jun

Well I DID...I didn't bring that up as I didn't want to put buyers off. I'm afraid it took her too. It's ok though at least she still has the iron. 9:55 am, Tue 9 Jun

Seller Comment: I have decided to generously include a pair of earmuffs and a piece of string with the sale. They are red ones with black details. I suggest keeping them tied on the string in the laundry so people don't nick off with them. Like those awesome pens at the bank. (but is sucks when they run out of ink) Its amazing what you can do with string, I tied strings on my goldfish so when it's time to wash them I can just pull the strings and out they come, no more catching them with the silly net. 10:56 am, Tue 9 Jun

My daughter is having a dance party this weekend---can I borrow it for some background bass noise for them? terryb_1 (31

) 12:43 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Do you hate your daughter and her friends or something? i would never ever inflict this thing's wrath on a family member. No way, not after my loss :( 2:13 pm, Tue 9 Jun

You legend, I laughed so hard....I need to use my washing machine. fluffykiwi (294

) 12:45 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Just be careful, thats all i can say. I don't wear underpants anymore, in case I need to use the washing machine. 2:14 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Is the picture included with the machine? BECAUSE IT'S AWESOME vex (97

) 1:18 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Sure I can include the picture if you want, I can also draw pretty good sharks and the undertaker from WWF wrestling. they always end up looking the same which is frustrating because its hard to tell which one is which when I'm showing my friends. I usually write Shark under the shark one so I don't forget which is which. 2:20 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Just curious, have you explored exorcism? I know a guy who can get you a great 2 for 1 deal. extropy (103

) 1:31 pm, Tue 9 Jun

I watched an exorcism movie once, it was very scary, the worst part was knowing that I'd soon have to use the washing machine again. When I watch scary movies I usually sit on a plastic bag just incase. The last thing i need is to have to wash the couch cushions. Towels were bad enough! 2:24 pm, Tue 9 Jun

does it eat socks too? pnutz (129

) 1:35 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Funny you should say that, I used to enjoy a variety of different coloured socks. I used to wear Move on a Monday, Turquoise on a Tuesday, White on a Wednesday etc etc but the sadistic machine kept taking the left one so I had to buy all black socks. Now its easy i can just use any pair. The left over socks I used to make giant multi-coloured gloves incase I ever get sucked through the portal into Giant ice land. I will used them to appease the cold angry giants and win their affection. 2:29 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Do you have a violently haunted steam press to go with that? http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Mangler trademe11 (21

) 1:40 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Hmmmn that is a frightening discovery you've made there, I hope mine doesn't also uproot it'self and go on a rampage. It quite quiet at the moment. Maybe it's just waiting for me to grow complacent and then it will strike. I don't think so, I'll be ready. 2:32 pm, Tue 9 Jun

I'd love to pay you at least a dollar just for recounting your experiences with your washing machine. If I should start the bidding and win, is it okay if I pay you without actually collecting the machine, earmuffs or string? mr_judkins (115

) 1:51 pm, Tue 9 Jun

I can understand your fear. Maybe I shouldn't have been as descriptive in my accounts but I wouldn't want to let someone use it without taking proper precautions. By all means bid away. If it doesn't get collected I might pimp it instead like the one in my other picture. Or donate it to the school for the deaf. 2:39 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Will this washing machine be scary enough to scare away my. other half's, other half? I've tried the death threats thing, to no avail... cheers! seven_cheeses (110

) 2:12 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Hmmmn, interesting concept. I can see that working. You'd want to get them to wash something really big like a duvet. You could put a jar of marbles and some broken bottles in there first, as soon as they push start run because i don't actually know how big the blast radius would be. hot tip, super glue the plug into the wall. 2:43 pm, Tue 9 Jun

This is the funniest and best auction I have ever seen. It takes a lot to make me LOL but hell, this one did! Good for you! I'd be selling it too if it were mine!! :oD tinzaroo (286

) 2:31 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Thanks I'd feel bad giving it away for nothing to someone because if it happened to swallow up their children or something it would look almost like I gave it to them on purpose. At least if money changes hands then they bought it with their own free will and didn't just accept it to be courteous. I wonder if I need a weapons license to sell this? i better look into it. 2:49 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Dude, you should be either writing comedy or doing stand up. Haven't laughed so much in ages. Cheers for that! liveship (16

) 2:32 pm, Tue 9 Jun

This is serious business I don't know why you're laughing. Reminds me of a joke I heard though... "Why can't Mike Loder do stand-up?" tee hee. 2:52 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Oh this is classic LOL thanks for the laugh!!!!! maybe someone can use it in a washing machine race...it sounds like it may just win or at least scare the other ones away LOL kizmc (1326

) 2:35 pm, Tue 9 Jun

There are washing machine races? Do you have any more information on this? I've been looking for a new hobby for a while. I was into designing "Gangster themed" hot glue guns for the younger generation to enjoy textiles with. I was trying to encourage them to put down the playstation and explore arts and crafts more. I once managed to stuck my two eyebrows together which was weird. 2:59 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Lma0....no thanks on the buying dude....the last appliance I bought spat out a woman and I've been stuck with her ever since......maybe I could get her to do a load of washing at your place then hopefully I'll be freeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! pops31 (79

) 2:43 pm, Tue 9 Jun

How odd, what did she look like? Small?, cute?, brown hair? I wonder if it was... actually no keep her i don't know where she's been now. 3:02 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Had a great laugh, but my cracked ribs are really hurting now!! Seriously, I do have cracked ribs, but this auction has cheered me up for the day. Now for my question...... have you got a DRYER to auction, if so please list. I'm sure your next auction will be just as humouous> You rock!! (mrs) buckyboy (128

) 3:19 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Sorry to hear about your ribs. My friend Nigel had a cracked rib once too. I don't have a dryer sorry. I climbed into mums dryer once as a toddler pretending it was a spaceship and somehow shut the door behind me. I was in there for ages and I got really thirsty. 3:31 pm, Tue 9 Jun

lol m8 seriosly consider a career in comedy.....even ur replys r funny!!!!!!good luck on sale my demon washing machine just died....louder than a airoplane it was, i calld a guy n he asked 'is it noisey' i said 'oh i spose it is' (obviously im used 2 the noise)...because he turned it on and he freeeked out 'not noisey' he said 'f*** u must b deaf ......its f*** bearings gone' call out fee of $50.lol...i didnt think it was that loud.... bethygrl (0

) 4:26 pm, Tue 9 Jun

I know your pain. Before she was consumed by the beast, my wife used to use it to get me out of bed on a Sunday. The first time she did it I was asleep dreaming about my vast airsickness bag collection I have. In my dream suddenly the wall of the plane I was on blew out and people, suitcases and seats were being sucked past me with a huge roar as the plane hurtled to earth. Then I woke up terrified and realised I was just dreaming and it was just the washing machine. Phew! Boy was I relieved.... 5:16 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Well, I don't need a wash-machine but well done! I hope y'all get "LOADS" for it Ho ho! ;0) dartangnan (7940

) 5:33 pm, Tue 9 Jun

That was funny you said "Loads" meaning loads of money but also referring to "Loads" of washing, and this is a washing machine bah ha ha ha thats hilarious because it's a play on words. I'm going to write it down in my notebook so I can tell it to my friend who likes play-on-word jokes. He'll love this one. 5:41 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Mike, my son told me about this auction & I alerted the message board today because it was so funny. This is why you have had so many messages - I hope you don't mind. Thankyou for the entertainment & I hope you do well with your listings. sue1955 (84

) 5:43 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Thanks Sue, you're great. I haven't managed to get a lot done today. I was hoping to work on my Icelandic but I keep being interrupted. Cheers. 5:51 pm, Tue 9 Jun

No worries! Take it! It's a gift to you! Make it your'e own! And here I was thinking I was all "WASHED" up as a funny-woman! You certainly put the "SUDS" on that one! Well mate, keep your "POWDER" dry! And once again good luck! dartangnan (7940

) 5:48 pm, Tue 9 Jun

You're unbelievable! I've written those ones down too, man Simon's going to crack up when I tell them to him. 5:53 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Seller Comment: Seller added 1 photo 5:56 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Seller Comment: I've added a pic of the earmuffs and string. It's not really string, more of a twine or cord. Its quite strong I've used it for all sorts of things and it's never let me down. This is not the right string to use if you are considering my goldfish trick, it's too thick and really hard to tie their little tails. But it will be perfect for tying the earmuffs into the laundry, it should also be strong enough to supply a link to this world if you get sucked through the portal but I wont guaranty it 6:00 pm, Tue 9 Jun

This is really quite remarkable, though id be lying if it was a 1st for me.. lets just say that I am SO glad washing machines cant reproduce. If your washing machine and my washing machine got together I can only imagine what sort of horror theyd create... *shudder* anna4life (37

) 6:01 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Maybe my washing machine is just looking for love? Maybe if my washing machine got together with your washing machine all their superpowers would be eliminated and they could live in peace....... Like on that Hancock movie with Will Smith. That movie was awesome i watched it twice in one day. 6:10 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Seller Comment: Im off to go see Terminator Salvation now, I think it will be good for giving me some hot tips on survival against renegade machines. 6:12 pm, Tue 9 Jun

I truley must show some concern for your dear gold fish. I hope these "strings" are attached to the appropriate collars or harness, especially while out exercising........they could otherwise be a danger to small children, dogs and mice molly111911 (302

) 6:19 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Exercising goldfish, are you mad? If they get a bit docile I usually just dip the egg beater in the water for a few mins, it really ups their energy levels. I have to really be careful not to tangle the strings though. R.I.P Sammy. Though I must admit the harnesses are a good idea, you may be on to something there. 9:43 pm, Tue 9 Jun

This literally made my day. I almost peed my pants. Wish would possibly be a life or death situation for you right? If you ever want to sell anything else, I'll pay you just to write stuff like you did. Say hi to the dinosaurs bucda397 (29

) 6:32 pm, Tue 9 Jun

To be honest if I peed my pants now I'd probably just throw them away. Either that or sneak them into my flatmate's washing basket, mooo ha ha. 9:45 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Laughed so much I burnt the dinner!! LOL Thank You!! mizp (913

) 6:42 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Oh no, please don't tell me your oven is possessed too! Why would you thank me for burning your dinner by association? I'd be real mad. I once burnt my finger while picking Sammy out of the toaster. I had to write a note on the toaster, 'Do not insert finger while on' and then i drew an awesome skull and cross bones on the side and wrote also wrote Danger because the skull and cross bones was a bit abstract. 9:50 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Thats so funny thank you, thats has made my day :):):):):) iddy1 (666

) 6:55 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Do you always laugh at other people's misfortune? I do to its one of the highest forms of wit. Its usually funny because it's not me but this time it is me so I don't really know what to do. 9:52 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Why are you selling this fine piece? jack_the_lad (1540

) 7:03 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Dude, did you even read it? It nearly killed me! hanging on to it would be like going back to the toaster and putting my finger back in despite my two warning signs I installed. 9:54 pm, Tue 9 Jun

YOU ARE THE MAN THAT IS A AWSOME SOUNDING ADVENTURE lol :) nemisis0 (8

) 7:06 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Oh yeah real fun if you like your flatmates finding you clutching the deep freeze shivering in a cold sweat with no pants on. 9:54 pm, Tue 9 Jun

OMG dude you are hilarious. So now your wife has been swallowed are you single.... debbsk (241

) 7:16 pm, Tue 9 Jun

No I believe she's still alive, somewhere out there. We always had a pact that if one day we got separated from each other by some sort of paranormal event I was only allowed to marry Natalie Portman, and only if she got married in her Princess Amidala dress. You know the one. I actually made that bit up she said I could marry her in any old dress, or even pants. To be honest I wouldn't really mind. 9:58 pm, Tue 9 Jun

So, she's not such a "gentle Annie" then!!!! PMSL. lucylocket01 (153

) 7:24 pm, Tue 9 Jun

No way, its a KELVINATOR which is way tougher. Honestly, if you were standing in a whiteware store in 1985 with your epic puff-mullet wearing a square shouldered jacket and stone washed jeans would you choose the "Gentle Annie" or the KELVINATOR. I know what I'd choose. Well that and "Gentle Annie" kind of sounds like "Genital Fanny" which put me off a bit. Ok it put me off a lot. 10:01 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Hi Seller, I am sure you could use the book "How to retrain your anti social washer", by Iva Sledgehammer.. Similiar to Toddler Taming but uses tools like spanners and wrenches and other man gadgets. If that fails, try taking it to The F&P Whiteware Counselling Centre. If all the above fails I am sure it will make a great tardis. LOL. Love your listing details btw. LOL raker (675

) 7:52 pm, Tue 9 Jun

I looked that book up and I cant seem to find anything like it but I did find an excellent book called "How to retrain your Irish Wolfhound" which i found very interesting and I am already up to the 2nd chapter. This parts about caring for their teeth and I'm quite excited about it. 10:04 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Have you considered speaking to the NZ Police, or the Auckland High Court folks? I think this wee beast would find a happy new home in the court room entrance. Or perhaps through reverse engineering jail cells could be retro-fitted with one as standard? I'm sure the dinosaurs would appreciate it as too, as humans rain down like popcorn chicken from the sky. nick431 (19

) 7:58 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Dude you're weird..... 10:04 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Oh really. I tried to watch that movie one day but it was the day before my mother in law came to stay so I absolutely HAD to wash everything that needed washing because I didnt want to introduce her to the monster in my laundry.. After that day I decided to investe in ear plugs. It'sneedless to say I didnt hear a single thing when I tried to watch hancock. anna4life (37

) 8:09 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Hmmn sounds like you need a new washing machine to me. 10:09 pm, Tue 9 Jun

OMG, I think i have it's brother, the next one off the production line. It has been know to wander around the house during spin cycle due to it's unfeasibly long extension cable and once, just once, I swear I saw a glimps of a long lost land with strange beasts roaming it's pastures all wearing mis-matched left socks. chrispops (275

) 8:23 pm, Tue 9 Jun

See I told you, I'm not making this up! If I were you I'd be roping that sucker down, it's one thing to have the portal opening randomly but it's another thing to have it chasing you through the streets. People might think you were weird. 10:11 pm, Tue 9 Jun

GOLD!!! Hope this doesn't do a Linda Blair and head on back. Or even worse *shudder* be like Christine. _trinity_ (110

) 8:23 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Oh I get it, head on back, ha ha it's another play on words, your clever. I didn't know what you were talking about at first but then i got it and I laughed out loud, apparently this is now called LoL'd but that sounds weird, kind of like my eyes when I drink too much beer. 10:13 pm, Tue 9 Jun

lol,this is so funny i may have to bid for it. snakeynzone (2094

) 8:47 pm, Tue 9 Jun

As long as you are aware of the consequences of your actions. 10:14 pm, Tue 9 Jun

brilliant...if matrix was here hed laugh too missbumblebee (171

) 9:07 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Hmmmn, now thats obscure. 10:14 pm, Tue 9 Jun

you heard it people, if your wife has tired of your washing machine with an unbalanced load then this is for her. with the saddle on she will never stop doing laundry in this, the "loudest most violent" washing machine ever. chubz1 (137

) 9:09 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Dude it's for people that like horses, I'm not quite sure what you're hinting at here. 10:15 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Laura is wondering if the black one is included, she really likes the saddle... isn't this our old washing machine? I remember the spin cycle like it was yesterday. Good luck with the auction. P.S you owe us half of what you sell it for. jibbenit (96

) 9:18 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Jock is that you? You're the swine that is to blame for all my heartache and pain. You'll be sorry, you'll be sorry! I intentionally called you a swine. he he I'm not surprised by this, Laura loves horses! 10:17 pm, Tue 9 Jun

lol. love your description and the drawing, did you do that by yourself? good luck with your auction ^_^ benny146 (7673

) 9:25 pm, Tue 9 Jun

I got my friend to help me with the claws, every time I draw claws they look like candy canes and I couldn't exactly portray a fierce dinosaur with candy canes for toes. 10:18 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Wonderful - I hope you either have or get a job writing copy - you'd be very well paid. Thanks for giving me a good laugh elwood0 (143

) 9:30 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Nope I'm an inventor, last week I made a goldfish holder for the mantle-piece but you can only use it for up to ten minutes I've discovered. R.I.P Bubbles. 10:20 pm, Tue 9 Jun

wat a legend, your on facebook bro! blahaha! i really want to grab this nasty little beast but it will cost an arm an leg for postage to sydney kpching (7

) 9:35 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Not technically, I guess if i was to input the correct load, i could potentially open a porthole to Sydney and then at the last minute chuck the washing machine through. But I'd be really taking a risk there. The last thing i want is to end up in Aussie. 10:22 pm, Tue 9 Jun

My mate emailed me the link to this listing...You made my evening! Still laughing...!! Bloody hell! domarno (10

) 9:35 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Why thank-you, it's my pleasure. I just wrote that and its way too boring. Here's a link to a cat with a lemon on its head. http://img98.imageshack.us/img98/6948/lemoncatsized7cb.jpg I look at it when I'm sad and I come right in no time. 10:24 pm, Tue 9 Jun

If i new for certain it would swallow up my wife i would definatly bid on it , ha introduce it to the mother inlaw too, have you ever thought about writting childrens books lol, legend otatara (566

) 9:45 pm, Tue 9 Jun

I did write a children's book once, it was called "Cinderella" and was about a girl who had these real mean sisters and there was a prince and a ball and a glass slipper, it had a really deep plot and I was sure it was going to be a big success. i was saving up for the printing because it was way more than I thought it was going to be then i found out some dork had stolen my manuscript and beat me to it. I was real angry. They changed the ending too. 10:29 pm, Tue 9 Jun

I wish you lived a bit nearer. My daughter doesn't have washing machine and I'd love to buy her this one. She is of "nervous disposition" and I reckon this would keep her in line. She's single so would possibly be a great hit with the cavemen. On second thoughts, perhaps the dinosaurs would be more to her liking, especially the rich ones. It would probably be good for her tin drawers. Perhaps you could give your machine my address & your machine could deliver itself? pat.kake (3008

) 9:59 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Well first I would need your address, I am really good at nose-flute but I'm only up to grade 1 at mind reading. I used to be of "Bold disposition" but after living with this machine my nerves are like a ball of rubber bands. 10:33 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Do you think that it would make a good fairground ride if the right type of harness were used? Just thinking outside the square here. oliversm (14

) 10:03 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Yeah way outside the square buddy. I think OHS would rain down on you like a tonne of bricks. Incidentally a tonne of feathers would be just as heavy as a tonne of bricks which is a thought I have always puzzled over. I still think I'd rather be smothered under a tonne of feathers though, I would rather risk the suffocation than be battered to a pulp by bricks. 10:36 pm, Tue 9 Jun

OK, now you're trippin'!!! Mullets? Dinosaurs? Are we seeing a similarity here? Now what were YOU smoking? Hun, i wouldn't be in a mullet - padded shoulders maybe a la Dynasty, Big Hair and oooh the turquoise eye shadow, but mullet? Nuh-ah. MAYBE if you were a bogun Westie, you'd love a KELVINATOR but then you'd be standing in a black fisherman's rib sweater somewhere on White Swan Road wouldn't you? LOL ... good luck with the auction :) lucylocket01 (153

) 10:08 pm, Tue 9 Jun

That may be so but Gentle Annies' are still inferior. In 1985 I had a bowl cut which mum did for me. It wasn't very straight because my head is not symmetrical like a bowl is. Mum used to cut my hair because the hairdresser refused to. He once said styling my hair was like trying to style a hairbrush. I told him a good tradesman never blames his tools and that he should try harder. He cut my ear. 10:40 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Haha, legend! You remind me of David Thorne... nick_coal (41

) 10:26 pm, Tue 9 Jun

You know David? Ha ha David haven't seem him for ages, not since the awesome party at Matthew's house. That got real out of hand real fast. I gave David some of my black socks to make his ninja gloves out of. They came out really well but we had to colour his fingers black with a vivid as they looked weird all pink and sticky-outy. 10:45 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Is this an WMD,and what about North Korea?Does Kim know of this machines power? justkarl (6

) 10:45 pm, Tue 9 Jun

I guess you could kind of call it a WMD, it is kind of part of the WMD of my house if you consider dirty water waste. Some people prefer to recycle their grey water, but these same people usually smell like onions. I prefer to just say Waste Management Division as acronyms are sometimes confusing. I used to think NASA stood for North And South America, boy was I embarrassed when I found out it actually means North American Saxophone Alliance. 10:57 pm, Tue 9 Jun

who needs acid when u have this beast _alexx_ (5

) 10:49 pm, Tue 9 Jun

I've tried acid, it didn't work. All it did was melt a little bit of the paint off one corner. I got some on my arm, you should have seen me jump, lucky i got it under water pronto. I've seen what acid can do, I watched Robocop. A lot can be learned from Robocop. I learnt tonight at the movies that a T-600 series Terminator's central targetting system is located in the base quartex on the back of their neck. One quick stab with a knife or steel bar and they don't know what hit them. 11:02 pm, Tue 9 Jun

It certainly sounded like it was set to be quite a night. That must have been fiddly with the fingers, I suppose all the spray paint was used up on the legs? nick_coal (41

) 10:49 pm, Tue 9 Jun

I don't use spray paint, ever since I thought it was flyspray and sprayed mums windows and curtains. She banned me for life. 11:04 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Wish I saw this for sale b4 my divorce, could have saved me Thousands. Did you get a life insurance payout on the wife? fouryou (2812

) 10:51 pm, Tue 9 Jun

She's still alive, somewhere, I know she is. So that would be fraudulent. 11:08 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Mike, would you be able to autograph the picture of the Dinosaurs should I win the auction? Thanks, Ben. gigaboy450 (285

) 10:59 pm, Tue 9 Jun

What about if I draw some more dinosaurs on the washing machine for you. i can even draw a shark on the lid if you want. 11:09 pm, Tue 9 Jun

How likely it is for the washing machine to re-open the time portal? In my research on time travel, (i.e. watching the "Back to the Future" trilogy over and over,) I found that I needed a "flux capacitor" to be able to sucessfuly travel through time but unfortunately these haven't been invented yet. I am interested in utilising your washing machine as an alternative to this, however I don't want it if it's only going to devour souls or worse, my laundry. peterseay (2

) 11:03 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Are you the same guy form the time machine auction? Did it not work? Damn it i knew that guy was a phoney. 11:10 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Will you marry me? I'll get rid of the washing machine? bucda397 (29

) 11:22 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Somewhere there is a small female with brown hair hiding from dinosaurs in a cave and she's shaking her little fist at you. Is Danielle some sort of clever cypher code name for Natalie Portman? If it is we should definitely look into it. 11:28 pm, Tue 9 Jun

do you think the twine provided would be sufficient enough to bridge a doorway/portal to allow an expedition by a group of specially trained super soldiers/scientists? i believe that with enough deliberation that there is a valuable profit to be had from a niche market aimed toward paranormal-interdimensional explorers eg Bear Grylls and Christian Bale. I believe given the opportunity, my followers and I can take advantage of your demon washing machine and turn it into a very ambitious project.. teekay4 (203

) 11:25 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Mate you are welcome, while you're in there can you take a look around for my iron? My pants are all wrinkly and it takes ages to iron them using the bottom of the frypan. 11:30 pm, Tue 9 Jun

I've been sitting here, crying with laughter for the past 40 minutes or so reading your auction and all the comments - your answers are genius. I got the link off the TM forum but I've since posted it to facebook - I had to share lol Thank you for the laughs! ahknemet (1144

) 11:34 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Ah so you're partly to blame for me still being up way past my normal bedtime. I had four friends on facebook, but now I only technically have two since Sammy and Bubbles are no longer with us (well Sammy is, the toaster dried him out so I glued a magnet to him and stuck him on the fridge) 11:49 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Yes but I won't wear THAT dress. However, I will look into your washing machine. I live in the South Island though and it doesn't sound like it can fly? I wanted to travel back in time to bring back the chocolate bars Cadbury got rid of bucda397 (29

) 11:36 pm, Tue 9 Jun

South Island? Weird. Are there dinosaurs where you live? Simon and i went on an expedition looking for dinosaurs in the park, we didn't find any dinosaurs but we did find a man in a wooly hat who had cigarettes which smelled like burning ants. I dont think it would work out between us if you liek Cadbury. I'm a Whittaker, Cadbury are the enemy. 11:52 pm, Tue 9 Jun

uncle porn, that is the funniest thing ever! *kinda military* itsmoda (15

) 11:39 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Oh hi Dan. Dan likes pretending to be a soldier but he's too fat for the real army. Thats why we call him "Kinda Military" because he's only kind of military. I made him a medal out of a flattened beer top so he didn't feel too bad. 11:55 pm, Tue 9 Jun

That's a seriously good dinosaur drawing, and that stick-on eye, inspired! Where did you perfect your artistic techniques? girlyoda (240

) 11:44 pm, Tue 9 Jun

I'm mostly self-taught, I won a red certificate once for best vegetable sculpture at the '03 art and crafts expo. I thought my one from '02 was better but some guy from Pukekohe beat me with a sculpture carved from a truely massive potato. There was no way I could compete so I bowed out graciously. 11:58 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Is the rare, exciting, and very complete course texts for Icelandic for Beginners included in the auction, also? I need it to help me better understand the undulating ululations of Uthgar the Brazen. He was Icelandic, right? Anyway, I'd like to speak in tongues with him one day, and I think your portal-entering hell-machine, with twine and muffy peripherals, would really help me wash his socks off. Sorry about your goldfish, by the way. Damned shame. :-( aunty_huia (92

) 11:53 pm, Tue 9 Jun

Halló Petra, Góðan daginn. Hvernig hefur þú það. Its ok about the goldfish, i told them when i bought them that living with me would be dangerous but they were still keen as mustard. At least they died for the progression of science and not from fin rot. I'm very diligent with fin rot prevention above all else. 12:03 am, Wed 10 Jun

I found your link on FACEBOOK of all places! lol, Defanitly had to have a look, I'm very interested in seeing who the NEW buyer will be. lmao you have some interesting skills too :p xblackrosex (184

) 12:08 am, Wed 10 Jun

Thanks, it's good to have lots of different skills. Thats why I try to learn obscure skills in case of dramatic life changing occurrences. I am learning to toe type at the moment incase I accidently dip my hands in liquid nitrogen. I'm learning Icelandic because of the imminent invasion, I will be able to blend in with the Nordics, infiltrating them from within where I will be able to strike when they least expect. Chukka-cha.. thats what i say when i karate chop, its more effective than Hi-Ya. 12:26 am, Wed 10 Jun

Have you tried letting the washing machine swallow itself into the vortex and then no one would have to deal with it? Although you may need to retreat to a safe distance in order to survive the distruction until it disapears... great auction though! ashton_live (8

) 12:19 am, Wed 10 Jun

Its an interesting concept but fundamentally flawed. If the washing machine opens the portal, without it what will close it again? I have to live here long term and I don't think i can sleep at night knowing that a raptor could just wander into the house. take another look at the drawing, would you want that tucking you in at night? Not me no way. How are they supposed to build a tunnel through Waterview if the cement keeps leaking into the Jurrassic period? 12:30 am, Wed 10 Jun

thanks so much for your fish catching skills... now i can have waaaaaaaaay better magnets lpmadnae (7

) 12:21 am, Wed 10 Jun

Yeah, remember to dip them in resin though if you dont have resin you can use toffee, it's ok through summer without the resin but without it once the dampness of winter sets in they will go limp and a little bit whiffy. If using the toaster to try them out be careful not to go poking around in there with the power on. If i had been told the red bits were live I don't think I would have even bought a toaster. 12:33 am, Wed 10 Jun

What's the Icelandic for 'Help! My washing machine is trying to eat me and teleport me to the Mesozoic Era!'? If you are unsure, I think Bjork wrote a song about it once. A collaboration with P. Diddy, perhaps. state_of_flux (5

) 12:21 am, Wed 10 Jun

Help is Hjálp, it's quite similar which makes you feel like they are like us. They arn't. Don't ever trust Icelandic people, once the invasion starts you'll all see. I'd be worried about the whole Mesozoic era thing too, it's kind of a long time period and if people in the future ever go back to look for you they'll potentially be searching for about 180 million years. Which is ages. 12:39 am, Wed 10 Jun

If I win the auction Mike, will you throw in your EJ7 too so I can get it down here to Christchurch? darryn316 (119

) 12:25 am, Wed 10 Jun

Hi Ben, no sorry I'm afraid it wont fit and the car is too big to post. I guess i could cut it up into small A4 sized pieces and put it in envelopes but it would take me ages and I'm way too busy with my latest secret invention. 12:43 am, Wed 10 Jun

You are the funniest dude on the whole of trade me.Um, just one thing though, who told you that you had to wash goldfish? I think somebody has been lying to you. Good that you put the cat picture link on there too. It was a good micro break from your answers, it was mildly amusing in comparison. Unfortunately I didn't have any plastic on the chair. Perhaps you could put a warning in your ad that to that effect? majoba (40

) 12:29 am, Wed 10 Jun

Its the fin rot thing, I've said before I'm very aware of fin rot. Every week I wash the fish in warm water and no-more-tears. They must like it because they seem very relaxed afterwards. 12:45 am, Wed 10 Jun

Mickeyyyyyyyy Don't sell the machine!! I'll never get back home if you sell the machine. Put the biggest heaviest load in it. I suggest one horse cover, an A70 axle, 3 acer hard drives, 5 kapok pillows, one alarm clock and a handfull of carburettor jets, set it to wash and I'll be home in no time. I luuuuuuuuv you. P.S. Shall I bring the iron with me? jensen4 (129

) 12:33 am, Wed 10 Jun

Hmmmn I smell a trickster here. Are you sure you're not Icelandic? Icelandinc people can be very wily and I'm tuned to their sly ways. If you really are my long lost love, tell me what was our 'safe word' then? 12:50 am, Wed 10 Jun

Safe word? SAFE WORD!!!??? You're asking me for our Safe Word, while I'm languishing here with only an iron for company? Amoungst the dinosaurs, raptors, Ben 10 foolatrons, underground targeted obscure machinery dealing with old school death, melodic pink froot loop metal!??? jensen4 (129

) 1:01 am, Wed 10 Jun

Ok you almost had me convinced until you started raving there at the end. You're definitely one of three things. 1. One of those genius people who find it hard to communicate kind of like Rainman or my old 5th form english teacher. 2. Icelandic, or 3. Some sort of new-school art-house poet type of the likes I will never quite understand. 1:10 am, Wed 10 Jun

Damn. Foiled again. Back to the sheep dip, 24 laps to go. jensen4 (129

) 1:18 am, Wed 10 Jun

Yeah much safer. Tie strings on the small sheep so if they get trampled you can pull them out. 9:41 am, Wed 10 Jun

This is rediculous. You really expect me to believe your washing machine has the ability to open up a portal to another world or something? Not to mention your picture of the dinosaurs doesn't look very convincing... My cat could have drawn a more realistic rendition of a dinosaur than that, lemon or no lemon. And as for putting a saddle on a washing machine; that's just rediculous. You'd be better off buying a real horse. This is stupid. blairness (84

) 1:21 am, Wed 10 Jun

Sir I think you will find your cat could not even hold a pen. Cats, like many other mammals lack opposable thumbs. I think the only thing worse at drawing dinosaurs than a cat is maybe a dolphin. I have a hitchiker's thumb, while odd looking, luckily it has had no ill effect on its practicality and has often given me an advantage in competitive peaknuckle. My mum has a green-thumb she grows the best turnips ever. 9:49 am, Wed 10 Jun

I've started feeling sorry for your machine. I think you are cruel to rehome him/her. Obviously he/she is suffering a neurological problem. I have reported you to the Fellowship Under Control of Kindred Infernal Nuclear Gadgets. There is a handbook available entitled Send Help It's Terrible. I did have a copy but it wasn't returned after lending it to a Mr & Mrs Goldfish. pat.kake (3008

) 6:43 am, Wed 10 Jun

Are you one of those people that blames the parents and society every time someone goes crazy and shoots people? No this is definitely a string of events bought on solely by the washing machine. I have provided it with a loving and natural home environment. I even took it on an adventure to the beach once and it talked about it for days afterwards. I'm just tricking, why would I take a washing machine to the beach it would get sand in the gears. 9:58 am, Wed 10 Jun

Hey mate, you have to watch this link http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RzfTJYMiuwc&feature=related. Jimeoin NZ Gala. Watch the end, i think your washing machine is a star now! wildbillz (94

) 8:15 am, Wed 10 Jun

Ah Jimeoin, I'm glad he's still doing the eyebrow gag, when i accidentally hot-glued my eye-brows together I was hopeless at Jimeoin jokes. 10:00 am, Wed 10 Jun

Dude, You have totally made my day as well. Its not like you are having a battle of wits with an unarmed person either. You rock. You should be doing stand up (and sit down) comedy!!!! Ree holdn2getha (12

) 9:16 am, Wed 10 Jun

I'd rather not, who will continue working on my inventions if I'm off galavanting around the countryside. I must do my duty here for the betterment of society and technological advancement. 10:06 am, Wed 10 Jun

Ah man that was the best start to the day I've had in ages! You should sell some of your shark pictures, everyone likes sharks sniffinggeneral (687

) 9:50 am, Wed 10 Jun

I have an irrational fear of man eating sharks. I once fell out of a boat, I was in the water for almost a minute, it was the second most scary moment of my life. 10:08 am, Wed 10 Jun

I haven't laughed so much in my whole life! You're a natural comic. Please, please, please commit your stories to a podcast or a blog online. You're wit and askew observations are fabulous. 'R.I.P Bubbles' Just brilliant! Pity, I don't need a demon possessed multi-dimensional sock-o-phobic washing machine. But someone will! BTW I've sent this link to Campbell Live. He'll love it! treefrog (376

) 10:02 am, Wed 10 Jun

Oh-oh, John Campbell, my arch nemesis, I knew this time would come. He's possibly the best Gaelic Poet there is, we have crossed swords before at StAnza the Scottish Poetry Convention in St Andrews. It was a grueling battle but I lost on a technicality. Despite my brilliant sporran i borrowed from Grandad they still saw through my disguise and i was disqualified in the 3rd round. 10:19 am, Wed 10 Jun

Hmmm the saddle is an interesting touch... There is a bar down here with a manual rodeo bull, im pretty good. I think i would have a fairly good chance of staying on that washer. Did you consider selling it to a rodeo? And whoever it was who said you might aswell buy a real horse is a fool - this is WAY cheaper! cfkiwi06 (3

) 10:25 am, Wed 10 Jun

I tried a mechanical bull in Russell once, I was hopeless but my friend Josh stayed on for ages. They had to turn it off in the end and ask him to get off. He got his $3 back so we bought a Big Mac on the way home and shared it. They are good to share because there is two patties so it's fair. Big Macs are more expensive now because of inflation. 10:30 am, Wed 10 Jun

if i put my flatmates in the laundry at the same time as this washing machine going off do you think it would be mean? benie1 (16

) 10:29 am, Wed 10 Jun

I don't think any person alive would let you put them in the same room as this thing when its on the spin cycle. The bit at the end is so terrifying i can hardly breathe. I think they would definitely fight you and it wouldn't be playful jovial fighting either. The only time I think you could put a person in there against their will would be if they were a quadruple amputee but even then they'd wiggle like mad. I have nothing against amputees by the way, my Dad has a missing finger. 10:36 am, Wed 10 Jun

Does Josh know you are selling this? If only you had two, then Josh and i could have a competition. The loser would have to buy the winner a big mac and not have to share it. cfkiwi06 (3

) 10:35 am, Wed 10 Jun

I don't know if Josh could eat a whole one, he's a Possom and they are mostly vegetarian. He felt really sick after having just half, mind you he was a little dizzy from the 20 minute bull ride. 10:39 am, Wed 10 Jun

I have its brother! or.. sister! Mine was so violent it tripped the power. And then it spun off its bearings and the spinny thing in the middle fell through the bottom of the washing machine. Evil i tell you! EVIL!! shifto (817

) 11:13 am, Wed 10 Jun

Sounds like you should be glad it tripped the power, image what would have happened if it didn't. I think i know why the spindle dropped out of your machine, I think it starter to bring 'absolute matter' through the porthole, even a tiny spec on the top of the spindle could weigh hundreds of tonnes. Lucky the power cut off, it sounds like it got sucked back in. Count your lucky stars, the immense density of the spec could have started an uncontrollable gravitational inward pull. 11:41 am, Wed 10 Jun

If the machine is set to a heavy duty cycle will it drown out loud sex? (We're talking pretty loud) mattpeek (2

) 11:51 am, Wed 10 Jun

He he you said Sex....... Thats a potty word. 11:53 am, Wed 10 Jun

LOL thanks for the entertainment dude, sorry to hear about your wife but ya know how people always ask those awful questions when you lose someone well you could just answer "kelivinator" LOL ok so i'm not quite as funny as u - keep up the good work and i hope you manage to offload that scary thing. mum99 (345

) 11:56 am, Wed 10 Jun

I record all my phone calls incase the Icelandics a re listening. This is the end of a recent transcript of one with my friend Johan I haven't seen for two years - "...So how's the wife these days?", Me - "She's been Kelvinator'd", Johan - "No! Really? How long?" Me - "Hmmm only about 35 million years", Johan - "Dude that sucks", Me - "I know", Johan - "So yeah, it was good catching up" Me- "Yeah" Johan - "Okay I best be going" Me- "Ok bye" 12:12 pm, Wed 10 Jun

So are you going to take her back?? Set some ground rules, or at least grab the iron from her hand!! kittykat888 (23

) 12:02 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I haven't found her yet. If she hasn't been eaten then I guess I'd take her back, she's bound to have some good stories to tell at story night on Thursday. 12:14 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I would like to buy "it" (don't invoke it's name!) but like all evil things it is bound to find it's way back to your place and finish what it has started. Sort of like a cursed mummy hand or a pungent garlic fart. bangbug (18

) 12:02 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I've never understood the fear of cursed mummy hands. After all it's just a hand, no claws, no poison glands, no fangs, all it can do at worst is make rude gestures or wipe its smell on you. I bet a few seconds in the insinkerator would sort a cursed mummy hand out good and proper. 12:18 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I'd like to meet you for coffee. We have lots to talk about and I have a proposition for you... grievos (18

) 12:04 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Are you the smokey man from X-files? Can I have a hot chocolate instead?, coffee makes my hands shake and then I'm useless at surgery. I had a hot chocolate at the airport the other day and I managed to suck a marshmellow up the straw. It was real hard. 12:20 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I'd like to meet you for coffee. We have lots to talk about and I have a proposition for you... grievos (18

) 12:04 pm, Wed 10 Jun

My word you are persistent. Icelandic people often repeat themselves, thats why I'm wary. 12:21 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I too am interested in purchasing your “washing” machine but firstly need to establish its capabilities. I can’t quite make out on your picture but is there a specific vortex button or is rift creation merely a byproduct of the stimulation of the fabric of the spacetime continuum due to the describe intense vibration? Were you using fabric softener at the time? Is the anomaly temporal or trans-dimensional? gooseman. (1464

) 12:06 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I've read a short History of Nearly Everything by Bill Bryson and it has a chapter on Quantum Physics. To be honest I kind of thumbed past that bit, so I dont really follow you at your level. There is a water level button if thats what you mean. I'm curious about the advance button though and how it can somehow leap forward to the grizzly bit at the end. Why would anyone want to get there faster?. There should be a delay button instead. 12:29 pm, Wed 10 Jun

(continued from previous) I am looking at travelling to Albuquerque, New Mexico, USA, around April 4th, 1975 and investing some funds with Mr’s B Gates and P Allen but don’t want to end up in a parallel universe where people wear neck ties on their elbows. gooseman. (1464

) 12:07 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Dude i cant guarantee anything, this things got a mind of it's own and a penchant for dinosaurs. The chances of you ending up in a specific time and date are next to none. If it was possible I would have gone back and stopped washing machines from being invented. But it would have been a one way journey as my washing machine would never have been made. 12:33 pm, Wed 10 Jun

(continued from previous) I have explored other alternatives but lack the ability to generate the 1.21 gigawatts required for temporal excursions. A 240v power supply is more readily available but I may need a socket adaptor in the United States for my return trip. Thanks in advance. Mike. Ps on the off chance, can your appliance travel at 88 miles per hour? gooseman. (1464

) 12:09 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Look I already told you I'm under-qualified for this sort of work. You shoudl talk to my mate Russell. he's an electrician at and icecream factory. He can get free icecreams, the ones with cracked chocolate or a missing stick. 12:34 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Arrr hahahha what an awesome auction! You should start writing for the "Close Up"programme! malady (317

) 12:11 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I don't really trust Paul Henry, there's something not quite right about him.. Mark Sainsbury is fine because he has a beard, bearded people are generally trustworthy. I'm thinking of having a mid-winter xmas party, i wonder if he would be the celebrity Santa? 12:38 pm, Wed 10 Jun

your string trick works on cats to! Terance has to go where ever I want him, he dosn't like it but it's funny extacy (271

) 12:12 pm, Wed 10 Jun

It only works for a day or so, he'll eventually chew through the string. Goldfish are fine because they don't have teeth and it takes ages to suck through a string. I tested it myself beforehand. 12:39 pm, Wed 10 Jun

You are a very fuuny man! jam66 (68

) 12:14 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Do you mean like Funny Ha ha or Funny like my freind Soren? 12:41 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I've been trying to cook a chocolate cake but that damn thing never rises. Any advice? whoisgarydare (10

) 12:15 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Baking soda. Works every time. 12:41 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Love your drawing - how much for that alone? Got any others of your 'travels'? milan82 (85

) 12:20 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Yeah i have heaps, drawing is one of my favourite hobbies. 12:42 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Have you ever thought that your poor washing machine is causing a scene just to get your attention? I think it may be in love with you.. hence the wife stealing. It's a cry for help! rachel-anne (14

) 12:28 pm, Wed 10 Jun

No it's the same for anyone that uses it. I even dressed up as a fireman with a big mustache I made out of cat fur to try and fool it and it was still loud as ever. 12:45 pm, Wed 10 Jun

In all seriousness man, I don't think an iron is going to help your wife now she's stranded in the Triassic period or wherever. Dinosaurs don't have clothes. And even if they did, they probably wouldn't have money to pay her, they'd just bring her heavily gnawed carcasses and, I don't know, giant weird prehistoric nuts or something. betterwithsalt (35

) 12:28 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Yeah but dinosaurs have quite wrinkly skin. 12:47 pm, Wed 10 Jun

My dads does this ur not alone randomswtie (9

) 12:30 pm, Wed 10 Jun

You have two Dads? How does that work? 12:44 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Did you not want to put in a buy now price? harhest (33

) 12:33 pm, Wed 10 Jun

No I was the bidders to be in control of their own fate. I'm staying out of this. 12:47 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Is it possible that this washing machine is so scary it would make Chuck Norris crap his pants? nirvana_bleach (25

) 12:43 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Chuck Norris cant crap his pants, the pants evaporate at the sound of the first squeak. 12:48 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Baking soda! Of course. I use baking soda on stained clothing i chuck in my washer. So far it hasnt opened up any vortexes to Jurassic Park. Maybe that would do the trick. P.S. remember to hide the baking soda wrapped in an article of clothing. You dont want the bastard to see you coming to kill it. Good luck. whoisgarydare (10

) 12:46 pm, Wed 10 Jun

No if I were to kill it I would want to look into it's dials as it died. After all this misery it's caused me it doesn't deserve to painlessly slip away. 12:50 pm, Wed 10 Jun

that made my day! very funny :) i dont need one but i saw the link on facebook and had to check it out , good luck in your auction :) melandboys (76

) 12:47 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Thank you Melandboys, Melandboys sounds like a movie I saw once about breeding. It was pretty boring and lacking in plot. More of a documentary but it wasn't in the documentary section it was in the anatomy section. 12:54 pm, Wed 10 Jun

HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!! TOO FUNNY! You must have almost set a record for questions asked on an auction, where do you get the time to answer them all? Lol! P.s Your a student arent you? :D :D :D shoppergirl06 (29

) 12:55 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I'm struggling believe me, I'm late on my gold fish washing, I left my tooth decay experiment in the solution too long and it melted, now i have to start again. I forgot to go to my nose flute lesson, I haven't had time for toe typing practice and my washing is piling up. 3:29 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Hi, I am curious as I seem to know this machine from somewhere...has it ever done any acting? because I think I have picked it now! it was in Terminator 2 in the future battle scenes wasnt it? Crushing the Human skull if memory serves right, if that the case it should have been at a minimum $2 reserve since it is a famous machine! jadechristy (99

) 12:56 pm, Wed 10 Jun

jkuws drruht dffffffffffuhr djection. I typed that with my toes but i still had socks on so it kind of blurred the words a bit. 3:30 pm, Wed 10 Jun

lmao i had to come in here, i had one exactly the same, can i tell you i have never had a machine that washed as well as it, oh i hope im allowed to do this in here, oh well we will soon find out, they are years old elsy (3

) 12:56 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Do what? In where? I've heard of people talking about themselves in 3rd person, I sometimes find myself doing it, "Mike does not want to do the washing" but I've never before encountered someone who speaks in the 3rd environment. Are you ok in there? 3:32 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Put some up for auction - I'd bid. milan82 (85

) 1:00 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Some what? Anything? I have an almost empty bottle of whiteboard cleaner here, do you want that? Its officemax brand and it smells like potting mix. 3:34 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I am seriously after a cheap washing machine for horse covers but the vortex thing is creeping me out a bit & it might scare the horses in the stables? lillerella (295

) 1:01 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Why would you want to cover up a horse? is a horse cover like a body bag for horses? or is your horse bald and ugly and you are ashamed of it's appearance? It sounds like it might have eczema, best you get some zinc in its diet right away. Covering the horse up is not solving the real problem. 3:38 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Damn your washing machine to hell! I walked past your place the other night, thought I had been struck by lightening, now I know what happened. I don't suppose you have a demon enhanced GHD to straighten my hair? robster66 (83

) 1:02 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Oh no sorry that wasn't the washing machine I was testing my anti-Icelandic tesla coil. It packs a hell of a punch. You must have some Icelandic blood in you, either that or you have recently listened to Bjork. 3:39 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Did the machine mystically suck up your job...BTW my team wants to know what u look like.... Can you post your picture...My team leader would like to know what u are doing tonite hmmmmmm and we have a cougar in our team as well just in case u are young....Cheers sonia676 (0

) 1:03 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I am 'self employed' Inventing is a real job. What would you do if someone had not invented your computer? Or your chair? you'd have to sit on a log or your team members and that would cause all sorts of occupational hazards, especially if you are of 'large disposition'. Cool about the couger that must be exciting and dangerous at the same time. I have a penpal from South Africa who has a Serval named George. Servals are not as big as cougers. 3:51 pm, Wed 10 Jun

You have a gift for telling a great tale! When are you putting out a book?? I have another idea for what could be strapped to this baby but this is a family show! LOL! luvshopping1 (20

) 1:05 pm, Wed 10 Jun

i wont be writing another book, not after the whole Cindarella thing, I'm still pretty bitter. When I rang Charles up to say he'd copied me he changed the date on all the copies to 1697 and said how could he have copied me when it was written before I was born. I got well and truly duped. 3:53 pm, Wed 10 Jun

http://www.facebook.com/pages/Scary-washing-machine/89255828348 Facebook group anyone? sandyd30 (6

) 1:08 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Uh-oh, here we go..... 3:54 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I like the cat with the lemon on its head, possibly the best discovery of the day. Cheers for that :) webtrade (45

) 1:19 pm, Wed 10 Jun

There is one of a cat with a lime on its head too. Looking equally displeased. 3:54 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I am also one of the many that found this link on facebook. And I thought you would be happy to know that your story has made it to Canadia, and everyone here is intrigued by your washing machine. I am curious to why the "horse-lovers" machine looks nothing like the one that you have for sale. Do you unfortunately have 2 of these washing machines? likestolook (15

) 1:25 pm, Wed 10 Jun

The horse lovers model is an example i found when i was doing some research on.....horses. Its not my one, I was using it as an example of what is possible if you are in to customisation. By the way how far from Iceland is Canada, have they invaded you yet? 3:57 pm, Wed 10 Jun

step dad aswell randomswtie (9

) 1:48 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Oh thank heavens for that. I thought you were a product of artificial creation. i was a bit worried as i thought someone had stolen my human gene code notes. 3:58 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Hilarious ... glad to see even evil machines get a chance at a second life. I've have posted it on the website for Good magazine, New Zealand's guide to sustainable living: http://good.net.nz/ vh2 (19

) 1:50 pm, Wed 10 Jun

But this washing machine is very Bad, I don't think they'll like it at Good magazine. Unless they are using it as an example of something that is not very Good. Isn't the term sustainable life a bit silly? All life is sustained, if its ceases to be sustained its stopped. When it's stopped it becomes death. 4:02 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Geeezzz that photo of it is just plain scary now I have read the description.... even unpluged it seems to have a smugness about itself... around the lid is like a square smug smile.....cut the plug off I say... cut the plug offf! steve_newport (221

) 1:53 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I can cut the plug off but the new owner might want a demonstration of it's capability. I hope it doesn't suffer from performance anxiety. 4:03 pm, Wed 10 Jun

1987 in Glendene we caught our flatmate in the laundry pleasuring herself on the out of gear agitator of an old washing machine, possibly a Kelvinator too. Now you say your wife is missing after going near your Kevinator Bemuda Triangle model washer too. The plot thickens. aquila_rosso (3

) 1:55 pm, Wed 10 Jun

My goodness, how rude. The only pleasure this thing has ever given anyone is by turning it off. 4:04 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Could this washing machine be trained to attack on command? james0110 (99

) 1:57 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Its a pretty standard washing machine but anything is possible. I saw on Terminator Salvation that the machines had made radio controlled bulldozers and bucket scrapers so I guess you could do the same thing with the washing machine. 4:06 pm, Wed 10 Jun

You are so so funny!! You remind me of the guy who drew the spiner as payment. If you have not seen his work let me know and I'll forwward it to you! Great writing!! Best of luck with the machine and counselling LOL becworld (0

) 1:57 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Yeah thats Daniel, he's very clever. I was so not expecting the whole missing 8th leg thing at the end, that was a real surprise twist which really added substance to the saga. 4:07 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Great story for a movie you should copyrite it before hollywood gets onto this. You wouldnt want to loose the rights after the whole cinderella episode? A true story is always more captivating to so your definately onto a blockbuster here! jimmy42 (427

) 1:59 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I don't know man, I can see it ending up like that crappy Armageddon movie that ruined Bruce Willis's career. Kind of Armageddon meets Stargate which to be honest isn't really inspiring me. For a man of science like my self I found the lack of scientific accuracy appalling. Unlike Robocop which was awesome. 4:11 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Don't believe him, that image is seriously photoshopped cheapit (21

) 1:59 pm, Wed 10 Jun

We've been through this before. White one real, Black one imaginary. Imaginary is things that exist only in our minds. Like marriage to Natalie Portman and single-handedly defeating the Icelandics (though i am working on both of these, to date they exist only in my mind) 4:13 pm, Wed 10 Jun

... you would make a REALLY good novel writer :) give it a go. re your washing machine.. we had the same problem,.... all it was was we went to the dump and got 4 more springs that hold the drum up... and whala... it goes silent and beautifully... the old ones had seized up. noddybabe1 (299

) 2:06 pm, Wed 10 Jun

You must live in an awesome town, last time I went to the dump to get lawnmower parts they wouldn't get me past the concrete ledge. They frisked me at the gate on the way out too. I don't know how they found me though, I'd made a sweet camouflage suit out of bits of garbage and had painted my face with old gravy I found in a can. 4:18 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I have some yellow/brown paisley Y-fronts - they ain't really mine, they just appeared one day in my underwear draw. They are clearly from the past i'm guessing the early 70's. I know it's a bit of cheek but if your putting a load on could you try sending them back, i'm sure the colour won't run and ruin your shirts. alex19741 (64

) 2:06 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Nope sorry man, I've said it before and i'll say it again, there is no way to control the vortex. The undies go where the washing machine says it's just too risky, what happens if they get sent back beofre the invention of cotton and end up disrupting the entire present day. That and I don't really want to touch your old Y-fronts or have you mailling them to me. 4:20 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I'm very interested. One question though, when you get inside the said washing machine, it is similar to the Tardis where it is actually bigger inside than it looks from the outside? I want to build an extra room on my house and this could well be the answer to my problem. Portable and roomy! geckochris (13

) 2:09 pm, Wed 10 Jun

From what i can ascertain it's only roomy when the portal is open. If you were to use it as a spare room I don't know how practical it would be, what is the point of a spare room if it has an Allosaurus behind the door? Certainly no good as a nursery, or as an office because you'd get less done than me. 4:23 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Have you ever thought of selling your story to a film production company? I think Russel Crowe should play the washing machine. He's a method actor, so I'm sure he'd be able to get ''in character'', if you know what I mean. Or maybe Pixar could turn it into an animated film. matt_littlewood (150

) 2:13 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I think Danny Divito would be more suitable. And affordable. 4:24 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I think I just peed a little... olorins (52

) 2:13 pm, Wed 10 Jun

eww... Sounds like you have Nana's problem, she has a bag which she can pee in, it's awesome, she can watch the whole starwars double trilogy in one hit without having to get up once. 4:25 pm, Wed 10 Jun

so how many times... have you.... on it... dem4652 (39

) 2:19 pm, Wed 10 Jun

There is something wrong with your keyboard or computer, its replaced some of the poignant words of your sentence with a row of dots. 4:27 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I steal pens from the bank LOL summerdryad (75

) 2:19 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Thats why they put chains on them instead of string. Chains are a lot harder to suck through. 4:28 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Please help; I will be in Iceland soon and it's very important that I am able to ask 'how much for the baby?' extacy (271

) 2:20 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Its "Hvernig mikill fyrir the barn?" if you must know but why in heavens good name would you want to take a baby out of Iceland? They have evil bred into them you know, it's not like you can just train them to be good. One day it'll bring you breakfast in bed and you'll smile and pat its head and then it will stab you in the neck with one of those really big forks and do an ice dance as you gurgle away on your pillow. Seriously its a bad idea. 4:32 pm, Wed 10 Jun

OMG I found an fossilised Iron at my old house - im sorry to say that there was a fossilised wife holding onto it. If it's any consolation, it looks like she's smiling (chicks an ironing eh?) BTW Dave'o if your reading - this doesn't count as Iron Maiden - it's Iron with a Maiden - thunderlizard (15

) 2:24 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Iron Maiden! So thats it! they ARE profits, i knew it! Its definitely a bit ambiguous but definitely a clue to her whereabouts, must find Bruce Dickinson. i'll just add that to my list of clues. 4:35 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I run a brothel and would like to purchase the black dildo model. Is there an extra charge for that attachment? joymama (9

) 2:28 pm, Wed 10 Jun

You spelled Dido wrong and shes not Black, even though she hangs out a bit with Eminem, but then he's not black either. I don't really like Dido's music its about as depressing as staring through the portal into the salivating mouths of a pack of hungry Pyroraptors. P.S I saw your auction for the Unicorn Party Accessories it sounded awesome. 4:43 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I have a proposition for you. Has this stallion of a machine been desexed? (I assume it hasnt, as it sounds quite er, vicious?) If not I believe we should breed it with mine, and start a new era in washing machine technology. Mine is petite, strong, and healthy. It has an amazing ability to beep EXTREMELY loudly for an ASTOUNDING amount of time, after it has successfully completed its cycle. I think we should put them together and see what we get! twinklebottom (94

) 2:36 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Interesting concept but i think breeding this abomination would be illegal, or at least morally reprehensible. Anyway who's going to do the delivery, not me thats for damn sure, I hate to think what a washing machine like mine would be like during childbirth. 4:46 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I have a washing machine that came off the Ark and Noah called it a "Save a day". yes that is its true name! Maybe the new owner could contact me for I'll throw it in! oniti (6

) 2:42 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Remarkable! Are you sure it came off the Ark?, thats quite a find if it did. I'd imagine something like that would fetch a pretty decent sum on money if the church doesn't kill you, bury it, and deny it's existence. 4:55 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Hey Mate....Hope u haven't been been pulled into the vortex of the washing machine.... Due to the eratic behaviour induced by your lack of response please reply before supernova occurs..... My team mates are anxiously checking your listing for more responses....Some aer getting annoyed as you haven't responded LMAO...Cheers sonia676 (0

) 2:44 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Do you have any idea how despondent I am at the end of this string of unanswered questions? For every next question i get a puppy dies. No I'd kidding I like puppies. 4:56 pm, Wed 10 Jun

$30 for the picture? List is separate and with a buy now! I want the picture... I want a piece of TM history. :) feynicks (342

) 2:47 pm, Wed 10 Jun

But i promised i'd give it to my Mum. I can draw more but only if you stop asking questions. I'm still not very good at toe typing otherwise I could do both at the same time. 4:59 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Son of a bitch, your shoes survived... http://studio-props.com/images/1zz25.22.jpg xsumo (29

) 2:47 pm, Wed 10 Jun

NO WAY! Where did you find them? Does the velcro still work? Velcro is amazing stuff it lasts for ages and ages. you can use velcro for all sorts of things. I use it to hold my towels on the wall because I don't have a towel rack. 5:05 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Pa ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha tee hee hee haw har! :D napier01 (62

) 2:49 pm, Wed 10 Jun

You have a very annoying laugh. But thats ok, everyone is different. I get a lazy eye when i drink tequila. 5:06 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Sometimes I wake up in the morning with a runny nose. Any advice? markmie (37

) 2:50 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Live in a house, its cold outside this time of year. 5:07 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I think magnetic field induced by the iron probably caused the wormhole to appear and may be the catalyst to this whole affair. I once had an iron that had ants in it and when I sprayed it with flyspray millions of ants poured out, far to many to have been able to hide inside the little steam hole. Do you have an ant problem? pubquiznz (26

) 2:54 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Yes, well i did, I put some drops of super hot chilli sauce in a squirty bottle of water and sprayed them. They died immediately but so did my eyes and lungs. 5:09 pm, Wed 10 Jun

sooo ummm because I have an evil plan ... so evil you could pin a tail on it and call it a weazle... could I get a freight company to pick up for me? *evil grin* tarnn (1181

) 2:55 pm, Wed 10 Jun

You sure can. As long as you warn them about what they are picking up. I dont want any scenes here, the neighbors are already suspicious. 5:10 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Maybe you now use it as a goldfish bowl. You have made my day, I haven't laughed so loud in a long time. yvonnemary (2

) 2:57 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Nah it smells of old undies and socks, there's too much risk of a fin rot outbreak. 5:12 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Greetings from Omicron 6(The dinosaur homeworld). Can we have our washing machine back as our leader misses its soothing roar. Regards Dino Defence Minister. PS Failure to return our machine will result in us contacting TradeMe..........or a visit from our invasion fleet(they are between invasions so are more than happy to oblige) bazbat (24

) 2:58 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Ummm ok, I don't really know what to do here, you are clearly crazy so ignoring you might send you into a psychotic episode, endangering those close to me. If i go along with you I'll end up in a volly of responses about an imminent dinosaur invasion when I'm supposed to be focussing on Icelandics so I think i will just leave it at this... 5:15 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I want to buy the dinosaur pic. Would I have to buy the piece of metallic evil too? Or are you planning to list other artwork of yours to sell. napier01 (62

) 2:59 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I think I will list more, just got to get through a few responses 1st, ok next.... 5:16 pm, Wed 10 Jun

would it be any good for doing Richard Worth's dirty llaundry since he comes from up your way and has been thru the ringer himself lately? clean_green (44

) 3:00 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I think he's already done it? If it's still sitting around after all this time then he's one messy pup. 5:17 pm, Wed 10 Jun

(1.) Aren't you curious about the land on the other side of the portal? Cos I know I am... (2.) Are you not wondering exactly who is wearing your socks right now? That kind of question would keep me for nights on end! btw I think our washing machines are somehow related, mine has been showing "the signs" of late and I am beginning to become concerned. (ps. - can I be your friend on Facebook?) spear_sister (77

) 3:11 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I'm curious about the Vietnam War, Platoon was a great movie, but in 1966 i would way rather have been watching Mission impossible on my new colour TV than running around in the jungle dodging bullets. This whole dinosaur thing is the same. Dinosaurs and Mikes are not meant to mix. 5:21 pm, Wed 10 Jun

What a shame such misfortune had to befall a fellow Waiuku-an. Is it possible that the machine has been bewitched by bead-clutching, pipe-smoking elders from the ancient tribes of the Awhitu peninusla? 4iz (62

) 3:13 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I dont know about that, I've certainly never been there so i dont know how the washing machine could have. Yuck, i shiver to think what goes on in Awhitu, do they even have washing machines? There was a boy at my school from Awhitu and I'm pretty sure he didn't have a washing machine. They allowed goats inside the house which i always thought was weird. 5:23 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Heard about the scary washing machine from Twitter. I need a machine that is soft and gentle & hypnotises my 19 year old son to put his clothes in the wash. Thanks for making my day with your great humour! mazz (226

) 3:16 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Why dont you theme your washing machine in a way that suits his interests? Involve him and tell him thats what all the cool kids are doing. It'll work for sure. 5:24 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Please, Sell more drawings on trademe! We want more!! **Protests** envious_sins (80

) 3:17 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Time. The one thing i don't seem to have any more. 5:25 pm, Wed 10 Jun

just wondering if you are going to start an auction for the dinosaur picture? ingrid77 (161

) 3:23 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Okay okay, gimme some time, I'll do a series I think. They'll be different dinosaurs but they'll probably all look the same. 5:26 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Hilarious - you are absolutely hilarious....got a link on facebook, so you are being read around the world!...Writing is your forte! ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ I'm zebra's mate & we think you are awesome & the portal sounds pretty good for a friend of mine who needs a scare! T-Rex rocks! ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ run_zebra_run (57

) 3:26 pm, Wed 10 Jun

What are all those funny squiggles, I was led to believe the ~ means approximately. You must be very approximate. 'Very Approximate' is a conundrum. Probably a good band name too for one of those cool new bands were everyone wears big glasses with a fringe. Except they would call the band 'THE Very Approximate' 5:30 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Hello. I once murdered my family but said I was on a paper run and that Dad must have done it, but then I found out that the blood and brainmatter hadn't come out of my clothes. Do you think this machine would be good for washing blood out of boldly coloured jerseys? caveman20000bc (32

) 3:29 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I'm actually amazed that it took this long for a David Bain joke to rear it's head. Thank you for holding off this long. Lets hope it's the last one. 5:31 pm, Wed 10 Jun

This made my day...no wait, my year! After you get rid of this washing machine, will you be my friend? I like the way you think, and I could give you free counselling? shedvl (238

) 3:31 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Are you a trained councillor? I have been warned about unqualified councillors. My councillor at school told me I should be a teacher. What a weird thing to say to someone. 5:34 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Bro, how stoned were you when you wrote that kickass description? nmowday (37

) 3:32 pm, Wed 10 Jun

On a scale of 1-10? ....1 meaning completely stone called straight ....and 10 meaning so utterly rubber-faced I'm lying on my bed and cant even move my arms and legs and see Super Mario come running into my room, stand on my chest, pull out my tongue with pliers, reach into his apron and pull out a nail, then poke the nail through my tongue then run away laughing manically leaving me coughing over an imaginary nail thats still through my tongue? 5:40 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Love your work. Mine does the same thing, maybe we should mate them and take over the world with our own private army of feral mutant washing machines...? Or build a time machine and check out cool stuff in history, maybe bring back a couple of thise dinasaurs you saw, just for a laugh.. Would certainly help cure the tedium-of-winter-in-a-small-town i'm suffering from. Oookayyyy, off to take my meds now.... Penza :-b penza (1150

) 3:38 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Bring one back? Are you mad? i kindly ask you to refer again to the picture, maybe i didn't make the claws big enough? i should have added blood to the teeth maybe. 5:41 pm, Wed 10 Jun

you absolutly rock!!... well at least your freaky machine does!... I wish I had cash, I could turn it into a tourist attraction for blenheim, god knows we need something other than damn grapes for the tourists!!!.. Good luck for your auction, I hope some poor poor sucker gets it, but then, it may eat them in their sleep, and start stalking you to get revenge?!!! aaarrrrgggghhhahahha (evil laugh)hahhahha!!!..... toranalovers (190

) 3:38 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I went to the Blenheim library once on a Wednesday afternoon. It was my first time in Blenheim. It happened to be the library group trip day for the "Special People" of the area, I actually thought all the people in Blenheim were like that for a while until I realised. Then i married one (a normal one, still special but good special, not special like my friend Soren). Then she got Kelvinator'd. 5:45 pm, Wed 10 Jun

That is brilliant;!!! This was posted to me on Face book!!! Your famous love it love it. The visuals.... The voices....... Can you be my friend :) venus9 (173

) 3:38 pm, Wed 10 Jun

What will you tell people when they ask where you met your weird new friend? On trade me? 5:47 pm, Wed 10 Jun

did the cat escape from the washing machine? you know, the one with the lemonhead. unclepauly (30

) 3:40 pm, Wed 10 Jun

No thats not my cat. I found it, looking at funny cats on the interwebs is awesome. I googled image searched "Cat with a Lemon on its head" in brackets, try it, it works, google never disappoints. 5:49 pm, Wed 10 Jun

is affected by the type of washing powder you use ? I know that some machines can have adverse reactions to certain powders.I am also interested in the gold fish holder as well thescottdog (77

) 3:40 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Do you always start your sentences in the middle? My wife does that. sometimes she changes to a completely different subject half way through a sentence and then at the end asks you a question relating to another completely different topic. Its definitely not dull. 5:50 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I give up. Why? mikeloder (81

) 3:49 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Why? Because it's in my hallway and it looks weird. I need it gone, I can hardly see the massive picture of the man wearing aviators on the wall any more. 5:52 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Awesome Mike, I havn't laughed so hard in a long time. Good luck with the auction and best wishes for a speedy mental recovery. tweedle2 (125

) 3:50 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Thank you Dean. I'm already better :) 5:55 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I dont really need a time/washing machine and frankly my own shadow frightens me (sometimes...when I have my puffer jacket on mostly) but the dinosaur picture looks real nice and would look great on my fridge. Would you consider unbundling? kiwitones (39

) 3:51 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I'm considering all sorts of things 5:57 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Where did this killer beast come from? I think the washing machine and my sister are related.............. dread-eye (14

) 3:54 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Originally? It has a sticker on the back saying Fisher and Paykel 1985 but it could have been put there by Icelandinc people to trick me. 5:59 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Hilarious, haven't giggled so much in a long time. I heard about the auction on the local tauranga radio station. You are becoming quite famous! Don't need a new machine although my machine does make similar sounds, maybe they're related? Good luck :) verucasalt (34

) 4:01 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Awesome I'm glad you had a good giggle. I've had a few myself. Maybe the assembly line was haunted? It was 24 years ago now, imagine the amount of filth this trooper's had through it in the last 24 years. It was first owned by a dutch man from Hillsborough, i used to have the original warrantee certificate with the owners proud signature. Little did he know it would one day take over the world. The little Kelvinator that could :) 9:56 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Does it have a separate compartment for fabric softener? thebeezneez (141

) 4:02 pm, Wed 10 Jun

You know what i don't think it does, this is the one where you insert the washing powder down the spindle. Maybe you can put fabric softener in the little cup thing at the top. He he I said 'insert' Oh and that reminds me, it annoys me greatly when people put the washing powder in the fabric softner cup and you end up with a cake of soap and still dirty clothes. WHY? Is it that hard? 9:59 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I am wondering if you are wanting to make a deal. I am a psyhco analyst and I am willing to provide free counselling services in exchange for you to volunteer for a study into the interrelationship between delusions of animorphication and preschool drawing abilities in adults. I have a strong feeling you might be the ideal subjuct if not the only one. How about it? Oh OK!!! I am lonely and just wanted some one to talk to. I liked the saddle and the dinosaurs but not the washing machine! masterskater (16

) 4:05 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Wow you really had me going for a second there. You're quite convincing. I resent the fact that you have elluded that my drawing ability is pre-school level. i'll have you know i got a 2nd at calf-club for my cow picture. I would have won but Jeremy traced his one out of a farmyard book and it was way more realistic than mine. Mine looked like a lemur. 10:02 pm, Wed 10 Jun

According to google, there is approximately 3000km between Canada and Iceland. Have not yet been invaded, most likely because the two countries are very similar in geography. The Icelandic are more likely to invade NZ due to the differences between the countries. Maybe you should keep the washing machine for protection... likestolook (15

) 4:05 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Thank you for this insight. It is valuable intelligence. Who are you working for, you really know your stuff. 10:04 pm, Wed 10 Jun

how bout a cat with a dog on it's head .. http://www.dailyhaha.com/_pics/dog_sitting_on_cat.htm kiwifulla (37

) 4:07 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Awesome, now we're cooking! If only my wife were still here to see that she'd love it. 10:15 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Put some drawings of things you've seen on your travels up for auctioN! milan82 (85

) 4:10 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Maybe i will, i saw a volcano once, true story, I might be able to squeeze a volcano into a dinosaur picture. Why is it that Dinosaurs hang out by volcanos so much? Maybe they like the smell? 10:17 pm, Wed 10 Jun

omg!!! my washing machine did the same thing!!!!! freeeeeaky dude... noni123 (134

) 4:15 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Yeah, it doesn't get any easier either, gives me the jeebies every time. 10:17 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I feel bad. All these visitors to your page, and no buyers. It must make you sad. bucda397 (29

) 4:16 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Sad? Heck no I'm getting rid of this thing, that makes me real happy. 10:18 pm, Wed 10 Jun

falling out of the boat for nearly a minute, that was the second scariest moment. Made me wonder.... what was your first???? P.S I emailed 3 news the link to your auction :0 Seiously! Get into childrens story writing, you could be the next JK Rowling. Imagine a universe where the kelvinator was KING! sez67 (23

) 4:16 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Oh hmmm I dont know... how about the time I NEARLY GOT SUCKED INTO THE MOUTH OF A HUNGRY T-REX WEARING ONLY A T-SHIRT!!! Oh and that book would not be suitable for children. I don't think you quite comprehend the fear here... 10:22 pm, Wed 10 Jun

What product do you use to wash your goldfish? I've tried everything I can think of, but I can't seem to get the stain out.... s_austin1 (22

) 4:18 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Johnson and Johnson's No More Tears, my freind Russell who works at the icecream factory uses it to wash his eyeballs so I figured its probably ok on fish. He has conjunctivitis but I keep telling him it's probably from washing his eyeballs. He makes a real nice icecream called gone fishing and it has a little mini chocolate fish. Its my favorite. 10:27 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Do you have a brother named Stewart? tm user name: stewart.sells andy141 (285

) 4:20 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I went to school with a boy called Stuart. He bit the end off a twink pen once and had to fill his mouth with toilet paper to soak it all up. He now works for the government. 6:06 pm, Wed 10 Jun

You say you've got a Teslar coil there too.. maybe that's helping to power the whole vortex thing. Way back in the time before people worried about OSH (actually before OSH existed), a mate of my partner built a teslar coil in a pinball machine... it had a four foot high coil and made hair stand on end 6 feet away, scary scary beast... plastic8 (309

) 4:22 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Hang on a minute, if its four feet high, how does it fit in a pinball machine? It must have been massive. Was it a full size pinball machine you could run around in? 10:28 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Without killing all hollywood options - when my washing machine did this exact thing (marching across the kitchen to bump heads with the fridge, destroying my kitchen benchtop the process) the man who came to fix it pointed out that the transit bolts were still in place (bolts that hold the drum in place - they need to be unbolted before use/when installed). Do you think your bolts are still place? After a year of houserattling, that would be a great (ironic) ending to your horror movie. extraordinary (6

) 4:22 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Hmmmn, transit bolts...if they're still there then thats 24 consecutive years of servicemen missing what should be an obvious fix. I probably should have said in the auction but the rear service plate is missing, it's been serviced so many times I think the plate wore away from people touching it like those Mother Mary statues in Rome. Anyway I digress, the innards seem to be unrestrained, when running, the drum moves around heaps, no bolts in there I'm sure of it. 10:32 pm, Wed 10 Jun

You are quite right about there being something "not right" about Paul Henry, I wonder if he is a Icelandic that has transversed a portal of doom and rides a dinosaur around his apartment in his pink glitter undies. I do have to wonder if your washing machine is the reason we all now have this curse on humanity on our television. I flinch for you at the thought of being harassed by Campbell Live, and the dodgy guy that wants a coffee and has a proposition for you.(dating site disaster me thinks merrin1 (37

) 4:24 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Ew yuck, I would hate to have to lie there in bed at night with an imagination like yours. Where do you come up with this stuff? Paul Henry in a glitter G-string? thats horrific, if he comes on the breakfast show dressed like that tomorrow you're to blame. 10:34 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I know you have many questions to answer, however, I need help with a situation and I believe you may be able to help me. My mother in law comes over every saturday to do her washing (her machine self destructed) and I was wondering if i could hire yours off you this weekend.... I cant however guarantee that she wont fight her way back through the portal and end up squatting at your place! shinrai (80

) 4:32 pm, Wed 10 Jun

This weekend I will no longer own this piece of hell-spawn devil machine so you will have to either talk nicely to the auction winer or perhaps, wait for it....bid yourself (cue tribal drums of doom) 10:37 pm, Wed 10 Jun

:) you definately have a way with words :) you probably already know that this trade of yours is circling round the internet via email FW. you'll get replies from russia before you know it ... direct us to your webpage! noddybabe1 (299

) 4:46 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Thats ok, just as long as we don't get any Icelanders. I don't think they will they should be building nests this time of year and lining them with baby seal fur to prepare for the oncoming winter. Yes they club baby seals, sometimes they have to hit them several times. I once saw an Icelander make a slipper out of a baby seal by simply pulling it inside out over his foot like a sock. 10:40 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I am obsessed with your ramblings!! I haven't got any work done today at all...my only achievement has been keeping up with your hilarious anecdotes involving prehistoric creatures, gold fish and scarey washing machines - an epic day if ever! Keep it up am looking forward to keeping this routine up until the auction finishes! Oops almost forgot have also managed to become a facebook fan too!! http://www.facebook.com/pages/Scary-washing-machine/89255828348 :) :) ewan_beck (21

) 4:46 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Imagine how I feel. Oh god 8 days to go, why oh why did I go for the 10 day option, WHY!! 10:41 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Mate, u are hillarious! You may even make the 6.00 news tonight! I'm sure john C live, would like to chat 2 u! lol thanx for the laugh, i see u'll be doing a lot of reading!! CHEERS =D bh1007 (134

) 4:48 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Well it's currently 10:40pm oh sorry i mean 2240hrs (I have to appear professional here) Didn't make the news and I'm very glad, i havn't been able to pluck up the courage to do the washing yet and I'm out of clothes. I have a bathrobe on but I 'm not sure it's going to last the next 8 days. It's already showing signs of neglect. 10:44 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I'm wondering if I could please have the number of your dealer...? ;) thats the most out-of-it auction eva lol dime-a-dozen (50

) 4:48 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Sure, 021443210 they'll probably pretend they don't know you as they're well trained in aversion, you have to say the codeword: libra delta delta cobra 10:47 pm, Wed 10 Jun

My friend Karl and I are building a pod racer like the ones on star wars but we need 2 engines. We thought your washing machine would be perfect but we need two .... i dont suppose you would have another one to go with this one????? rons (105

) 4:49 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Awesome! There is only one scene in my mind greater than the thought of building a pod-racer and thats a world where Kiwi's have tamed dinosaurs and use them in battle to defeat Iceland. Like this.... http://www.chiefmag.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2008/11/holy_shit_this_is_awesome.jpg 10:50 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Well done, you are a genius I would buy that just for the story if i wasnt moving away! jordanroach (5

) 4:49 pm, Wed 10 Jun

It'll travel...... 10:50 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I'm wondering if I could please have the number of your dealer...? ;) thats the most out-of-it auction eva lol dime-a-dozen (50

) 4:49 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Haven't you already asked me this? Oh I get it, you're toasted right now aren't you? What level on the 1-10 scale previously described are you right now? 10:52 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Can i be your facebook friend? t4n1th (216

) 4:52 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Will you send me a birthday card? A real one not one of those rubbish e-cards that trick you into spamming your friends. If thats a yes then you got a deal. 10:53 pm, Wed 10 Jun

What happens if you turn it inside out? krazee42 (12

) 5:04 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Hmmmn, thats a bit out of left field. I don't really know, it sure would look interesting though. Not as interesting as an inside out seal though, especially one that had been eating rock crabs all afternoon. 10:55 pm, Wed 10 Jun

hahahaha... Classic!! ayu4 (6

) 5:09 pm, Wed 10 Jun

How minimalist. 10:55 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Have you thought about a package deal - you could get together with the guy with the "Very Dangerous Chair" TRADEME listing and literally have a killer deal on offer! mkddkm (9

) 5:10 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Well i'll be darned, i have two of those very same chairs in my office, yes he's right they were $90, he must be a nancy though as i can lean right back on mine and not even get scared at all. They are covered in 'Pleather' Pleather is a cross between plastic and leather and pleasure. Unfortunately they skimped a bit on the pleasure. I get a sweaty bum on mine and thats not good when I only have a bathrobe left to last 8 days. 11:00 pm, Wed 10 Jun

im Intrigued that nakeddave is leading the bidding. if your naked, you dont wear clothes, why do you need a washing machine? oh oh oh i know, to access the dinosaurs. of course. please disregard this question echo55 (158

) 5:13 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Indeed that is an intriguing observation you have made. 11:01 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I'm glad you're not on fire. Your washing machine should be buried, covered in lime and then forgotten about - until it comes back to haunt you. Needless to say you'll sell it, but the horrors will stay with you forever... I'm sorry, I can only sympathize with you from afar. wildwildwest (12

) 5:18 pm, Wed 10 Jun

You sound like you are speaking from experience. The lime is something many people forget about when burying evidence. I like lime sherbert. Its my second favorite after Orange. 11:04 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Great Scots!! Free Ice creams!!! gooseman. (1464

) 5:19 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Yeah i know i could hardly believe it myself. Do you want to know the really amazing thing? He used to work at a beer factory. That is a true story. there is only one thing cooler than free icecream and dinosaur battles and thats free beer. 11:05 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I love this. I think you should quite possibly auction off your dinosaur drawing seperately it's gold. what a talent. have a good one hope u get some good $ for this baby hard_surfer (167

) 5:30 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I'm not selling a baby I'm selling a clapped out old washing machine. Oh i mean a really awesome one in mint condition. I think selling babies is illegal. Especially if it is someone else's baby and they paid you to look after it. 11:06 pm, Wed 10 Jun

this things worth a fortune, with a bit of fine tuning i reckon you could time travel and open portals to other worlds. screw washing with it. i suggest strapping a saddle and bridle on it, and challenging cowboys to ride it. qikky (138

) 5:32 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Oh yeah i'm way past washing with it, it's just not worth the risk. It's not even plumbed in, I don't want to grow accustomed to it and think yeah one more load will be fine, what's the worst that can go wrong...boom dinosaur land. 11:08 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I love Lamp! darinz (26

) 5:39 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Thats not even a complete sentence. I have two white lamps which i borrowed about a year ago. I think the owner has forgotten about them which makes me pleased. They are halogen ones, don't what ever you do touch the glass it's really hot. 11:10 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I nearly wet myself reading your encounter - man no wonder you are selling it. Hope the trauma of the dinosaur encounter subsides and you can trust a new one. Seriously have to say it is one of the funniest things i have read in a long long time... Thank you and good luck with the beast... colleen8 (130

) 5:41 pm, Wed 10 Jun

There are a lot of people on here with incontinence issues, maybe that should be my next invention, some sort of adult diaper that's fashionable. 11:11 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Hey bud I am really curious to what this thing sounds like... Any chance you could put a video of it working its magic on you tube and post the link up? samboydie (188

) 5:43 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Yeah thats tomorrow's job. A man from the radio rang. I thought he was an Icelander for a minute there but it turned out he was from Palmerston North. 11:13 pm, Wed 10 Jun

My fridge ate my cat (I know this because it was meowing and when I opened the door fur was in the butter) and when I opened the oven a cow flew out and hit me on my head? Anything to do with you? And if so, do I have to pay for it? sennytar (591

) 5:43 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Ok thats weird, you say a cow hit you in the head...and it came out of the oven? The cat in the fridge I can believe, I did it myself once but it was a freezer. Only it didn't jump out, I had to pick it out with a serving spoon. It's always been a bit wary of me since then. 11:16 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Is that shadow on the washing machine one of them dinosaurs? It looks like one... becster122 (16

) 5:50 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Hey thats me, I'm a picture of beauty not a dinosaur. Some say I'm the Vitruvean man, I haven't actually heard them say it but I'm pretty sure they do. 11:18 pm, Wed 10 Jun

G'day I have forwarded this to many Redundant Fisher & Paykel staff here in Dunners, they need a good laugh. I sure had one, You hit National Radio this Arvo Regards Retired F & P member Al. ajsjbs (8

) 5:51 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Oh man that sucks, ah well at least F&P aren't hogging all the good inventors any more, hopefully you guys can spread out a bit to other companies and make more infernal products that just...wont...die. Good work i have to say, 24 years and it's only getting stronger. 11:20 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Do the eyes on the dinosaurs move if you shake the picture? If so stick the picture on the washing machine for some cheap entertainment. alec12 (45

) 5:52 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Thats actually a good idea might just do that. 11:23 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I wouldn't be too worried about the portal. Although they are not normally visible to the naked human eye, they are very common. Every seventh time a washing machine is switched on a small portal opens and usually sucks through a single sock. It is not unheard of for them to claim iron-wielding wives but this is a VERY rare occurrence. It shouldn't happen again with your machine. manta (1202

) 5:59 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I don't know man it was pretty out of control, I'm going to fire it up again tomorrow I think and see what happens. 11:24 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I see a connection here, this looks easier to transport and but just as potentially dangerous http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=olZT9uXzqek fweddy (1012

) 6:01 pm, Wed 10 Jun

That was a really good film. Everyone should check that out. I would use it to reach inside the cat next time it eats my goldfish. 11:29 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I have your machines evil twin -its DarthVader black and yes with spikes too, but it also has four gargoyles on the top corners. Tried to sell it but in front of the buyers the dial slowly and evilly rotated a full 360degrees before projectile vomiting the dirty water when the drain cycle kicked in. So now on washday I appease it with deathmetal on the stereo, n just strap myself in an' enjoy the ride. pesky (2

) 6:02 pm, Wed 10 Jun

You strap yourself in and enjoy the ride??!! Ok and i thought this was a family show. 11:31 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I just showed my 2 year old the picture of the cat with the lemon on its head that you posted. Long silence, then "Him grumpy". Very astute child - probably wouldn't be bothered by yoru scary washign machine. He likes dinosaurs, too. niks7 (58

) 6:09 pm, Wed 10 Jun

His powers of deduction are beyond his years. Hes a keeper, dont sell him. 11:32 pm, Wed 10 Jun

You really need to rethink the sales pitch on this. If you pointed out that it would make teenagers leave home, would get rid of unwanted house guests, could be left to run a full cycle and de-clutter a room, then I suspect you would be into the big dollars. I am sure you could then have the funds to invent something to get the wife back, whilst being invisible to the dinosaurs. I do however think the iron is a gone for good. No one is smart enough to figure out how to get an iron back. dlclarke (155

) 6:14 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Mate I'm just telling it how it is, there was a portal, it took my iron and my pants, I got the fright of my life and now I want it gone. Its not like I'm making stuff up just to sell it, that would be sad and dishonest. 11:34 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Will my washing machine become evil if it listens to Bjork? roxykittykat (1

) 6:15 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Most definitely, I can say that with confidence. You know she's a robot dont you? She can talk to machines and there is a hidden wavelength in her music that machines can hear, thats what makes it sound so weird. 11:36 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Love it!!! brilliant!!! friggin amazing with all the questions! it's everywhere; facebook, msn, tonnes and tonnes of email threads shay_xie (8

) 6:24 pm, Wed 10 Jun

*gracious bow* 11:36 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Love it, good to see people with a sense of humour. Hope your auction goes well. michellg (322

) 6:24 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Thank you please come again. 11:37 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Oops forgot to ask you my question..... will you marry me so I can have your babies? pesky (2

) 6:24 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Thats a bit forward of you. You know the rules its Natalie or nothing. At least till the wife gets back then it's both. 11:38 pm, Wed 10 Jun

It's for reasearch, I won't let it grow to the stage where it can make it's own way around the house. extacy (271

) 6:29 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Hmm still risky.. 11:38 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Don't you think it's a bit callous selling off what may potentially be the only method you have to find your wife? Or is this actually a masterful method of spousal disposal with millions of witnesses watching and suspecting nothing... dc72 (96

) 6:30 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I'm hoping that if someone else cleverer than me is successful in stabilising the portal opening they'll be kind enough to return her. 11:41 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Was this machine once owned by Shrodinger? Seems to me it would explain the other dimension stuff quite well. And have you lost any cats? happy_hedghog11 (24

) 6:36 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Well it was owned by a Dutchman, but I'm pretty sure his name was not Shrodinger. 11:42 pm, Wed 10 Jun

that is cool..... well done on the surviving of the portal thing, its pretty hard to do these days, what with all the dinosaurs wearing left socks only and trying to get through them so that they can eat you and all. trendy_kaff (38

) 6:43 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I dont think dinosaurs can wear the socks, A) most of them dont have opposable thumbs so putting them on is a chore, B) Most of their feet are too big C) Ones like T-Rex cant actually touch their toes. My freind Paul from Grand Junction Colorado gets arms like a T-rex when he's had too much bourbon. His face looks like Woody Harrilson. he makes me laugh. 11:46 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I win =] deanwebber (50

) 6:44 pm, Wed 10 Jun

ok you win. 11:47 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I reckon this would be very handy in Palmy, especially Massey Uni to rock things up... Can your Kelvinator time travel back to get rid of exams? Oooh even better can it somehow warp our lecturers back to that terrifying time for a split second.. let them know what it feels like answering questions they pull up from.. well.. another dimension.. bellk9 (56

) 6:45 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I dont know man thats asking a lot. You guys are pretty clever though, see what the mechatronics lab can do with it. 11:48 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Are you related to Britney Spears? loufloo (347

) 6:54 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I guess somehow i probably am. 11:50 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Hi Man my girlfriend got soo excited after reading your listing, she wants to know what it's doing Fri nite she will bring her own batteries.????? I've just finished moping up the tears of laughter.Thanks for making so many people happy with your sense of humour Cheers Baz klompi (13

) 6:58 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Does she want to do some washing? It's mains powered, tell her she wont need batteries. Also you'd better bring a harness or something incase she ends up in the portal. And I'm not accepting any responsibility. 11:52 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Would you consider swapping the machine for a GOLDEN LLAMA???? Check out my listing if you interested oldgamez (67

) 6:59 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I certainly think your LLama would look nice on my mantlepiece. I have an elephant made of some sort of stone. The Llama would be a fitting accompaniment. However I would not want to stop the bidding process on your Llama as i see it's raised funds are going to a worthy cause. 7:20 am, Thu 11 Jun

what a laugh,your brilliant,my dad told me about your listing today as i am looking for a machine,think this one might cause me some trouble as it seems to like eating children and partners,lol.... goodluck to you,lets hope the washing machine will get taken before it gets you!!!!!! ayisha_nz (71

) 7:01 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Yeah dont buy this one thats for sure. I'm eating a mandarin. do all mandarins have the same number of segments? I like mandarins. 7:21 am, Thu 11 Jun

Reading about all the things you and other people see while useing household appliances convinces me that preservatives in food these days are reaching a whole new level, forget smoking pot, tell me where you buy your groceries! (for those people against pot smoking..........you should stop rubbing the pot so fast on the stove element!) scoobyduck (228

) 7:06 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I just peeled another mandarin. This one has 11 segments, the last one also had 11 segments. Strange that an object of nature is built around an undivisible prime number. 11 being the weirdest of all. 7:24 am, Thu 11 Jun

If I fill this beauty up with kerosene, will I be able to wash engine and gearbox parts in my busy earthmover and farm machinery maintenance business? groovin (94

) 7:11 pm, Wed 10 Jun

The drum is stainless steel so is therefore impervious to solvents. The spindle to the best of my knowledge is Acrylic Butadiene Styrene which may not with stand the rigor of a Kerosene environment. There are waterbased non-corrosive solvent substitutes you could look into. 7:28 am, Thu 11 Jun

What a awesome auction !I would've liked to win the auction just to shake your hand lol. Goodluck with the auction ! diablo1 (192

) 7:12 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I like handshakes. Some peoples handshakes are like someone handing you a cold peeled sea bass. 7:31 am, Thu 11 Jun

Could this be my ex wife coming back for revenge? malcolm100 (56

) 7:14 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Did you marry a 1985 Kelvinator? 7:31 am, Thu 11 Jun

I think I once had a fight with your washing machine in the carpark behind the tennis courts in Torbay; I have mad karate skills and can also spit pretty good but it didn't fight fair and now I can only see in night vision. I hate your washing machine and hope it dies. Re: your drawings of sharks and the undertaker - have you ever considered drawing sharks with your left hand and all other stuff with your right hand? Just a thought. Good luck with the sale. Washing machine - go and die. la25 (7

) 7:20 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Oh man I'm jealous as. I was in a 25 dude brawl in a park in Torbay on my stag party. I didn't come out with night vision but i had to buy a new mattress. It was a big night. 7:33 am, Thu 11 Jun

My mum wants to know if you will marry her? haydenbonney (2

) 7:23 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Is your last name Portman? 7:34 am, Thu 11 Jun

Hey hey! I am quite fond of a bit of action, on our washing machine on the Spin cycle(With two wet towels put to one side!)!!! Do you think we could Harnce This machines powers to the pleasure of my other half???? matthewshea (102

) 7:27 pm, Wed 10 Jun

What you do in the privacy of your own home is completely up to you. I do all sorts of things in the privacy of my own home. I once piled the chairs and couches together and made an awesome fort. 7:36 am, Thu 11 Jun

I am on solar power - do you think she will be nicer to me ? floats (6

) 7:27 pm, Wed 10 Jun

You run on solar power? I've read about people like you. You guys were on the news once but you were drinking tea throughout the interview which was technically cheating. I tried running on solar power but I just got too hungry and gave up. I just checked another mandarin. 8 segments. 7:39 am, Thu 11 Jun

No. Why cant I do standup? mikeloder (81

) 7:34 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Oh man I thought I cleverly got around you last time but your back again. Its ok though, just because you cant do stand up it doesn't mean your not funny. Quiet the opposite. Your awesome at sit-down. There I said it. It wasn't my joke but your welcome to use it. PS Linda says hi. 7:43 am, Thu 11 Jun

blah, ha ha. sellmebuyit (102

) 7:35 pm, Wed 10 Jun

The answer is behind you. 7:43 am, Thu 11 Jun

Greetings, Here's a thought please please please put a very long extension cord on this beast and let it loose on the set of "Singing Bee" I hate this programme sooo much and I reckon you would be doing the country a huge service and you would be knighted. PS You are a good dinosaur drawer. vitaminh (494

) 7:40 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I think the contestants of Singing Bee shoudl get more points for using their own made up words. Extra points if they can cleverly incorporate words like Venus and rhyme them without potty words. 7:48 am, Thu 11 Jun

wow 67 unanswered questions. with this one added, that makes 68. Hope you get time to answer them before auction ends. You are brilliant. buckyboy (128

) 7:42 pm, Wed 10 Jun

If only I had honed my toe typing more. I read a book of separating the two sides of the brain to run independently. i have two computers it would be awesome to be able to answer two questions at the same time, one with each hand. That can be my next skill i train I think. 7:51 am, Thu 11 Jun

Just wanted to add my 2cents worths with all hese questions :D trade_addict (141

) 7:44 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I'm really glad that you did! Your input was invaluable. I mean that literally though not in the normal sense of the word invaluable. Technically 'in-valuable' should mean 'not valuable' like 'in-visible' means 'not-visible'. Invisibility would be an awesome skill. 7:59 am, Thu 11 Jun

Bloody legend...you rock! whitehawk (189

) 7:44 pm, Wed 10 Jun

*bows graciously* 7:59 am, Thu 11 Jun

Wanna swap for a 1980's vanity that can lift the surface off a road? doozle (248

) 7:47 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Intriguing..... I saw a truck stuck on a steep hill once. 8:00 am, Thu 11 Jun

Ha do you remember that time in "Ferris Bullers day off" where they tried to take miles of Camrons dads Ferrari by reversing it, But then it fell out of the window? That was funny. vitaminh (494

) 7:49 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Oh yeah that WAS funny! Cameron is such a character he makes me laugh with his zany antics. My friend Cameron (no relation of Ferris's friend) fell over and broke a toilet bowl with his head. They took him to hospital to check for fractures and the x-ray machine was too weak and they had to go to another hospital. Thats how we found out his head was so thick. Man we have had some fun since then. Nothing can break it, nothing. He can also fit a whole pack of cigarettes in his mouth box and all. 12:04 am, Thu 11 Jun

Mike the whole world is now watching you... well, maybe only those with access to the internet but still.... you're a hit in the UK, France and Nth America.... keep writing, you have a future doing this. Oh and my washing machine does the same unless you really cram it full... except for the time portal and dinosaur thing....oh and you can have my iron, it's a really good one but we have no use for it:) there's not even any ants in it. Good luck mattone2 (61

) 7:59 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Awesome..... so..... how do i get this iron, Hang on, is this a trap? 8:02 am, Thu 11 Jun

I can draw better dinosaurs than you geographer (6

) 8:06 pm, Wed 10 Jun

No you are. 8:02 am, Thu 11 Jun

Heard this read out on National Radio today and wanted to thank you for cheering so many people up :) I acknowledge you! gedhouse (100

) 8:12 pm, Wed 10 Jun

My sister used to work for National Radio. Now she lives in Invercargill. Its very cold there. The phone lines froze up last time I talked to her and the words came through really slowly. She has a heater though so she'll be ok. 8:04 am, Thu 11 Jun

Hi, can you auction your drawings please? i will bid :) pineapplepip (23

) 8:17 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Watch this space 8:04 am, Thu 11 Jun

You've inspired me to learn how to type with my toes. And I'm stocking up for the icelandic invasion too.... what should I store? Do you think the kelvinator could be used as a secret weapon against the icelanders? s_austin1 (22

) 8:17 pm, Wed 10 Jun

They're actually really hard to kill but their one weakness is they are afraid of eagles so if you can find anything with an eagle on it you can use it to ward them off. If you can get hold of a real eagle you will be safe as houses. proper houses too not those rubbish ones they have made out of snow. 8:06 am, Thu 11 Jun

I know i'm just adding to the list of already growing 'questions' but wanted the opportunity to say what a fabulously funny listing! I've forwarded this on in the hope it may generate some bids and not more 'questions' that you're not able to answer! PS... Scary dinosaurs, I'd need councelling too.... ;-) hayley1975 (26

) 8:20 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Do you have snakes where you're from? 8:12 am, Thu 11 Jun

Hello, have you considered offering this to the Dept of Corrections as part of their corrective actions for violent offenders? tweedygirl (397

) 8:24 pm, Wed 10 Jun

It will only make them more powerful. This thing must be kept in the right hands. 8:12 am, Thu 11 Jun

I have heard the American government pay good money for weapons of mass destruction, they may be interested and could send this beast to Afghanistan or Iraq and solve all there problems. gromit01 (77

) 8:27 pm, Wed 10 Jun

If they could get it to open the porthole under a big lake they could use it to irrigate the desert. By desert I mean sandy wasteland not pudding. I love pudding. 8:14 am, Thu 11 Jun

Bid people,bid!!!!!! lovetheeighties (269

) 8:29 pm, Wed 10 Jun

. 8:15 am, Thu 11 Jun

Bid people,bid!!!!!! lovetheeighties (269

) 8:29 pm, Wed 10 Jun

You said that already 8:15 am, Thu 11 Jun

my husband won't let me do the washing until i have transferred the bonus bonds into joint names freiya (29

) 8:36 pm, Wed 10 Jun

What are bonus bonds anyway? Does anyone really know the answer to that? i bet the bonus bonds people don't even know. 8:17 am, Thu 11 Jun

i saw a horror movie with one of these in it, terifying didnt sleep for days skidmarky (270

) 8:38 pm, Wed 10 Jun

It's generally easier to sleep at night anyway. Sunlight releases hormone into your bloodstream which keeps you awake. I think this is what drove the Icelandics mad. 8:18 am, Thu 11 Jun

Saw a cougar eating a twinkie once... ken652 (3

) 8:50 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Awesome, I think couger's are omnivores. 8:21 am, Thu 11 Jun

P1:Hi my name is Krystle and I am Karen's friend. I don't have a verified account myself. I plastered your link all over facebook, several of my friends have as well. We think you are so coooooooollllllll... We want to worship you; are you interested in starting a cult? we already have a chant or two. Hare hare, washing machine, Hare hare, washing machine... Mike is our god! venus9 (173

) 8:51 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Ah oh, impersonating deity is considered blasphemous in many cultures. Do you remember that bit in Starwars when the ewoks thought C3po was a god and Luke used the force to lift him up and the ewoks got scared and cut them loose? That bit was awesome. They almost got eaten. Ewoks wouldn't have seemed cute wiping blood off their fur and sucking up sinew like spaghetti. George Lucas made a wise choice there which spawned a whole sideline franchise even though it was considered inferior. 8:27 am, Thu 11 Jun

i'd like to see all these un-answered questions answered, something seems a little out of wack with this auction, are you sure the washing machine hasn't taken a life to date? tomo124 (44

) 8:52 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Still here just a little swamped... 8:27 am, Thu 11 Jun

P2: We have uniforms as well. They are white like in a laundromat. We will scare off the demons and dinosaurs for you. We may even drink poison coolade (we have yet to discuss this) for when the Aliens come. Are you on facebook? We love you. Please be my friend. (and our god) You can find me as Krystle Romayne on Crackbook (some of us have addictions). yours faithfuly Karen and Krystle Ps Karen says: All her friends are weird like you. venus9 (173

) 8:53 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Are you twins? Twins are weird, especially the ones that look just the same. Simon and Lance from my school looked the same except one had a mullet. i think that one was Simon. 8:29 am, Thu 11 Jun

its about 3,756 km from canada to iceland, but it would probably be further if you tried to drive:) maybe alan gibbs would lend you an aquada... mattone2 (61

) 8:58 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Dude i don't want to go there, why would I? I'm glad we are in different hemispheres. I hear they are teaching Polar bears to carry guns on their backs, if they do we might be screwed. 8:30 am, Thu 11 Jun

i think my dryer could take it out in a fight. illij57 (63

) 9:00 pm, Wed 10 Jun

What's your dryer got? Does it blow flames? My friend Ryan tried to blow flames once and his hair caught on fire. 8:31 am, Thu 11 Jun

LOL i frikin love u! this made my day, good thing u got away..this girl didnt http://donaldb.files.wordpress.com/2007/03/crazy.jpg ndreea (7

) 9:12 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I wonder if she is just a torso with arms and a head? 8:32 am, Thu 11 Jun

BRO your fuckin hilarious. even ur replys are awsome. i like the 1 about the shark drawings and the undertaker. i might have to buy 1 off u 1 day. legend!! kiwiboi106 (0

) 9:18 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I'm really pleased with those ones. I think you should get them as a tattoo, one on each arm. 8:33 am, Thu 11 Jun

Have you tried CERN(http://public.web.cern.ch/public/)? i'm sure they'd be interested in a way to discover inter-dimensional portals on the cheap. lol_trademe (27

) 9:21 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Yeah the Columbian Ecstasy Runners Network could certainly be interested, using it to transport smack would certainly cut out the middleman. 8:40 am, Thu 11 Jun

Do you have the matching dryer. Need a partnership to really scare the neighbours hmdltd (137

) 9:25 pm, Wed 10 Jun

No sorry i prefer to drip dry, dryers are so harsh on your garmets. My wife once put my new hoodie in a dryer, now it looks like a stout t-shirt with a hood. Do you remember hooded t-shirts?, they were awesome. I had a highlighter yellow one with Catchit written on the front. They were phased out with the introduction of flap hats which negated the need for a hood. Flap hats were not as awesome so it was a disappointing time for many. 8:45 am, Thu 11 Jun

Would you swap for a set of steak knives in a presentation box? monkeyboy11 (52

) 9:27 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Did you get them off an infomercial of one of those door-to-door sales kids with a sportsbag full of exquisite treasures? 8:46 am, Thu 11 Jun

congradulations you almost made me hav an accident in my pants from al this laughing!!!!!!!! and im stil goin- AHAHAHAHHAHA the man! no1horsefreak (29

) 9:28 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I'm seriously going to look into the adult diapers thing. 8:46 am, Thu 11 Jun

Sheer Brilliance dude ... seriously nothing more needs to be said. Don't know what's scarier - the washing machine or the people who are bidding on it ... kiwigal070 (38

) 9:32 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Clowns with steel fangs are scarier than anything else. honestly try to think of one thing scarier than a clown with shiny steel fangs. 8:47 am, Thu 11 Jun

Your washing machine has been deviously busy.... it even has its own Facebook page with fans. http://www.facebook.com/home.php?ref=logo#/pages/Scary-washing-machine/89255828348?sid=9a075816 93ee5b18a31a9aeb3e434a1e&ref=search Maybe it is closer to world domination than you think? n8c (232

) 9:37 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Its sitting there so smugly too.... 8:48 am, Thu 11 Jun

Seller Comment: Part 1. FIRST OF ALL SORRY FOR WRITING IN CAPITALS. (I had to do that to get your attention its so noisey in here I can hardly think) I just stepped out of Trademe-land for a few hours, it's ok, i haven't been consumed by the infernal machine. Its actually sitting remarkably quietly. Weirdly quiet. The good news is I have decided to do some originals and auction them off. I think I'll make the auctions for charity. I am also working on another little scheme, more to be revealed later. 9:39 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Dude, do you have any idea what an awesome movie this would make? You should write a script and send it to Peter Jackson. I'm sure it'll be a blockbuster, since you've already gained world wide fame from this. I can't wait to see how much it goes for, it'll make history I'm sure! dori88 (74

) 9:40 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I'm up for whatever as long as they cast Natalie Portman in it somewhere. 8:49 am, Thu 11 Jun

Are you aware of the ancestry of this machine? We had a 300 series F&P in our flat back in the 70s that behaved suspiciously similar to this one. It would bounce off the walls of the laundry at times and would keep spinning with the lid open, but my flatmate stuck the end of the vaccuum cleaner hose in it while it was spinning once which munted the control knobs and made it hard to use after that. organix (647

) 9:41 pm, Wed 10 Jun

This ones strongest power is it's noise, it really only bounces around if there is an unbalanced load, careful arrangement of the washing can allow it to fully wind up and attain breathtaking rotational velocity. It seems to have 3 phases of wind-up at the end, the 3rd and final is where it gets weird. 8:53 am, Thu 11 Jun

Dude, Thanks so much for making my day!! You rock!! joel_a_n (18

) 9:41 pm, Wed 10 Jun

*bows graciously* 8:53 am, Thu 11 Jun

Just read about 200 Q&A's with 73 left to answer - I realise I am adding to your pain, but this is a marathon that you have to go through - are you feeling the Forrest Gump moment!!!!! Run Forrest Run! paulanchris (53

) 9:46 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Forests friend Bubba had a shrimp boat, I wish i had a friend with a shrimp boat then I could go shrimp fishing. 8:58 am, Thu 11 Jun

Seller Comment: Part 2. The bad news: I have 101 unanswered responses as of Wednesday the 10th of June 2140 hrs pacific Standard time. (Awesome I've always wanted to say that) It is with regret that I will not be able to answer all of your questions. If you get a dot like this---> . It doesn't mean I don't love you. Its pure logistics. I only have so many hours in the day and i am determined to make it through the full 10 days if Trademe's servers don't explode. 48 hours, 37238 hits and counting. 9:47 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Is that you Mike? I intentionally climbed into that vortex. I hope you are stuck with that washing machine forever and it takes you to the pits of hell. PS your son misses you. Or at least he did for the first few yrs. If I've got the wrong Mike, would you consider delivering it to the right one. vyxen (56

) 9:54 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Ummmm,...ok this is awkward. 9:13 am, Thu 11 Jun

I notice that you list "Your soul" under payment details. Does this mean I can swap my soul for the washing machine, or does it mean that if I buy it, it will eat my soul? Can you give me a 30 day guarantee that it wont eat my soul? krud1 (111

) 9:55 pm, Wed 10 Jun

If you can enter 'My Soul' into the bidding field then you are more than welcome to use it as currency. 9:14 am, Thu 11 Jun

waiuku... i like your style scottdabizz (13

) 9:56 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Uku hard. 9:14 am, Thu 11 Jun

if i win the Honda CRX Si turbo 1989 would you put this in the win :-) pickle5 (785

) 9:58 pm, Wed 10 Jun

You have to bid to win I'm afraid. 9:15 am, Thu 11 Jun

i will so pay u $20 for u to draw melissa_lee85 (134

) 10:05 pm, Wed 10 Jun

draw......what just draw? I don't know if I can agree to your terms, you must specify a start and stop time otherwise I could be being paid $20 to draw indefinitely. 9:16 am, Thu 11 Jun

Better still, if you can find my ex-Mike I will buy it for him. CASH vyxen (56

) 10:12 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I'm not doing your dirty laundry if thats what you're after. 9:17 am, Thu 11 Jun

Your talents are wasted here my friend. Go forth and write such great prose that the glorious light of your words shines upon the faces of the aimless souls of this world. dave_bullet (80

) 10:15 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Are you from a distant land? You talk weird. 9:18 am, Thu 11 Jun

Is this appliance fussy atall in who it deports from this dimension?? As in, will it eat mother-in-laws instead or just send them to any dimension that is as far away to this one as possible with no hope of returning..ever? I will swap you my very quiet, gentle, and often cuddly washing machine aswell as purchasing yours (well worth it)...I couldn't have both, I feel my machine and I have built a relationship of mutual respect and love, and think it unfair to subject it to such horror. girlvybz (139

) 10:22 pm, Wed 10 Jun

That is an immense sentence. One of the biggest i have ever seen. 9:19 am, Thu 11 Jun

Many thanks, for the evenings entertainment, its better than TV.lol! 1lady (655

) 10:23 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Well you're going to love TV tonight then... 9:19 am, Thu 11 Jun

hi if i bid and win and by some chance your wifes actualy makes it out of the vortex can you give me a agreement out of court that you would take her back as 1 wife in this house is enough BTW great auction think you should come to my party have a beer and show us how to type with our toes awsome man just awsome poor bubbles cbest (191

) 10:26 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Sure its a deal. Are you having one of those awesome unicorn themed parties like that other lady ^ up there somewhere? 9:22 am, Thu 11 Jun

Please don't anyone buy this washing machine - I need to come back to this page whenever I need a laugh :-) Isn't it wonderful? fatface2 (225

) 10:28 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Oh okay I'll just keep doing this forever if you want..... I'd rather get taken by the washing machine. At least the dinosaurs wont have 59 unanswered questions. 9:25 am, Thu 11 Jun

Mate thats nothing, My washing machine ate the flippin cow, http://img.metro.co.uk/i/pix/2008/08b/cowhead_450x300.jpg dutchygal (64

) 10:40 pm, Wed 10 Jun

How odd. Didn't quite get all of it though did it. Who won in the end? i wonder what the cow is looking at, probably volcanos and pterodactyls. 9:26 am, Thu 11 Jun

www.youtube.com/lowintegra lowintegra (173

) 10:44 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Are you John Campbell? 9:27 am, Thu 11 Jun

Brillant, best sales pitch I ever heard. My man is an appliance fix it guy and even he is scared to touch it, seems he has a memory of one just like this he doesnt want to speak of!!!!! sezzle (116

) 10:47 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Yeah he'll be the guy that ran screaming and left his tool behind. tell him i've used his wire cutters heaps, they are really good ones. 9:28 am, Thu 11 Jun

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!ATTENTION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I have 3 shade's of green felt tip pens for your hobby of drawing at home and would be more then happy to make up a "buy now" for you, Or maybe even a trade for your washing machine cash my way...???? We both know the red does not fit in your dinosaur masterpiece. your reply would be much appreciated. cheers b_unit1 (9

) 10:48 pm, Wed 10 Jun

But dinosaurs are all the same shade of green. I think red looks fine, know one really knows what colour dinosaurs were anyway. They might have been more aubergine or eggplant. 9:29 am, Thu 11 Jun

Your machine is probably distantly related to the god Thor (who occasionally appears, theophanises? as a Soft Drink Dispenser). At least I think that was what Douglas Adams reported. Check for thunderbolts. misty1961 (202

) 10:50 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I once met a man from Norway who's name was 'Magnus son of Thor' that was his actual name. He didn't really look like his name suggests. He challenged me to an arm wrestle and I wasted him. Maybe it wasn't his real name. 9:33 am, Thu 11 Jun

Putting your number online may not have been smart. Its a real number. People will call it. Perhaps even Icelandic people !!! Be smart bucda397 (29

) 10:50 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Duly noted kind sir, hmm so thats why I have been so tied up. I was seriously considering tying my phone to a seagull and kissing it goodbye. 7:17 pm, Thu 11 Jun

I think I just fell in love with you. I was actually close to ROFLing. Not only is this listing HILARIOUS but you're like, funny. In your responses and everything. You're an amazing human being. Unlike them dinosaurs.. nip. (78

) 10:58 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Is ROLFing what I think it is? I hope you used a sick bag or the hoodie of the person in front of you. 7:24 pm, Thu 11 Jun

Doesnt it piss u off that all these people are annoying you? leave the poor man alone! looks like im getting this washing machine cheap, there are more people asking stupid questions than people bidding! csp59 (242

) 11:01 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Do you prefer Venetian Blinds or Curtains? Venetian blinds do not come from Venice they come from Japan and were first patented in England. 7:29 pm, Thu 11 Jun

Hi it's Hadyn Jones from one news here. Would love to come see the offending washing machine and have a chuckle with the owner. You can contact me at hadyn.jones(at)tvnz.co.nz or at 021 44676four. Would love to tell this story. Cheers hadyn drhummer (60

) 11:02 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Guess I should have read this earlier....meh 7:30 pm, Thu 11 Jun

How do you think it would go as a cocktail shaker? cestimo (6

) 11:03 pm, Wed 10 Jun

If you are planning to make a 5.5kg cocktail I want in. We must lay down ground rules though. Tequila good. Yaegermeister bad. That will be all. 7:34 pm, Thu 11 Jun

Epic Mike! One of your H2B creations gone wrong bro? cheeky.kiwi (41

) 11:06 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Is that some sort of Hydrogen/Boron amalgamate? 7:35 pm, Thu 11 Jun

about that pinball machine/tesla coil, it was a school science fair project (jeez they don't let you do stuff like that anymore!) in a 'normal' pinball machine. The back scoreboard part was hacked off the machine and the coil inserted there. Was hell on the power bill, too. Nobody wanted to get close enough to try running around in it, even if it was big enough, which it wasn't, because it had a tendancy to shoot out some pretty impressive lightning type bolts. plastic8 (309

) 11:07 pm, Wed 10 Jun

They let you run a Telsa coil at a school fair? Where are you from? Why did I not go to your school? At Waiuku college we were allowed to play tennis. I played an entire tennis tournament in bare feet once and will never do it again. 7:37 pm, Thu 11 Jun

woohoo! loving your auction, spirit and sense of humour. am not so sure about the washing machine however i wish you well with your auction :-) gigi31 (46

) 11:07 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Do you think Pascall should make fanta bottle lollies as well as coke bottles? I think they would be a big hit. 7:39 pm, Thu 11 Jun

I had an old F&P machine like yours, had a hell of spin cycle on it, would shake rattle and roll. I found quite by accident I might add, one day that banging the misus on the beast while it was mid spin real got us both off in spectacular fashion. Alas that machine died and Im thinking yours might do the trick again. Not sure about the dinosaurs coping a peak tho of my man bits. But the misus seems keen on the caveman aspect. Do you think with an invite we could get 1 down for a 3way ?? 2get1 (130

) 11:13 pm, Wed 10 Jun

You are carrying bits of a man around? What bits? And who was it? I hope the were Icelandic. 7:41 pm, Thu 11 Jun

omg! looks like i'm not the only one with the evil machine. its multiplying! butt_plugs (68

) 11:13 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Maybe they've just been hanging out? Maybe my washing machine is like the kid on the block that you don't want your kid to hang out with. 7:47 pm, Thu 11 Jun

You're not very brave, are you? Leaving your poor wife stuck with the dinosaurs and an iron. What is she gonna do with an iron? Plug it into a dinosaurs bottom and burn her way out of that dimension and back into this one? Maybe you should send her a note to do just that. You should be rescuing her, for shame! You're not afraid that some handsome cavemen like from the Lynx ad. will sweep her up on his white mammoth and carry her off into the sunset? saphire110 (7

) 11:22 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I have both science and commonsense on my side though. Science says cavemen weren't around in the Jurassic period and common sense says that those cave men on the Lynx ad are unfeasably good looking and close shaven for obsidian knives. 7:54 pm, Thu 11 Jun

You rock my socks! cs.design (108

) 11:23 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Can you please express your happiness with a cool and unique dance? 7:55 pm, Thu 11 Jun

Aw shucks Mike - You're gonna be sorry man - you might actually miss this monster .... I once had a similar machine .... every day it yelled and screamed when I left home and it shimmied out of its 'space' and greeted me at the door when I came home from work like a long lost friend (sometimes locking itself in) .... aaaah I still miss it :) lady-lene (532

) 11:24 pm, Wed 10 Jun

I might miss it like an outpatient misses their recently removed massive hideous tumor. 7:58 pm, Thu 11 Jun

You know Mike Loder?! I met him at NYDS back in '06, when I helped tutor the circus class. Great guy. I know why he can't do stand-up, so I got that joke. Next year I might suggest the theme for circus is "scary washing machine opens worm hole and reveals dinosaurs". Great idea that, would really suck the audience in I think. knic046 (10

) 11:26 pm, Wed 10 Jun

You went to Circus school!!, Awesome! I had a friend called Rossco who wanted to go to circus school, but he didn't which was disappointing for all of us. The only thing that worries me about circuses are clowns. Especially the ones with steel fangs. 8:01 pm, Thu 11 Jun

shall i pray for your amp? daniel_martin (73

) 11:31 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Wow this is possibly the most obscure yet. I don't actually own an amp, but I do have an electric guitar that I made myself out of a piece of wood. 8:02 pm, Thu 11 Jun

Don't you realise that this is the kill and destroy model? Look at the name - KELVINATOR - it's the next model down from the TERMINATOR. studio1 (551

) 11:41 pm, Wed 10 Jun

So you're saying Skynet was up and active the same year Terminator 1 screened? I thought I had the whole plot sorted, guess i'd better rethink. 8:09 pm, Thu 11 Jun

Sell this to the museum. envious_sins (80

) 11:42 pm, Wed 10 Jun

That one in amsterdam might like it. You know the one. 8:11 pm, Thu 11 Jun

kelvin ate her longsocks (55

) 11:48 pm, Wed 10 Jun

Brilliant, all this time it's been staring me in the face and I haven't spotted it. I could have foreseen the whole event right from the beginning. 8:13 pm, Thu 11 Jun

Hi there Mike, if I got plastic surgery so I achived a striking resemblence to Natalie Portman so much so that your long lost wife would never be able to tell the difference, and legally changed my name to Natalie Portman would you agree to marry me? If so I will buy the possesed machine from you and we can light a bon fire and burn it at the stake, like they did in the old days with witches.. Let me know soon though as I am currently engaged to be married to someone else... -Tory dannyboy42 (12

) 12:03 am, Thu 11 Jun

It would have to be rather striking. I have quite a collection on Natalie Portman paraphernalia which I can use to compare you against. Even a really big one which focuses in on her lack of imperfections. 8:32 pm, Thu 11 Jun

I was at Births, Deaths and Marriages today and there was a very long queue of women asking for forms to change their names by deed poll. I was so surprised I asked the registrar was this normal. He said no it wasn't, there had just been a sudden and baffling influx of women wanting to change their names to Natalie Portman. majoba (40

) 12:05 am, Thu 11 Jun

Great the world needs many many more of her. 8:32 pm, Thu 11 Jun

Noooo! You must keep this! It should be put into a museum, so when the Romulans come, Captain Kirk can use it and save Vulcan! comrie (78

) 12:15 am, Thu 11 Jun

You are talking to an avid Starwars fan here. 8:36 pm, Thu 11 Jun

Who are you voting for in the Mt Albert by-election? ashleysempire (158

) 12:26 am, Thu 11 Jun

I'd like to say Triceratops but..... i have just recently found out that National's plan has been nicknamed by the opposition as, wait for it.......wait for it....wait for it....wait for it....wait for it....wait for it....wait for it....wait for it....wait for it....wait for it....wait for it....wait for it....wait for it....wait for it....wait for it....wait for it..The DINOSAUR plan! I know I can hardly believe it myself. So naturally I am going to have to say National. whatever his name is. 8:44 pm, Thu 11 Jun

I read some of your comments to my goldfish and thought they would horrified with the harness and toasting. I discovered my fish are deaf, I think I had them too close to the washing machine. UPDATE they are not deaf, they only understand Icelandic. Who Knew.... smoocher (1042

) 12:56 am, Thu 11 Jun

I'll let you in on a secret, goldfish are superb lip readers. Its because they have barely any control over their own lips and their jealousy drove them to intense study. 8:45 pm, Thu 11 Jun

I have a vegetable sculpture certificate too (from the 80s) - maybe we could go into business together making dinosaur vegie sculptures? We could make a fortune!!! rainbowbritenz (91

) 1:04 am, Thu 11 Jun

You should put it on trade me and start a viral campaign, everyones doing it. 8:46 pm, Thu 11 Jun

I am curious as to whether your hatred of the Icelandic extends to the Eskimo lollies? bonnie_lass (35

) 1:07 am, Thu 11 Jun

I have hated Eskimo lollies since my first christmas when Nana put a damn eskimo lolly in my mouth thinking they would be good because I was teething. I had never encountered such an assault on the senses Despite the natural weak spot on the top of my skull I head-butted her in the face and spat it on the rug. It cost me the symmetricality of the skull enjoyed by most people but I'm still glad I did it. I learned to love Nana again because after that she gave me spearmint oddfellows. 8:54 pm, Thu 11 Jun

Seller Comment: Seller added 4 photos 1:25 am, Thu 11 Jun

Seller Comment: New dinosaurs added, I'm especially pleased with how the Shark and the Undertaker came out. I had to suck the end of my green felt-pen to get it to go the distance, only just made it with a little colour substitution along the way. 1:30 am, Thu 11 Jun

I have a dishwasher like that. I Tasered it and since then it has been tame(ish) (www.taser.com). Call the cops and they will pleased to Taser your beast FOC. cap763 (11

) 1:43 am, Thu 11 Jun

I do not want a taser near my beast thank you. Any of them, the triceratops, the diplodicus, any of them. 8:55 pm, Thu 11 Jun

If you give me your username and password and credit card number I would be happy to help you answer all your questions chrob (148

) 2:01 am, Thu 11 Jun

Are from Iceland? They don't have computers in Iceland. Hows the polar bear training going, have you got them to hold the guns yet? Just curious. 8:56 pm, Thu 11 Jun

I have 4 exams next week (last year of uni).. and i have stayed up till 2am reading ALL (yes i really mean all) questions and answers. I also have work at 8:30am wth a late (maybe midnight) night of study ahead.... i felt you should know. jay2jay (269

) 2:05 am, Thu 11 Jun

Thanks, I'm deeply concerned for your academic future. 8:57 pm, Thu 11 Jun

Did you see any velociraptors? They are my favourite dinosaur riotgirlbass (57

) 2:28 am, Thu 11 Jun

You know what? i didn't.... And before Jurrassic Park I don't even think they existed. I think they have been implanted in our consciousness by people with over active imaginations. i hate people like that, always making stuff up... 9:00 pm, Thu 11 Jun

Sorry I don't need a washing machine, but a giant UFO crashed in my backyard last week and i think I can get it running again, except the anti gravity engine has burned out. Do you know if any parts on your washing machine would be inter-changable with my UFO's engine ? simplysi (20

) 2:48 am, Thu 11 Jun

You must have a massive back yard. Even a normal UFO is pretty big. I dont even have a backyard, I have a steep bank with weeds growing out of it. There are three yukka palms in there somewhere. And a LOT of bottle caps. 9:04 pm, Thu 11 Jun

I've been in mourning since Douglas Adams died, but now there's hope, perhaps you can do the sequel to The Salmon of Doubt. Heck you're already in your bathrobe so you're appropriately dressed. But unlike Arthur Dent you probably don't know where any of your towels are because they've been sucked into the vortex. After my mum died we found 12 dead irons in the hot water cupboard (true story!) so I suspect your machine may be responsible. No sign of your wife though. giz49 (13

) 3:56 am, Thu 11 Jun

No they aren't in the vortex, i velcro'd them to the bathroom wall remember. 9:06 pm, Thu 11 Jun

Could you please record the sound and post a sound file. Preferably when you are washing a duvet. Thanks happy_hedghog11 (24

) 4:12 am, Thu 11 Jun

I already washed my duvet after my stag do. Want to buy a mattress? It smells like Savignon Blanc 9:07 pm, Thu 11 Jun

This auction has become an international legend, Q&A and all! Makes me proud to be a kiwi and an Aucklander. You should definitely have a blog somewhere - I'd read it! Pulled a muscle laughing. fizz_of_nz (5

) 4:12 am, Thu 11 Jun

This IS my blog. I really like the fact that it's temporary. 9:08 pm, Thu 11 Jun

Lmfao, you sound like a Mike I know, how many funny Mike's are there in Auckland? Best read I've had since the last Mike sent me a story, I'll be laughing about this for the rest of the day. shells1980 (82

) 6:30 am, Thu 11 Jun

I googled it and nothing came up sorry. But I did find out that Mike Donaldson is a life member of the Auckland Studio of Potters which is interesting. 9:11 pm, Thu 11 Jun

This is just what i am looking for would this bring me back would you mine if i use it in my backing band when i return. cheers elvis 221 elvis221 (26

) 7:33 am, Thu 11 Jun

Ok Elvis you need to dabble in a little punctuation from time to time it can really improve your cohesiveness. Good luck with the band. 9:18 pm, Thu 11 Jun

My former (45 year old) flatmate's washing machine was known affectionately as "Mark's Medievil (sic) Meditation Box" because it was just the outisde metal shell of the washing machine & he used to get inside it & meditate, sitting cross-legged. My other flatmate had a joke - Q: "what's the four most evil things you can get in a room?" A: "Mark, Peter, their two carrots, & Mark's Medievil Meditation Box" (that's FIVE things, get it? we used to laugh and laugh...) PS can you draw eagles, too? wordhappy (62

) 7:34 am, Thu 11 Jun

Hippies have always worried me. The most worrying thing is i sense from you that this is based on true events though probably embellished like every good story should be. I would certainly like to try, I have a lot of respect for eagles because they are protectors of man (Icelanders are not real people) 9:21 pm, Thu 11 Jun

I hope this makes close up next. now how do we let Mark Sainsbury know? I'll work on that one for you, my treat as your've made my week!:) bikewrench (26

) 7:53 am, Thu 11 Jun

The bearded man came to see me at 1pm today. What a pleasant fellow he was, we chortled and chortled over such things as life, death, imortality... he truely was wise as the beard suggests. I think he deserves more credit, is there a Mark Sainsbury appreciation page on facebook? If not I bet there is ...........................now. 9:24 pm, Thu 11 Jun

You remind me of Craig the weird Australian lampost guy. I wonder if his teleporter is washing machine based? Do you know? samleigh (136

) 8:13 am, Thu 11 Jun

Lamp post guy? Did he recently have a stag party too? 9:25 pm, Thu 11 Jun

I'm thinking of buying this for my mother-in-law, it would fit perfectly into her garage.........next to where she parks her broom! steve0508 (150

) 8:14 am, Thu 11 Jun

Oh I get it, you are making reference towards the fact that your father-in-law is into home carpentry, he leaves a lot of saw dust on the garage floor and she is an impulsive cleaner so keeps the broom close at hand. 9:36 pm, Thu 11 Jun

hey mike, i think you might be lying about the whole seeing the dinosaurs through the portal thing (or perhaps you just mis-identified them) as i am sure everyone knows by now that it was Baldrick's underpants killed all the dinosaurs. smoketones (4028

) 8:15 am, Thu 11 Jun

Oh I'm not denying any of that, it's all true, every bit. Half the scientists know it was sharks that ate the dinosaurs but the other half of them, equally respected, know it was in fact Baldrick's underpants. Luckily, the portal opened to a time before Baldrick visited, if I had opened the portal at the same time or after, I might not have made it through. I also thought recently it may have been his underpants that bought the washing machine to open the portal by the sheer need to wash them. 9:42 pm, Thu 11 Jun

I think it might be possessed. I can come and do a spiritual cleansing on your washing machine for a small fee pantsmcgee (9

) 8:28 am, Thu 11 Jun

Pretty sure it's just the main bearings. It'll fix right up in no time. Would i make a good car salesman? 9:44 pm, Thu 11 Jun

do you think you could do a raptor picture and write ZIPTIED on it? you are becoming world famous lol tomo124 (44

) 8:32 am, Thu 11 Jun

I'm against Raptors because I'm pretty sure Speilberg made them up. He's very good at making fictional characters get close to our hearts. Like E.T. Man that little guy,... I just want to give him a noogie. 9:47 pm, Thu 11 Jun

i've sent your trademe link to my friend who is a presenter on radio Hauraki... you deserve some press! stay tuned. turn your radio up and keep it away from your washing machine echo55 (158

) 8:36 am, Thu 11 Jun

I live in Waterview, there is no radio reception here. Every time I send an email or answer one of these questions i have to walk outside and touch a coathanger on the wireless card. I heard a rumor we are getting a shop next year. 9:50 pm, Thu 11 Jun

Could you please call me 021 023 27 348 jamieprice (12

) 8:52 am, Thu 11 Jun

Hmmmn, i sense a trick here....I might use my flat-mates phone when they are in the shower. 9:51 pm, Thu 11 Jun

Thanks, I have tears rolling down my face, best laugh for yonks, I had a junior version so can relate slightly. Good luck!! buzzzs (20

) 8:53 am, Thu 11 Jun

Are you a midget? I'm curious, where do midgets (or little people if thats what you prefer to be called) buy their clothes from because I've been looking everywhere for a midget store. I want a miniature tuxedo as a conversation starter. I've asked Jimmy but he's no where near small enough. 9:57 pm, Thu 11 Jun

And The Kelvinator said "HASTA LA VISTA, BABY, I'LL BE BACK! Sorry mate, you'll never get rid of it. 20 years, it'll be back:( bikewrench (26

) 8:54 am, Thu 11 Jun

It cant swim, I have the upper hand. I'm not a great swimmer but I can kind of wiggle in a direction. No specific direction but still a direction and that's a big one-up on the Kelvinator. 9:59 pm, Thu 11 Jun

what a mean machine! don't sell! Its going to become famous. domo2 (127

) 8:58 am, Thu 11 Jun

I think you may have missed the fact that it's becoming famous because I am selling it. Why do headphone say L and R on each ear? Does it really matter? Its not like the music will play inside out. 10:01 pm, Thu 11 Jun

The NZD DATING SITE WANT YOU ON THEIR MESSAGEBOARDS. Seems you have a following! Thanks for the laugh. artyanne (419

) 9:00 am, Thu 11 Jun

Oh awesome I have always wanted to go dating? Where will it be? I heard Dates grow in all sorts of exotic locations. I saw a man shoot a naughty monkey with a blow dart. He was a Date farmer. I hope we don't get shot with blow darts. Does he know we will be taking his dates? 10:05 pm, Thu 11 Jun

Hi. What OS is this thing running? It seems like one of those unstable ones which requires contant patching and plenty of service packs ? DVT says "If it can run Exchange 2010 and can SAN attach then we will take it !". I need to know how much for shipping to Nelson - or can it get here by itself ? mwat1 (80

) 9:04 am, Thu 11 Jun

I'm going to say......yes.....? 10:06 pm, Thu 11 Jun

Hi..can you give me a ring on zero two one seven eight two two seven five.. i'm a reporter from campbell live at tv3.... we would love to do a story on your washing machine! tony488 (0

) 9:08 am, Thu 11 Jun

Oh i bet you would, i bet John's seen my other car auctions and he wants to come around and do a burnout outside my house. 10:08 pm, Thu 11 Jun

Every year bro, every year :D email me! I look forward to being added :) t4n1th (216

) 9:14 am, Thu 11 Jun

You are very persuasive....are you going to sell me an insurance policy? 9:21 am, Thu 11 Jun

My girlfriend is Icelandic (her account) and wants you to know they don't club baby seals there, but that its Norway. If that wasn't bad enough they also get the blame for A-HA. By the way she says she is willing to sell my soul for the washing machine if you stop giving people bad Icelandic lessons. sara-birgis (14

) 9:24 am, Thu 11 Jun

Oh dude I'm so sorry...how did you let that happen?.... what are you going to do about this? 10:16 pm, Thu 11 Jun

I think I just fell in love with you a little bit. imnotanaddict (33

) 9:29 am, Thu 11 Jun

I found out if I warm my green felt under the halogen lamp it gets even dryer. 10:17 pm, Thu 11 Jun

dude is the pull of this machine enough to ripp this recession john4sure (49

) 9:31 am, Thu 11 Jun

Right out of the hole!!! 10:17 pm, Thu 11 Jun

Hey mate can you post a video of it operating on youtube. Im 99% sure i dont want to buy it, but theres always that 1% chance. Also can you tell me if the shark had drawn to scale as it would clarify one of lifes mysteries. Ledgendary listn! redroady5 (447

) 9:32 am, Thu 11 Jun

I admire your honesty. I'm pretty certain the shark is exact scale. 10:18 pm, Thu 11 Jun

OMG this is my old one!!!!! it once aponna time done that port hole thing... next thing it dissapaired oi! yup just gone! glad ta see its still out there fuckn the naighba hoods off! Miss u washn portal machine! yeoman (53

) 9:32 am, Thu 11 Jun

Oh dear oh dear oh dear. 10:20 pm, Thu 11 Jun

What's the going rate to 'dump' one of these monsters at the local 'tip'? your auction has done well, you don't have to pay to dispose of the demon, you were sooo clever auctioning it off . Well done, and thankyou for all the laughs over the past few days. (mrs) buckyboy (128

) 9:32 am, Thu 11 Jun

I would not leave this thing unattended for any longer than it takes an Icelandic to sneak off with it. I've seen them at the dump before just snooping around, I don't even know why. 10:22 pm, Thu 11 Jun

I've sent this to my friends in England, your going international. Funniest thing I've read in ages beckytucker (3

) 9:33 am, Thu 11 Jun

I'll deliver it personally if you will kindly pay for my airfare. Can we go via Iceland i just want to fly over and see if the whole gun-carrying polar bears thing is actually true. 10:24 pm, Thu 11 Jun

Are you aware that natalie portman is also a partime badass rapper? Check out the lonely island album and then maybe your opinion of this lass will not be as high bushginga (27

) 9:35 am, Thu 11 Jun

la la la la I'm not listening. 10:24 pm, Thu 11 Jun

You should get in contact with the team in the UK from Primeval (http://www.itv.com/primeval ) They are very experienced in dealing with anomalies and dinosaurs. So should you turn on the machine and see another vortex you will be fine. keylev (101

) 9:39 am, Thu 11 Jun

I bet their jobs are shaky in this climate. Its a very fickle industry at the best of times. 10:26 pm, Thu 11 Jun

You didn't think to take a DNA sample from the dinosaurs did you? That sort of thing would be of huge scientific importance you know. You could probably have sold dinosaur DNA for much more than $99.99. This auction is awesome by the way :) wally-d319 (52

) 9:43 am, Thu 11 Jun

For heavens sake think about what you just said. I was hanging on for my life to a deepfreeze which has very few handles and is mostly coated in a rather slippery and featureless enameled surface. How I would be able to take one hand off, peel back a DNA slide, continue holding both the DNA slide and the cotton swab with out contamination and then take a sample from a T-rex's tongue, whilst avoiding the gnashing teeth, then wipe it across the slide, I do not know. 10:35 pm, Thu 11 Jun

Have you thought to contact Fisher & Paykel... this could be the profit recovery program they need to keep solvent. The new line of Extreme Demonic Washers... they would start the economic recovery of NZ with cloning this..... renegade1969 (126

) 9:46 am, Thu 11 Jun

There is probably some fine print in the owners manual that states they still own it, wouldn't surprise me. 10:36 pm, Thu 11 Jun

hey! sandringham is not in a different hemiphere than waterview. i tried putting my iron on top of my late 80's scary kelvinator during the final spin cycle to try to generate some sort of time paradox, but so far no result:( the iron is a phillips though, is the brand conflict the cause of my negative outcome? I'm serious though if you want the iron it's yours, comes with a small brown stain on the base - origin unknown... mattone2 (61

) 9:48 am, Thu 11 Jun

Yeah, my iron was a Tiffany. What kind of brand is that? Maybe it was a trick? 10:37 pm, Thu 11 Jun

Don't you think you should do the world a favour and put this out on the inorganic collection heap? ;) mdi (310

) 9:51 am, Thu 11 Jun

No we've covered this before, it can not be allowed to fall into the wrong hands, I will be strongly vetting the new owner, liek the SPCA does, I have already worked out the interview questions. 10:39 pm, Thu 11 Jun

had a huge out burst of laugher in my office cube.....great work 22384 (19

) 9:53 am, Thu 11 Jun

What's it like in your office? I have a desk made out of an old door. i had to saw the top off to fit. I wish they made shorter doors. 10:40 pm, Thu 11 Jun

I understand your pain, I once had an alarm clock that would flick backwards and forwards in time. The first few time travels were brilliant. But them it would take me to places and blink words on to it's screen telling me to kill people - such as queen victoria. And when I refused it turned all of my appliances against me, The blender tried to eat my hand and the TV tried to trap my inside survivor. This was all 5 years ago. Today is the first time I have used technology in years. sme1s_angel (31

) 9:54 am, Thu 11 Jun

I used technology today. I wrote something on the interweb. Your alarm clock must have had an extraordinarily long screen. 10:43 pm, Thu 11 Jun

As it has been a teriffying time for u with the beast unleashing hell on u, would u be considering writting an autobiography about the events u have encountered with ur washing machine and any other possesed machinery? i think u would be in for selling it on here as so many of us have enjoyed your accounts of adventure and danger(at your expence unfortunatly),hope u will consider it!! minxie5 (47

) 9:54 am, Thu 11 Jun

I read an autobiography once, we had to for 4th form English, it put me off for life. 10:44 pm, Thu 11 Jun

haha I also grew up in Waiuku and theres definately ALOT of cavemen there!!! Good luck with this its by far the funniest thing ive read for ages! jkjc1 (879

) 10:00 am, Thu 11 Jun

Have you met the one called Bryan? he's weird. 10:45 pm, Thu 11 Jun

I like your pictures :) jan_on_ice (884

) 10:02 am, Thu 11 Jun

I like octopus's, they can fit through tiny holes like that yellow guy on X-files who eats livers and lives in a giant spitball. 10:47 pm, Thu 11 Jun

Hi Mike, it has come to my attention that this washing machine looks very familiar. I believe your father and maybe you stayed at our bach at Whitianga a couple of years ago. I don't recall seeing our washing machine since, which obviously is a good thing. It is terrible what you have gone thru. You have done us a huge favour. Lol. It sounds like your secretly love your washing machine and im sure you will be devastated when you do finally sell. As we were when ours went missing. Hahaha topcat27 (44

) 10:03 am, Thu 11 Jun

Ok I'm going to say......no? Mind you generally the only time I am in Whitianga it is a seasonal event and I am rather intoxicated. If i did happen to, by some infintessimally small chance, happen to be drunk, in Whitianga, with my Dad, AND we stole a washing machine it must have been one hell of a good night and I'm glad you could be part of it. 10:52 pm, Thu 11 Jun

Hi dude, my son is turning four soon and he would really like one of your dino drawings.How to go about this ?I'm to scared to bid on the washing machine. bh1007 (134

) 10:06 am, Thu 11 Jun

Well you can take a shot at any of the charity auctions, or you could get him a t-shirt. I hear a rumor MrVintage may be offering child's sizes soon... 10:53 pm, Thu 11 Jun

I'm very interested in these gangster themed hot glue runs mentioned above, do you have a working prototype and if I ever get the chance to use one do you have to be listening to Notorious B.I.G. when using it? timma1 (47

) 10:08 am, Thu 11 Jun

Pretty much any thing other than Bjork, her music has frequencies that machines respond to and the glue gun may start to behave erratically. Thats how i glued my eyebrows together. 10:55 pm, Thu 11 Jun

We're ROFL'ing over at www.thelastpost.co.nz. We'd love to have you as a member, please do drop by and visit...! misternaki (273

) 10:11 am, Thu 11 Jun

Hello Grumpy..... :) 11:01 pm, Thu 11 Jun

Ha ha ha I live in Waterview too and think i just may have heard such noises from my house!!!! badsvn2000 (168

) 10:15 am, Thu 11 Jun

Where...exactly do you live in Waterview? There are quite a few weird noises in this neighbourhood. I'm sure I heard tribal drums and marching soldiers the other night and I'm pretty sure I saw a wombat. 11:04 pm, Thu 11 Jun

I like dinosaurs... and washing machines.....but mostly dinosaurs as they are cool. Washing machines are cool too, but just not as cool as dinosaurs. herbert13 (1

) 10:16 am, Thu 11 Jun

I've never really liked washing machines, for the same reason I don't really like toilets. But they are a necessity with out a washing machine you will smell like the boy from Awhitu who has goats in his house. 11:07 pm, Thu 11 Jun

Will you sell your dinosaur pictures? I will buy them. shanek2 (35

) 10:26 am, Thu 11 Jun

I'm pretty behind in my homework here it seems. i am feilding these things as fast as I can and the number is not dropping. You know what this is like, it's like that soccer game in Argentina where the crowd found they could cook the referee by reflecting the sun with their silver backed program cards. Yeah he died. 11:10 pm, Thu 11 Jun

are you single?? you are HILARIOUS!!! ps am HOT usainc (598

) 10:28 am, Thu 11 Jun

And confident too :) 11:11 pm, Thu 11 Jun

LOL<.. My gosh you grack me OFF mate,... Good foryou DOUGLAS,.. CAN YOU MACHINE DO BERMS,... GETA BERM MAN,..LOL,.. NICE ONE,..ANDGOOD LUCK FOR THE AUCTION.. YOU CAN DO WIT. amigoz_no1 (6

) 10:28 am, Thu 11 Jun

Um yeah its actually PERM. Its short for permanent which is the opposite to temporary. 11:14 pm, Thu 11 Jun

i would love to know how ur cinderella would of ended... queenb20 (56

) 10:30 am, Thu 11 Jun

Yeah she died in a pumpkin accident just after midnight because she was speeding, there was pumpkin everywhere. Mind you it was a pretty big pumpkin and it fed the villagers for several weeks. 11:15 pm, Thu 11 Jun

That is hilarious!! Well done. It has brought back memories of when I had a similar washing machine a few years ago. I used to have the backdoor open when washing and I am sure the neighbours were close to calling noise control! Also, do you know if the dinosaurs breath fire (a bit like a dragon)? This might be a bit of a bonus in these cold winter months! One appliance - two jobs...? Heater/dryer Thanks for the entertainment! mickeymouse4 (5

) 10:30 am, Thu 11 Jun

Nah the only thing i saw coming out of it's mouth was an odour akin to maggoty goat's cheese soaked in warm gerkin juice. Yeah i actually saw the smell because it was very thick and also due to my fear I had heightened senses. 11:18 pm, Thu 11 Jun

wow your page on a runaway washing machine has had more views than the sign on campaign for runaway climate change, interesting to see what gets people going! interesting to see where priorities lie.. but then again, this washing machine could be part of the solution, we could suck all humanity back to the dinosaur era hence, have another shot at not messing things up. espie (61

) 10:34 am, Thu 11 Jun

You'd be pleasantly surprised I think to see what else I've been working on to help you with the problem. www.greenwave.org.nz Chin up, it'll be ok. 11:25 pm, Thu 11 Jun

Can i go in the the worp hole to find your wife and if i do can i have to machine for free? or ill take ur wife... which ever you ind easyer to let go... easterchock (3

) 10:35 am, Thu 11 Jun

Yeah... probably should have proof-read that..... 11:26 pm, Thu 11 Jun

8===D hark1 (38

) 10:40 am, Thu 11 Jun

Oh i get it it's a snowman being pulled along by an umbrella so fast that his head has fallen off. His arms are stretched too, they must have stuck them in well. Can you use glue on snow? I'm pretty sure you cant. I wonder how the Icelanders stick their snow houses together, they probably use liquified baby seals. 11:28 pm, Thu 11 Jun

Thankyou so much everyone for the best read and laugh I've had in ages ; including the Dark Ages . I do hope you put all of these Q& A into Book form ,it would be brilliant for sure . trinity-lee (33

) 11:04 am, Thu 11 Jun

What about the saus-age? ha ha get it?, its like stone-age and ice-age but its a sausage which isn't even an age but sounds like one ha ha. 11:30 pm, Thu 11 Jun

Your dinosaurs are way too derivative. They look more like they were copied from the 1979 annual of "Victor Book for Boys - Jurassic edition". The diplodocus is a dead ringer. obiwan128 (21

) 11:04 am, Thu 11 Jun

Maybe if I used my toes? 11:31 pm, Thu 11 Jun

My mate Marty McFly just text, he reckons he could take it in his Delorian with the dual flux capacitor.....what say you? guppy11 (39

) 11:05 am, Thu 11 Jun

The old Flux Capacitor joke. Man thats got to be hollywood's second most famous invention after the Hyperdrive. 11:32 pm, Thu 11 Jun

Your shark pictures look a lot like Sharky Bartholomew Sharkdog the 3rd. Google it and Eek the Cat if you don't know this critter. coobird (14

) 11:23 am, Thu 11 Jun

I always thought Sharky the sharkdog looked more like a missile than either a dog or a shark. 11:34 pm, Thu 11 Jun

I once had a Pantodon Butterfly Fish (sounds like a dinosaur; but its not one, though it did look prehistoric), it jumped up and hit its head on the tank lid (a type of flying fish you see) and died. If I had secured it to the piece of petrified wood (silicates forming in the cells of old wood; not scared wood) that I had in the tank, this would not have happened. Would your twine that attached so well to your fish have worked in the afformentioned scenario? One word, CRAYONS, do you think? krazee42 (12

) 11:27 am, Thu 11 Jun

How long is your piece of string? 11:35 pm, Thu 11 Jun

you're a fucking legend. lukemcgill (8

) 11:28 am, Thu 11 Jun

You said a potty word. 11:35 pm, Thu 11 Jun

Haha - cool I find myself checking your page every few hours to waste time at work... Totally impressed with your dino drawings, can you please draw a picture of the porthole to the other dimension? I'm interested to see what it looks like. debs255 (37

) 11:34 am, Thu 11 Jun

I tried and I cant get it, I'll keep trying. It looks like a flower every time. 11:36 pm, Thu 11 Jun

Does it come with it's own malevolent spirit? I'm not sure if F&P make them with those anymore... philboorman (36

) 11:43 am, Thu 11 Jun

It did have one but he was old and he didn't liek the noise so he bailed, left a note of the fridge saying cheers for the socks. 11:37 pm, Thu 11 Jun

What sort of pens are you using for you dinosaurs? i have been looking for good pens as mine run out after 2 days of dinosaurs drawing and I have to give them to my son. He does think this is fair but I have explained that I am an adult and that makes it fair. herbert13 (1

) 11:51 am, Thu 11 Jun

You should probably move on to barbies, drawing dinosaurs as a grown adult is childish and frankly a bit weird. 11:38 pm, Thu 11 Jun

I'm a research Physicist at Massey University and I'm wondering if you know whether this tool opens a pathway to the past or just to a specific parallel universe? By the sounds of it it is random but if the beast possesses awareness (like Skynet) it could be trying to send you somewhere specific. I feel this could make a very good PhD project for my students... tornus (32

) 11:52 am, Thu 11 Jun

You lost me at I'm. 11:40 pm, Thu 11 Jun

LOVE IT!!!!!! Lmao my tummy hurts from reading this, your my new hero! Good luck relieving yourself of the damned piece of portal hell equipment! Hahahahahahaha bloody legend! embear (10

) 11:54 am, Thu 11 Jun

Maybe you have a viral infection of the lower intestine. It can often lead to flatulence. 11:41 pm, Thu 11 Jun

Brilliant!!!!! michbath (34

) 12:03 pm, Thu 11 Jun

Did you see that guys there are 5 of them, I counted :) 11:41 pm, Thu 11 Jun

By the way... i would be honored to make a donation towards any therapy you may need. P.s... can i be your friend? embear (10

) 12:07 pm, Thu 11 Jun

Has it ever bothered you that Therapist is The Rapist if you break the word in two? It bothers me, especially when they suggest hypnosis. 11:43 pm, Thu 11 Jun

Hi Mike, notice you aren't answering any more questions! Is that because you're busy doing your TV interview with John Campbell - we heard TV3 are trying to track you down!? If you have dinosaur pj's you could wear them on the telly! Have a fun day and enjoy your 15 minutes! jam66 (68

) 12:08 pm, Thu 11 Jun

I was told my attire was unsuitable (read awesome) for prime time television. They made me borrow clothes off one of the cameramen. He had the weirdest tattoo. 11:44 pm, Thu 11 Jun

That's a good way to advertise and make many on Trade me I don't no if something is Gone wrong with you or the people bidding on this washing machine LOL sam7861 (439

) 12:09 pm, Thu 11 Jun

You somehow managed to change tenses at least four or five times in the one sentence. How did you even do that? 11:47 pm, Thu 11 Jun

I think your drawings are fantastic and should be made into a kids dinosaur story book. What do you think? scooter1974 (503

) 12:10 pm, Thu 11 Jun

I think that salamanders are one of the most curious animals. did you know some salamanders, throughout their adult life, are entirely aquatic while others are entirely terrestrial? I know its the strangest thing. 11:50 pm, Thu 11 Jun

Hi Mike, Can you get in touch with us here at Fair Go as soon as possible? We'd like to make you an offer we feel you can't refuse.... Terri 09 916 7246 telgirl (55

) 12:11 pm, Thu 11 Jun

I once bought a jute sack at a garage sale for 60c and when I got it home I found it was open at each end. How pointless is that? I had to tie a string around one end so it would hold things in it and I ended up loosing quite a lot of it's capacity as a result and had to catch much smaller wallabies as a result. Is there anything I can do about this?, the seller is not returning my calls. 11:56 pm, Thu 11 Jun

writhing is one of two of my favourite words... the other is seething... I bet it does that too! terzann (42

) 12:12 pm, Thu 11 Jun

I quite like the word Voltron. 11:56 pm, Thu 11 Jun

um, i can just make them out - but what are the markings/symbols on the side of the machine. looks like a grid or a chart - is that so you can track where you have been when sucked through the portal? look, maybe i am reading too much into this, but i also think the shadow/imprint on the front of the machine is freaky, particularly if you tilt your head sideways (probably a good entry position when being sucked into the machine). ado2 (36

) 12:19 pm, Thu 11 Jun

Are you one of those people who can sees things that aren't really there? I used to live in Wellington. There were lots of people like that there. 11:58 pm, Thu 11 Jun

My husband has about a 200cm circumference, could you let me know the drum circ measurements so I can ensure he'd fit before bidding? bridgierapa (27

) 12:20 pm, Thu 11 Jun

If we lube him up I'm sure we can get him in. It develops quiet a bit of suction when the portal is open so I think he'll still go in even if it was a really small hole. I would recommend a water based lubricant as there will probbaly not be a shower where he ends up and vaselene can....never mind /next .............Do not read the afformentioned sentence out of context. 12:02 am, Fri 12 Jun

All this whiteware bashing !!!! poor machine - it's probably just a cycle it's going thru , hope the new owner will be more understanding - anorthener (58

) 12:20 pm, Thu 11 Jun

AH HA HA HA! You said cycle like a washing machine's programmed mechanical cycle but also meaning a temporary period of ones life. Thats so funny, its another one of those play-on-words jokes. 12:05 am, Fri 12 Jun

Hi there, I read alot of your comments and skimmed through more, so I apologise if someone has already asked this question : How does your ending go for Cinderella? nudge76 (97

) 2:23 pm, Thu 11 Jun

She died in a horrific pumpkin accident....the details are up there a bit ^^.....ok quite a lot but they're there....somewhere. 8:52 pm, Fri 12 Jun

Seller Comment: OK guys the last few hours have been nuts!!!! I have 159 unanswered which guess i better get on to soon, I have to do it in stints with time off in between as I'm like a one armed wallpaper hanger at the moment. T-Shirts are in production, watch trademe as they'll be here soon. I'll be listing the original artwork as separate auctions with a story about each dinosaur. The proceeds will go to Charities. They will be framed like a certificate of awesomeness. Stay with me, I'm trying :) 2:27 pm, Thu 11 Jun

have you attempted to sooth the beast that is your washing machine with black metal? In my travels I heard of such things happening with appliances in finland. After the rise of finnish black metal the strange goings on stopped. caramcd (114

) 2:31 pm, Thu 11 Jun

OK I'll try it, will Danish metal work? 8:52 pm, Fri 12 Jun

Seller Comment: Oh and watch close-up tonight. I had the bearded man himself in my house today. I bet they'll edit out the bit where the portal appeared as inter-world portal travel and dinosaurs is more the Discovery channel's cup of tea. Some bats came out this time and it was real dark in the portal. I never knew Mark Sainsbury was a Ninja did you? He actually karate-chopped a bat in half right down the middle, in the air, it was amazing. 2:32 pm, Thu 11 Jun

well done mate, extreamlly funny, though i know that was not the intention, but atleast i am now warned. can i buy a bat of you.the ones that came out when mark was there today?cheers mikey michelle2612 (29

) 5:25 pm, Thu 11 Jun

He scared them off with his AWESME beard. I wish I could grow a beard but I cant link-up, you know the bit which joins the Mo to the Chin. Yeah, not there, smooth, looks real weird. 8:54 pm, Fri 12 Jun

Seller Comment: I PROMISE TO HIT THIS PILE OF QUESTIONS TONIGHT!!!! (sorry for shouting) I Have been very busy being good, the first art auction for charity is up now, Stegosaurus!!, all proceeds to the Starship Children's Hospital. Come on lets use the power of this crazy old washing machine to help out some Kiwi kids who are having a rough time. http://www.trademe.co.nz/Browse/Listing.aspx?id=223859667 5:30 pm, Thu 11 Jun

112813 views? You rock man woo10 (54

) 6:06 pm, Thu 11 Jun

Oh this is a sign I am WAY, WAY behind the 8-ball ha ha 8:55 pm, Fri 12 Jun

Seller Comment: Seller added 1 photo 6:07 pm, Thu 11 Jun

how much for the stegasaurus? al-mcki (4

) 6:08 pm, Thu 11 Jun

The answer is out there.......(x-files music) 8:55 pm, Fri 12 Jun

Seller Comment: I just saw I'd forgotten to upload Tyrannosaurus, how could I forget him, hes like the coolest dinosaur that ever lived (except maybe Triceratops) Mr Vintage has him already, and a description, I wondered why they hadn't made a T-Rex t-shirt. Too much on my mind..... I actually have really bad tendonitus. Tendonitis is an inflamed sheath, yes I said sheath. 6:11 pm, Thu 11 Jun

Hey, Was considering buying this but have one small question. Did you see the Manwhich and if so was it possible to catch it? thunder900 (55

) 7:14 pm, Thu 11 Jun

Is that like a really manly sandwich? Or the consummation of a YYX relationship? 8:58 pm, Fri 12 Jun

Seller Comment: Not on CloseUp tonight :( Its been pushed to tomorrow because apparently David Bain has something he would like to say, sounds like he might have duped us all!! 7:15 pm, Thu 11 Jun

Do you think it will take my wifes pants off as Im always eager to get into them? shady48 (242

) 12:03 am, Fri 12 Jun

Do you know if they still make Cascade toasters? I used to have an awesome wide one which could fit the larger goldfish in it. Do you think a sandwich-press would work with a pond carp? 8:59 pm, Fri 12 Jun

Seller Comment: OK I am completely pooped, I have got to get some sleep. You guys have scrambled my brain ha ha. Thanks so much for all the charity support I'm really proud of this so far. Have fun :) 12:07 am, Fri 12 Jun

Could you please put the original dinosaurs picture back up? It was genius! and make a t-shirt with that original design as well? theannalyzer (44

) 12:13 am, Fri 12 Jun

I just ate a pizza. Does it annoy any one else here that Pizzahut put the swirl under the topping? Why?WHY? Thats like the pattie on the outside of a hamburger. The ingredients are the same but the result is very different. 8:50 pm, Fri 12 Jun

I think it is absolutely fantastic that you have put all your awesome art work up for auction with proceeds all going to children's charities. You obviously have a great sense of humour and a great way with words, but it is your generosity and compassion I am most impressed with. Well done - good for you! Any chance of you doing another picture and donating the money to the North Shore Life Education Trust? If you have children I am sure they have heard of Harold the Giraffe. :) cbm (121

) 12:23 am, Fri 12 Jun

Did you know the boy from Awhitu with the goats in his house was called Harold? Well it wasn't his real name but he looked like Harold from Coronation Street. 9:01 pm, Fri 12 Jun

thats awsome man , funny az springtides_n (1124

) 12:29 am, Fri 12 Jun

My friends grandma gave him a cupcake holder for xmas. He's a builder. 9:02 pm, Fri 12 Jun

Is this the 1000 rpm model or is it the stripped out 800 rpm version? petch001 (0

) 12:32 am, Fri 12 Jun

I don't know but I can find out, I have a laser rpm meter I bought on trademe. I'm quite excited as I've never had a chance to use it before. 9:03 pm, Fri 12 Jun

voltron is pokemon! jside52 (17

) 12:44 am, Fri 12 Jun

Wash out your mouth! 9:03 pm, Fri 12 Jun

hey mike! i do think that you should make the proceeds from one of the pictures go towards the SDF (Save the Dinosaur Foundation). keep up the good work! viento (34

) 12:44 am, Fri 12 Jun

I think they might have gone broke :( 9:04 pm, Fri 12 Jun

my tv was doing the same thng just yesterday, it kept fliping back to Jeremy Kyle... its like it wanted to torture me or something. Maybe the Icelanders put something in the wiring or global network to weaken us before their attack. like that little robot did in tranformers on air force one. I dont think Icelanders would have any where near that knowledge though... hmmm just in case im going to stock up on eagle memorabilia.. or maybe a nazi uniform.... jay2jay (269

) 12:44 am, Fri 12 Jun

I've warned you about the Bjork music, I don't know what else I can say.... 9:05 pm, Fri 12 Jun

Ibland undrar jag om du verkligen vet vad du säger. Ingen sömn för dig! Tvättmaskinernas hämnd. Kan jag få ditt namn så att jag vet vem jag pratar med? Jag har sett slutet, ingen besparas, inte ens barnen. studio1 (551

) 12:49 am, Fri 12 Jun

Hmmmn, something about a whiz-kid or Prodigy? To be honest I lost you after: Ibland undrar jag om du verkligen vet vad du säger. Ingen sömn för dig! Tvättmaskinernas hämnd. Kan jag få ditt namn så att jag vet vem jag pratar med? Jag har sett slutet, ingen besparas, inte ens barnen. 9:10 pm, Fri 12 Jun

Great charity work, I too am fundrasing for charity by selling my body for $50!!! http://www.trademe.co.nz/Business-farming-industry/Wholesale-lots/Novelty/auction-223234946.htm stac81 (44

) 12:52 am, Fri 12 Jun

I hope you are planning on using a waterproof marker. I recommend the plain Vivid brand although it can turn a slight purple colour after 15 minutes in the water. 9:14 pm, Fri 12 Jun

I might consider marrying you, if you have a staple gun. If you don't then just forget I said anything. emme7 (9

) 1:18 am, Fri 12 Jun

My dad has a pneumatic one, pneumatic is a strange word as it has a silent P like a girl. It is not phonetical. Come to think of it neither is the word Phonetical. 9:16 pm, Fri 12 Jun

I did send this to my family and friends overseas, can you imagine their reaction, they don't dare to come to NZ anymore hahaha Thank you for that! It was a great help. Did you bought that thing via TradeMe? hahaha what a joke! Great! wilmulders (100

) 1:30 am, Fri 12 Jun

I hope they were from Iceland. 9:17 pm, Fri 12 Jun

I was in primmers with a girl called Cindy. She had an bad accident too, but I don't think she was speeding; tripping maybe. Anyway, she used to bring pumpking sandwiches to school. They were disgusting. I felt sorry for her and gave her my jam ones. My washing machine stories are far too unbelievable to share, unlike yours. Long story short:We now own a commercial machine, but I'm not convinced its not possessed the way Gentle Annie & Mr Hoover were. Its starting to thump strange themes on SPIN leenz (37

) 1:39 am, Fri 12 Jun

Monarch butterfly caterpillars thrive on pumpkin. And then they die. 9:18 pm, Fri 12 Jun

Hi, As so many have said before me - this is very funny. You're on your way to becoming an internet sensation. I've helped by forwarding the link to this item to other people in America. Expect a call from Letterman anyday. 19571 (200

) 2:26 am, Fri 12 Jun

The letterman ripped my parcel this morning. It was way way bigger than the slot in the mailbox and the back of the mail box is wide open. I think there is a strong possibility he is a bit simple. 9:20 pm, Fri 12 Jun

I actually have the same model, and can vouch for it's ability to disrupt the space-time continuum. Maybe, if enough people have the same model, we can set up some sort of dimension gate and save the planet all those air-miles and CO2 and shit. And clean your clothes at the same time, minus the occasional sock. Awesome! gingasurfer (134

) 2:31 am, Fri 12 Jun

But where would your clothes end up? Or would it be one of those exchange systems like when you get your starter motor fixed? What if you were skinny and some fat pants arrived? Or even worse vise-versa? 9:29 pm, Fri 12 Jun

I am keen to see the portal you talk of my good man, could you whip up a youtube video for us? :D thedavid688 (1

) 3:42 am, Fri 12 Jun

Never ever ever look up Biggest Zit in the world on Youtube. No that is an actual warning. You are about to do it but don't say i didn't warn you. 9:30 pm, Fri 12 Jun

Is 'Rawr!' Really Monster For 'I Love You!'? -power_ranger- (22

) 4:05 am, Fri 12 Jun

It can mean a lot of things, a bit like 'stuff' 9:31 pm, Fri 12 Jun

Can you sell Blue-Prints to a Hyperdrive? I invented a storage device with A.D.D we could both be rich mikemr2 (63

) 4:35 am, Fri 12 Jun

Wouldn't it be a little erratic? 9:32 pm, Fri 12 Jun

Just letting you know this ad was read out on BBC Radio 1 yesterday and it had me in tears steve_82 (3

) 5:47 am, Fri 12 Jun

Really? How many British Born Cypriot's do you think there are? How many radio stations to they have? And if they are born in Britain, how can they be a Cypriot? 9:36 pm, Fri 12 Jun

Umm excuse me ... just a little question, do you drive a VW? 2xpetes (11

) 7:03 am, Fri 12 Jun

Has any one else ever noticed that a VW bonnet looks a bit like a clenched bum? 9:37 pm, Fri 12 Jun

I wonder with all this media attention, if Natalie Portman will actually hear about it and come and have a look. That would be cool. 6 degrees of separation and all that stuff. Nice work work dude, and well played on the shirts for charity too. eswor (139

) 7:06 am, Fri 12 Jun

Thats the whole reason I did this whole thing, every other attempt has failed to get her attention. 9:38 pm, Fri 12 Jun

No, seriously ( I am actually speaking the truth) two of our cats have opposable thumbs. The vet said it happened sometimes. The ginger one - he's called Mannie (at first we thought he was a girl and called him Mandy - but we found out she wasn't and then changed his name to Mannie. Quite a masculine name we thought) sometimes acts in a way that I think he might have figured out how to use them to his advantage. You know how arrogant and selfish cats are. Are there cats in the portal? bonedome (625

) 7:35 am, Fri 12 Jun

Have you taught them to play pea-knuckle? The reactions of a cat combined with opposable thumbs could be a force to be reckoned with. You should also train their thumbs to be a bit longer so they are extremely noticeable. 9:40 pm, Fri 12 Jun

I worked as an engineer at Fisher & Paykel in the 80's. The portal is a feature that those picky, ignorant-but-also-know-alls in Marketing and Legal pulled the plug on. You must have got one that did not get destroyed. F&P was way ahead of General Motors in that respect – see Wikipedia EV1. (Hmmmm, maybe Haier could buy GM.) Anyway, if your wife returns, please ask her if she met a guy named Mike who used to be head of the F&P marketing department in the early 80's or that quibbler in Legal. dhaysom (22

) 7:39 am, Fri 12 Jun

I think Haier is an ironic company name because it kind of sounds like Hi!-Ya! and they are Chinese. 9:43 pm, Fri 12 Jun

Maybe, just maybe, varying the voltage/ampage will allow you to tune the vortex? Seems a shame to give it away when you could travel to places like Davey Jone's locker (I just like those little rock crab things...) naked_batman (30

) 8:01 am, Fri 12 Jun

Yeah it's not waterproof which is a shame as I think I would be very interested in deep sea exploration. If you catch a baby seal on a fishing line and pull it up too quickly will it turn into an eskimo slipper on the way up? 9:46 pm, Fri 12 Jun

I pored 2 wheel barrows of concrete in the corner of the laundry an put it on top.That did the trick.Until I wanted to fix the dam thing,now I use it as a table. almino (39

) 8:24 am, Fri 12 Jun

Yeah, I guess all you can do is shift the lounge furniture to the laundry. 9:47 pm, Fri 12 Jun

this is the funniest auction i've ever seen on trade me, thank you for your warped sense of humour for making me laugh on a friday morning. i dont need a washing machine, but i'm almost considering buying this and printing out the description and cellotaping it on, just for future laughs. cheers bennyboy (65

) 8:27 am, Fri 12 Jun

If you ever need a laugh again, a good trick is to tie strings around your wrists until your hands go to sleep and then tickle your own armpits. Works every time.... Don't use double granny knots because remember both your hands are asleep. You can use supervision but it's probably easier just to get your supervisor to tickle you instead. You can return the favor by tickling them back. 9:54 pm, Fri 12 Jun

Hi just 2 quick questions. Doy ou think this would be good for getting rid of my evil mother in law ? and if your wife falls out of the porthole at the 'winners' house do they get to keep her too ? weekse (466

) 8:33 am, Fri 12 Jun

She could be a 35,000,000 year old skeleton, so we'll see when the time comes. I may not want her back. 9:56 pm, Fri 12 Jun

Haha! Your page was on Breakfast today! Congrats :D kayeeee (17

) 8:34 am, Fri 12 Jun

Weird, I usually have a pot of yogurt and some cereal for breakfast. Muesli gives me indigestion. Did you know your stomach has two sphincters? 9:57 pm, Fri 12 Jun

oh and you should seriously consider a career in childrens books ! Your illistrations and descriptive narations are awesome ! weekse (466

) 8:36 am, Fri 12 Jun

Does it make you uncomfortable when people nervously rub their thighs? 9:58 pm, Fri 12 Jun

Hey I live in Waiuku! That sure does explain a lot :-) mrstreechopper (43

) 8:40 am, Fri 12 Jun

My favorite bit of Pukekohe is the road which leads to Waiuku its where dreams go to be reborn. Waiuku is like a great palace in the sky made of crystallized angel tears. If it wasn't for Waiuku the Sun would probably set in the south but like any of us it just wants the last thing it sees for the day to be beautiful. 10:08 pm, Fri 12 Jun

I think i have your iron.....found it trying to flatten a crumpled shirt, nasty business!!! Love your work.....give up your day job. themarshall1 (76

) 8:44 am, Fri 12 Jun

Weird it never worked on shirts for me, maybe ironing dinosaur skin for millions of years has made it grateful. 10:09 pm, Fri 12 Jun

Maybe its a descendant of the old Hoovermatic twin tub I once had. Chased me and my sister across the laundry even after the plug came out from the wall, bits were flying off in all directions like missiles as we sheltered behind the toilet door. But then again lots of weird things happened in that house. curranx3 (219

) 8:44 am, Fri 12 Jun

People from the south island call vacuum cleaners Hoovers. I wonder if the call Hoover washing machines Hoovers too because that could get confusing in a busy household. 10:14 pm, Fri 12 Jun

Charlie..... Charlie...... Charlie....... bonedome (625

) 8:48 am, Fri 12 Jun

Whiskey....India....Echo....Romeo....Delta 10:16 pm, Fri 12 Jun

Hey, I think youre post may have just cleared up a few problems. The only question is that I need to know is when your worm hole opened up, because I think I may have had another branch of the same hole open up over my machine. During the short time it was open it swallowed my Porsche GT3, a couple of Ming Dynasty Vases and beautiful set of my partners Tiffany's diamond earings, my Stihl chainsaw. Ive spoken to the Police and AMI insurance and neither believe me....however.... oilystair (20

) 8:54 am, Fri 12 Jun

I hope you specified the cc rating and the bar length. Stihl chainsaws also come in two durability levels. Its best to say you had the pro series even if you have no back yard like me. Everyone deserves the right to own an immensely powerful chainsaw way beyond what is necessary. 10:20 pm, Fri 12 Jun

Hey, youre post has cleared up one massive prob for me. I need to know when your wormhole opened, because I think it distorted the space time boundary around all washing machines including mine. If it was last week sometime can you be specific because a hole opened above mine and swallowed my Porcshe GT3, a couple of Ming Dynasty vases, my new Rolex and 186 bottles of Don Perignon '68. The insureres didnt believe me and now I have proof thanks to you...I have forwarded your dino pics to Police. oilystair (20

) 8:59 am, Fri 12 Jun

Pretty sure I just answered this, oh I get it, I busted you on the whole chainsaw claim and you are hoping no one saw it. 10:22 pm, Fri 12 Jun

OMG... I'm dying, thank you for the funniest thing I've read in ages. Good luck with your auction. :D jen76 (572

) 9:02 am, Fri 12 Jun

Why do some houses have the door knob in the middle of the door? I would like a door that opens like an iris and shoots steam out around the edges. 10:23 pm, Fri 12 Jun

My washing machine is too quiet...dodgy quiet...the sort of quietness that people talk about once you've discovered your neighbour was a serial killer...at least when yours turns on you you can hear it coming....i'll never know what hit me. tereza5 (6

) 9:02 am, Fri 12 Jun

Oh I know the one, are you sure? it seemed so nice, it used to mow my lawns. 10:24 pm, Fri 12 Jun

I hope your washing all these T shirts so we all know they are clean and just about been to another dimension. Oh and how long is TV series going to take before it gets aired? ineedit2 (97

) 9:08 am, Fri 12 Jun

Thats why they are on special, they are just the old ones that people have bought back. There is a basement full of underpaid people picking off the old logos and hand drawing the dinosaurs on with those fabric pens. We have turned the lights off so the drawings don't end up too well done. I miss puff pens. 10:28 pm, Fri 12 Jun

by the way, my washing machine can walk, it taught itself. How cool is that ?. It only does it when its plugged in and when Im not around.It had approached the car the other week and its only for the fact that I had a steering lock on that stopped Mr Whirlpool making a fast getaway. I told my partner that it walks and she said "yeh, it tap dances and juggles too !!".but now I think she is just being stupid and talking the mick !.man those Dinosaurs are really scarey you must have been terrirfied oilystair (20

) 9:12 am, Fri 12 Jun

Just park your car further away from the washing machine. Well thats what i'd do. 10:29 pm, Fri 12 Jun

Hi i work for a large backpacking company and we are need of a great marketing mind for some short term work. If you want some free holidays and make some money on the side please give me a bell 021 238 0847 shan1111 (17

) 9:14 am, Fri 12 Jun

Now nearly 300,000 people have your phone number. That could either be very good or very annoying. 10:32 pm, Fri 12 Jun

what a dinasor?? also i be have anutha questoin. why peeple go to school? do their be a point to it?? wood i learn wot a dinosour be? buddy999 (45

) 9:22 am, Fri 12 Jun

Are you a LoLcat? 10:33 pm, Fri 12 Jun

I know you got a hell of alot of questions my friend but i think you should sell to SPOOKERS, they will pay hansomely and will save them money on hiring actors. USE THE REAL TERROR! Good Luck. westlivn (13

) 9:24 am, Fri 12 Jun

Why don't they just employ real ghosts? and there must be loads of actual ex-chainsaw murderer's who are looking for work. They'd probably be a lot cheaper too. 10:35 pm, Fri 12 Jun

This is Mikes old neighbour..... also know as Mike. I am a ginga so naturally strong, mentally stable and can cope with the worst of the worst. This washing machine forced me out of my own home when Mike moved in next door. We tried inviting our selves over for BBQ and friendly drinks on numerous occasiontions with the intention of slaying the dino within our walls!! Good Luck to the person that ends up with this beast. 1hedge (37

) 9:29 am, Fri 12 Jun

Oh hey Mike. He's not lying he actually is a Ginga :D 10:36 pm, Fri 12 Jun

Hey Mate! did you know that the Icelandic Invasion is already Here? And whats worse - our All Blacks coach Graham Henry (must be related to Paul Henry) & Wayne smith are behind it. You don't believe me? "ICE AGE UPON US ONCE MORE" is yesterdays headline at http://www.3news.co.nz/News/SportsNews/Ice-age-upon-us-once-more/tabid/415/articleID/108198/cat /70/Default.aspx. Henry reckons da crowd will be gripping their seats tightly and grimacing this Saturday at Carisbrook when Toeava gets da ball! koolkat1 (551

) 9:29 am, Fri 12 Jun

I knew this time would come. I better fire up the Telsa coil, this could get real rough. If they've bought the polarbears with guns on their backs we might have to go underground for a while. I haven't worked out how to combat them. I think the only one who can save us is the Undertaker. 1:08 am, Sat 13 Jun

I dont need a washing machine (especially not one this scary!) but I did need a laugh, legend! Good luck with the exorcism (sp?). johs1 (71

) 9:30 am, Fri 12 Jun

Where did they get the idea for cherry flavour? Because cherries taste like plums to me and plum flavour is very different to cherry flavour. I think we've been duped. 1:10 am, Sat 13 Jun

Hi There, Just wondering if the undertaker/shark artwork will be for sale as my husband has been consumed by their awesomeness and i wish to better his birthday present for me (which was nothing btw :( 21years old and i got no presents!) by buying the shark artwork for him, the guilt will flow as these pictures are beyond compare! btw you know fletch and vaughan? i envy you. tonith1 (34

) 9:38 am, Fri 12 Jun

Never met Fletch but Vaughan is a character that haunts my past. He is from Morrinsville, isn't that weird? I thought Vaughan was a girl until I went to a party at his house and saw his enormous side burns. There are more auctions coming, maybe tomorrow, sorry no buy nows, you guys will set the price and there are more charities to be helped. You know the t-shirts are for sale though right? I see the MrVintage auctions have disappeared temporarily but they will be back up soon. 1:21 am, Sat 13 Jun

Hi...I have a dryer that would be a good mate for your washer. rebullz (592

) 9:56 am, Fri 12 Jun

I have some drinking glasses which are actually old nutella jars. 1:22 am, Sat 13 Jun

any chance of taking it for a quick spin? like you haven't heard that one before.raising money for charity and giving away free laughs ---awesome falconflyer (216

) 10:02 am, Fri 12 Jun

Ha ha you said a joke. It was another play-on-words joke. I wonder how many people get it. It's very subtle. 1:26 am, Sat 13 Jun

Have you been watching land of the lost? lol nzoomed (347

) 10:03 am, Fri 12 Jun

I think the dinosaurs look unrealistic, their eyes are too small and they lack colouration. 1:27 am, Sat 13 Jun

Brillant man !!!!!! if only people opened their eyes and minds more....What a beautiful world we would have!!! You are the champion !!! antonio23 (501

) 10:11 am, Fri 12 Jun

We do have a beautiful world :D Especially Waiuku, its where all the butterflies come from and they have a sunshine factory which they do tours through. You can go through for half price on a Saturday. 1:28 am, Sat 13 Jun

I know it has been said before but thats is really funny and made me laugh out loud when i was by myself!! you are a very funny man, thanks for the giggle:) janeym2 (5

) 10:11 am, Fri 12 Jun

I really like the word giggle. My flat-mate has a good giggle. She is from South Africa and talks a bit funny but other than that she's lovely. She calls a ruler a rewlier. 1:30 am, Sat 13 Jun

Man this is wicked. The DeLorean DMC-12 had nothing on this. It could take you back to the future.... but in a port hole? No way, and it removes your pants on the way too. It’s ideal. Getting to a foreign location with out pants there's nothing more ideal than that. P.S Can you lick your elbow on the other side of this portal? I’ve been unsuccessful for months and people have been starting to stare. wakedog (21

) 10:14 am, Fri 12 Jun

What you need to do is get two linked portholes facing each other, you bend down to about mid chest height and put your left elbow through one then lean to the right and as you see your elbow pop out of the other porthole you should be able to lick it. This is of course dependent on how far apart you put the portals and how long your humerus's are. 1:33 am, Sat 13 Jun

Seller - we have two of these actual models - one at our home and one at our bach - what we do is line the family up, press start cycle and teleport from one machine to the other to save travel time and gas. You need to sell to a family who only have one (they must use matching pair) and want to teleport too, and for a lot more money as it has these advanced teleporting features. Saw your wife in limbo while teleporting myself, use reverse cycle to get her back, before she exits via a Simpson. mikejc2 (58

) 10:22 am, Fri 12 Jun

Ok hang-on, if the bach is vacant, who turns on the other one to receive you? Or do you have it on a very reliable and trustworthy timer? 1:35 am, Sat 13 Jun

have you ever recorded the noise and played it backwards? There may be a message, or even a plan to get thru the portal to another world!!! kahuna48 (316

) 10:26 am, Fri 12 Jun

Have you ever seen a video of someone eating a pie backwards? 1:36 am, Sat 13 Jun

I have a young rooster I'm trying to sell (kind of resembles your dinasour). If all this jibberjabber doesn't get you a bid, would you consider a swap? mag_pi (60

) 10:27 am, Fri 12 Jun

I love Mr-T, how is it that he stays the same age. I swear I have trippled in size and he hasn't changed a bit. I wonder if is sheer awesomeness has scared the aging process away. 1:38 am, Sat 13 Jun

Sounds alot like my mums old washing machine. Her partner swore it was female (as i think yours is) cos he would reach down below with lube to get her going properly and she would purr like a pussy. Washing was always a bit soiled tho. bexchris (59

) 10:29 am, Fri 12 Jun

Do you have an ankle bracelet with a cool flashing red light that makes a blue and white helicopter appear when you walk outside? 1:42 am, Sat 13 Jun

why are there 318 , and counting this one 319 UNANSWERED questions? I was looking forward to my reading last night. cheers buckyboy (128

) 10:30 am, Fri 12 Jun

Ok this is my vs world, I am doing my best and not doing a lot of sleeping. This is Friday night, ...............I should be out at nose flute lessons. 1:43 am, Sat 13 Jun

Hey man Im realy Sick of this world do you think I could go round to yours and get sucked in? With this Swine flu and David Bain now on the loose im really worried one of them will get. Please help me i need your address now master_flash_09 (62

) 10:31 am, Fri 12 Jun

You should get a pen and paper out and draw your self a dinosaur, it'll really cheer you up. 1:44 am, Sat 13 Jun

Have you tried talking to it? Maybe asking for its name? All it probably needs/wants in this world is a hug! famalexander (11

) 10:32 am, Fri 12 Jun

Yeah thats what it wants you to think, so it can eat you, then synthesise your voice perfectly calling for help untill your children come looking for you and then it will eat them too. And so the cycle continues..... 1:45 am, Sat 13 Jun

Oh my gosh, you saw a wombat in Waterview? AAAAARGH! I got attacked by one 2 weeks ago in Australia - I was trying to feed it and it bit my hand! Now I'm scared that there might be one lurking down the road from me. I live in Kingsland. Want to come to Crave cafe for brunch on the weekend? It's 25 McDonald St, Morningside. - Becky :) bmas021 (156

) 10:32 am, Fri 12 Jun

Hi Becky. I have a busy weekend planned, me and some friends heard that there is a new concrete pad going in at a building site in New Lynn so we were going to go down and time it to see how long it takes to set hard. The last one took ages. But we made a really cool graph. 1:48 am, Sat 13 Jun

Hi. It's Nigel here with the "cracked rib" My email that time saying I couldn't come with you to the Dail Jones Fan Club Meeting was in code. "Cracked rib" is code for crazy wife. She is totally mesuginah and fortunately like you is not that bright - she reads all my emails and didn't get it either or my skull would be cracked. Can I bring her round to use your washing machine? dhone (58

) 10:46 am, Fri 12 Jun

Will she or any of her friends be reading this you think? 1:55 am, Sat 13 Jun

The phrase "one armed paper hanger" is soooooooo passe. All the best people now say "one-legged man at an arse-kicking party" dhone (58

) 10:50 am, Fri 12 Jun

What about a quadruple amputee at a beach volleyball tournament? 1:56 am, Sat 13 Jun

Hey Po Po, If required in a battle could any of your sweet rides beat your washing machines vortex of death? I'm into bidding for this puppy but would need to buy one of your rides as a safety backup if things go south. But but only if it could handle the jandle Jonny sn0w (8

) 11:08 am, Fri 12 Jun

Are things going south Jonny? It happens over time and is a natural part of aging. It is possible to be happy with how you are and to enjoy life sags, bags and all. Personally I think a person's character can be measured by how stretchy they are. My friend Cam has a nice character and he can stretch his top lip right up and over until it covers his face and hair. He does it just before diving into a pool which sometimes freaks new people out. 2:01 am, Sat 13 Jun

hahahahahahahahaha! this is 100% awsumness! ur auction is better than that jesus pita bread dude from hamilton! plz, keep on selling ur sadistic appliances..! hae, if i ever had a toaster from hell that burns toast when its on the lowest setting possible(if i ever did) can i contact u and have u sell it for me? oh, and im so sorry abowt ur wife... and the iron... andrehansen (921

) 11:12 am, Fri 12 Jun

If that happens to your toaster all you need to do is pop the toast up quicker. Its just an idea and I'll put it out there, try it and if it doesn't work I'll take it back. 2:02 am, Sat 13 Jun

You need to copy your pictures, to make numbered, limited edition prints. Then you could keep selling the signed and numbered prints, and you wouldn't have to keep wasting your felt tips drawing new pictures. addles (245

) 11:12 am, Fri 12 Jun

But drawing new pictures is fun, I'd rather draw the series than print them. Each one can have a name. I think I will call the first one Doug. 2:04 am, Sat 13 Jun

Hey Mike, ya seem kind of busy right now. Want me to do your washing for your. No seriously... strawdinaryfem (365

) 11:22 am, Fri 12 Jun

I see through your clever ploy. Icelander. You wont trick me that easy. When I go down it will be heroically in battle not by poisoning. 2:07 am, Sat 13 Jun

Where's the original dinosaur pics with the wonky eyes?? How many watchers have you got watching?? TM legend right here. :) first_bubz (330

) 11:25 am, Fri 12 Jun

8375 which is about the population of Waiuku. It wont be many people from Waiuku though as they are too busy looking at splendorous things like lolly pop trees and sparkling unicorns. 2:10 am, Sat 13 Jun

Seller Comment: Good night everyone. Thank you to all the bidders on the charity auctions, thank you also to the crazy people bidding on the satanic hell spawn I hope you realise what you are unleashing on yourselves and your families. Trade me will be pulling off comments which have been here more than 24 hours that i have not been able to answer. I apologise that I will not be able to answer everyone. I will try to read all your comments, even though there are crazy amounts of them. Peace & Mungbeans Mikew4 2:28 am, Sat 13 Jun

whoa who really has time to read all this?! yoouve got to be over it or really board-u pick ur poision smurf91 (166

) 3:51 am, Sat 13 Jun

Poison were awesome. I used to draw daggers with snakes wrapped around them on my pencil case. I don't have a pencil case any more but I do have all of my flatmate's fudge duet chocolates in my mouth right now. 12:48 pm, Sat 13 Jun

A story of forestry for Mike..So one day there was a man, a lonely man who didn’t have any friends. His only companion was an armadillo whom he met in 1974 during spring break. They were lost in a forest and had been in there since 1983 . They went to the forest originally after the first episode of the a team aired because BA Baracus had said ‘ I pity the fool that don’t go in no forest’ and the man whose name was Matt King Cole, was very gullible and didn’t want So alas he went to a ur.my.boy.blue. (219

) 3:54 am, Sat 13 Jun

I wish I'd got to read the end of that awesome story. 12:52 pm, Sat 13 Jun

BA Baracus to pity him.So alas he went to a forest with his trusty armardillo. For 16 years they roamed until they could roam no more. Matt King Cole was still wearing his golden dressing gown and his hair had grown oh so very luscious. Secretly the armadillo was envious of Matt King Coles luscious hair and plotted to kill him. Matt King Cole was also very attractive, he was a cross between Richard dean Anderson and that guy from quantum leap. So the armadillo had to work fast. ur.my.boy.blue. (219

) 3:55 am, Sat 13 Jun

Oh look here it is....goody. How did Nat King Cole keep the sticks and twigs out of his hair for so long? I went for a short walk in the park before lunch and came back with dreads. 12:53 pm, Sat 13 Jun

One evening when Matt King Cole was sleeping angelically under a tree the armadillo sat on him and killed him. Then he wandered off deeper into the forest wearing a golden dressing gown and humming that theme song for that horrible 80s show with corky in it. (oh bla de oh bla de life goes on yeah! La lal alife goes on)……….. ur.my.boy.blue. (219

) 3:58 am, Sat 13 Jun

My dressing gown is purple and it has STAG embroidered on the back. 12:54 pm, Sat 13 Jun

I expect to win this auction if your machine has the attributes I think it may have. The noise emmission interests me - it could play a useful role in a movie now in production. Please describe the sound produced when the following are washed; towels, socks, underwear, excessively dirty underwear. In addition what garments / objects produce unusual sounds ?? Many thanks; M L CapnHook Film Productions. mwlittle (233

) 6:06 am, Sat 13 Jun

They are generally all like a sort of the same but missed differently. It starts off with a whine like a helicopter starting up, then over that a noise like someone hitting a corrugated iron water tank with a post slowly grows, and then in the front of that there is a sort of "ping ping ping ping ping ping...." and between every 'ping' there is a scraping noise like a spade on concrete. Laid over all that there is a sound like John Campbell doing a burnout in a Cortina right down to the rims. 1:04 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Hey man Your gonna have to find a way to get your wife back to help reply to all these questions even if just for a week (or untill this auction ends then send her back before the devils machine is picked up) . Good luck with the auction. Its going to be a record price for one of these machines corbie21 (81

) 6:25 am, Sat 13 Jun

The god of trade me seems to be doing a daily cull, I think I can do it, thank goodness scary washing machine is office porn, It must be really slowing the productivity of the country, oops. 1:11 pm, Sat 13 Jun

There's a book in here...just screaming to get out wetagogo22 (202

) 7:08 am, Sat 13 Jun

Can you also hear plants scream when you pull off the flowers? 1:12 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Thats awesome, well done, we have a wee club down here in Central Otago for wee Special Stars such as your self. (also used to have this washing machines brother some years ago). tractordude (59

) 7:39 am, Sat 13 Jun

I got a gold star on my hand once for not biting the other kids. 1:15 pm, Sat 13 Jun

hey, I had a few too many last night and I am positive I went through the porthole, I am sure I saw your wife with the iron, maybe draw a picture of them to so if it happens again I will know it is them and bring them back for you. lnkay (149

) 12:38 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Hmmn so that was you bidding? never ever drink and bid. i once bought a mountain bike while drunk or trade me. The silly thing is it was my old bike. I just missed it and wanted it back again. Then I sold it. 12:45 pm, Sat 13 Jun

I represent Te Papa and was wondering if I could interest the ultimate winning bidder in donating the Scary Machine to us. This is a serious piece of Kiwiana and will go well with our collection of 80's Walk-Shorts and Beach Towels. gixxernz (216

) 2:11 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Oh man I wish the whole stubby craze that L&P started caught on long term. The feeling of freedom is second only to nudity and far less likely to send you to jail for a little bit. 2:20 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Hey - I've noticed that the closing prices of washing machines has increased markedly since your auction began. Obviously the interest in yours is affecting the "market price" of washing machines. I suggest that your next auction should be for "New Zealand"....you might get us out of this recession single handedly!! gixxernz (216

) 2:16 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Well guys you heard the man, forward this to all your overseas friends and make NZ even more like heaven. Check the Oxford English Dictionary. New Zealand gets a mention under the word Paradise. Its something about a duck but just ignore that bit. 2:22 pm, Sat 13 Jun

When we got married 30 years ago, my then new husband had to sell his beloved motorbike to buy a washing machine. Told him to take a ride in the washing machine if he wanted a spin craftylady1 (422

) 2:19 pm, Sat 13 Jun

He didn't HAVE to sell his motorbike there is probably a laundromat less than 2km from your house. I bet he still has the motorbike, in a barn or shed at a friends house and he doesn't play squash on a Thursday night either. 2:25 pm, Sat 13 Jun

LEGEND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! cam_the_man (1

) 2:24 pm, Sat 13 Jun

My friend had a Honda Legend. It's name was kind of over-selling itself a bit. Kind of like calling your kid "Zoltar the Destroyer" before you even know if he will ever learn to walk. 2:27 pm, Sat 13 Jun

I have a 22 year cat with very blocked sinuses, and she keeps me awake at night with Her snoring. Would you consider some kind of discount if I included Her? She also does a lot of washing but doesn't do the porthole thing with the dinosaurs. When I got Her I called Her Kitty because she was a kitty, but I could never think of a name, so She's still called Kitty. She also has a power cord included for Her night time breathing apparatus. Have a think about it anyway. steve5552 (201

) 2:26 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Wasabe is the answer. 2:28 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Does it play Nintendo Games? synty (20

) 2:29 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Its not very good at any video games because it does not have opposable thumbs and it's vision is quite poor. 2:31 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Seller Comment: Hey!!! Where did my unanswered messages go? I was having fun!! 2:29 pm, Sat 13 Jun

I am meant to be loading my washing machine right now but instead I am reading your auction. Reading about washing machines is better than doing washing. deetrain (89

) 2:35 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Reading about the migration patterns of the spotted warbler is probably more exciting than doing washing. Unless you are doing the washing in a hot-air balloon far above the Andes. 2:49 pm, Sat 13 Jun

You are obviously going through withdrawal symptoms, with no questions to answer. So I thought I would help you out. have you considered doing a pterodactyl picture? Now they are REALLY scary! cbm (121

) 2:36 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Honestly, does any one know the point of a silent P is? it serves no purpose at all as far as i can tell. 3:02 pm, Sat 13 Jun

You are a genius! instead of getting 20bucks to get the machine off your hands you are up to $2600 and have t-shirts in production! absolutely brilliant... im not downplaying the horror of what you go through everyday but this is some great marketing work by yourself :) benie1 (16

) 2:39 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Thanks, sure I've made some on the spot decisions in the last few days but I can assure you with all honesty, when i listed this on monday I was surprised when someone bid a dollar. Scary washing Machine is running it's self now there's a scary thought. Maybe the demon is the washing machine wanted out and now it actually here, on this very page, this might even be him here---> . 3:05 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Ever tried having a bit of "fun" on it while its going? eliza24 (26

) 2:39 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Yeah, once we had the end of year party for the chess club at our house and as a novelty event Laurence and Trevor played a game of chess on top of it while it was finishing a cycle. It was so comical, they had a real struggle keeping all their rooks in place. I think Trevor won when She accidentally got checkmate and we all laughed and laughed. 3:08 pm, Sat 13 Jun

when i do put the washing in my machine i can see you trying to put stuff in your machine. dont think you can see me though becasue no matter how much i wave you dont wave back :( sjtait (17

) 2:41 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Oh thats a bit embarrassing, last time I used the washing machine it was my last set of clothes so I took them off and put them straight into the machine. I did it while my flatmate was on the loo so she wouldn't see. We do not have a nudity policy in our house. We exercise modesty in our daily living. 3:11 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Hey, I'm NOT interested in your washing machine at all (I have one that works fine!!), but I WOULD be interested in you putting a photo of yourself up on the auction ... I'm very curious to put a face to the auction:). Maybe then I might need another washing machine after all lol Lucy holden38 (575

) 2:42 pm, Sat 13 Jun

You first Lucy... 3:13 pm, Sat 13 Jun

You've answered 506 questions as at 1438 Pacific Standard Time! Just thought you might like to know! telford55 (119

) 2:43 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Excellent, thats 4.2 questions per hour for the last 120 hours. I have a problem here which needs addressing. 3:25 pm, Sat 13 Jun

awsum story loved it made my day reading this didnt relise this auction would get as much attention as it has good luck with the auctions and hope the buyer goes through with the sale so u dont have that washing machine any more :) twiztid17 (75

) 2:43 pm, Sat 13 Jun

I'm really excited because we are getting the internet. 3:27 pm, Sat 13 Jun

what are the dimensions? debjs (333

) 2:44 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Around 700x700x1000 ish when it is in it's passive state. When it is in it's active state the outer dimensions are variable by up to as much as 35,000,000 years which at the speed of light is too many zeros for this text field. I just learned the speed of light is more accurately defined scientifically than the metre. Thats an interesting fact isn't it? 3:31 pm, Sat 13 Jun

RE: "Hey!!! Where did my unanswered messages go? I was having fun!!" ... look for them in your clothelines, as your Scary washing machine has already rinsed them. microft768 (600

) 2:48 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Yeah there's some weird inter dimensional thing going on here, I think my theory of the washing machine's evil spirit moving to this auction could certainly bare some weight. 3:32 pm, Sat 13 Jun

re those drawings, would you sell them to NZ Post if they wanted to print them on the stamps? microft768 (600

) 2:51 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Yeah cant see why not, that would be awesome, the stamps would be seen all around the world so would certainly help ScaryWashingMachine on it's quest for world domination. It will be a very happy world though don't worry.. 3:34 pm, Sat 13 Jun

hmmm I wonder what will happen when the page views inevitably passes 999999...maybe the site will begin to violently implode into a super massive blackhole of doomness haha...Mesa! chaosonearth (47

) 2:51 pm, Sat 13 Jun

I think the Jesus Pita-bread broke 1,000,000 in 7 days, but it had a fairly big 2009 year old fan base to pull on to start with so we are doing ok :D 3:35 pm, Sat 13 Jun

?????i? ?no? o? ?uop s,?i ???? ??s o? ???? plno? i ???lqo?d ??? ??los ?,upip ???? ?nq `???su?d?o? o? u?op ?pisdn p??oq??? ?? ?uiu?n? p?i?? u??? i ?????uis u?op ?pisdn ?ui?i?? u??q s?i ?nq ???p?o? ??? ?i? ???q ?i p?llnd `l???od ??? ??no??? p???ns ?o? p??oq??? ?? ?luo `?ui???? ?ui?s?? ?? ??i? ??u?i??dx? ??li?is ? p?? i `uo?i pu? ??i? ?no? ?noq? p?i??o? ??oq ?q plno? i alexfuerst (9

) 2:53 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Oh cool, a cypher, this will keep me happy for months, even years, then one day I will break it and find it says. "Dont bother with this code there's nothing of importance written here anywnay" 3:38 pm, Sat 13 Jun

any updates on how those scary polar bears are going with their weapons training? this one is unarmed but still dangerous! http://www.thepoles.com/story/ExWebArcticSpecialExplorers,bearsandgunsMay62005.shtml mattone2 (61

) 2:55 pm, Sat 13 Jun

That was one of the earlier models they were trialling, i think they were discontinued and recalled due to a safety hazard with the inverter module. 3:41 pm, Sat 13 Jun

I would like to know, do you work for Bond and Bond? Noel Leemings? Harvey Norman? I think this could possibly be a clever recession based ploy to make us all scared of our slightly-dated washing machines and rush out to buy new ones. Either that or a trickey way to distract the good citizens of NZ while the Icelanders quietly invade our shores. They've hit hard times you know, and being so mad keen on glaciers and volcanoes they'd feel right at home here. sarah2000 (49

) 2:56 pm, Sat 13 Jun

OK I admit it this whole thing was a proaganda publicity stunt to raise the profile of the NZAII party. New Zealanders Against Icelandic Invasion 3:45 pm, Sat 13 Jun

have you thought about throwing a cellular phone or walky talky through portal so you can have cantact to with the other side stevin (240

) 2:58 pm, Sat 13 Jun

It took my phone the other day while talking to the Rock, I then called my phone form the land line curious to see if it would work and I was most surprised when i heard myself pick up at the other end. i sounded a little distressed. It was a bit too weird so I hung up. 3:49 pm, Sat 13 Jun

I bet they're not bidding for your scary Yracs, they're bidding on the bandwidth spent on the Page Views ... what a bubble bath you're having! microft768 (600

) 2:59 pm, Sat 13 Jun

I think you have the wrong auction, I am not even auctioning the Year-Round Achievement Center At Southeast, its in Fresno California and i have never even been there. 3:53 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Well back to the mandarins......... I peeled a "Charlies" mandarin and it too had 11 segments, just thought you might like to know. I am loving you auctions and think you are doing fab job, I dont envy you having to reply to all us crazy people wanting to be a part of this, and your mum must be well proud, good on you!!! :) mopar01 (76

) 3:00 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Yeah I had a home grown one from my friend Jules' mums tree last night and it had 11 too. Had one this morning at breakfast......11. I think the 8 segment one was some sort of anomaly. 3:54 pm, Sat 13 Jun

I haven't been so entertained for a long time! Wondering what I have around here that I can sell, I have a pretty good imagination but don't think I can beat yours so maybe my item would not get the same attention. BTW is someone really going to pay that price for a 1985 washing machine???? lynnem47 (169

) 3:01 pm, Sat 13 Jun

I certainly hope they will. Its still cheaper than this one... http://blog.luxuryproperty.com/wp-content/uploads/image/samsung.jpg Its listed as POA. Only really expensive things are POA. If you cant afford a phone call, you cant afford the washing machine must be their motto. 3:59 pm, Sat 13 Jun

good work on the charity stuff thats wicked!!!!!!!!!!!!! smurf91 (166

) 3:01 pm, Sat 13 Jun

If when you spin something around, things on it's surface get flung out by centripetal force right? Then how come the earth spins with a surface speed at the equator of 1660km/h and 0km/h at the north and south poles, but the effect of gravity is the same everywhere on the globe? 4:03 pm, Sat 13 Jun

turns out the evil icelanders are fighting against the polar bears after all!! http://current.com/items/89000407_wandering-polar-bear-shot-in-iceland.htm mattone2 (61

) 3:02 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Its a cover up. the only reason they are thought to be endangered is because the Icelanders have them all in their underground fortresses being fitted with guns. 4:05 pm, Sat 13 Jun

I think when Trademe unplugs this auction, the whole Auckland would have a power surge & all eletrical appliances has gone POPCORNS ! microft768 (600

) 3:03 pm, Sat 13 Jun

You were doing really well right up to the end bit there when the Torretts kicked in but you have a the makings of a valid point. 4:07 pm, Sat 13 Jun

sounds like this washing machine belongs in dunedin!!!! in fact i feel it will be quite at home in my dinosaur of a house! 123nz (24

) 3:06 pm, Sat 13 Jun

My Sister in law lived in Dunedin. They don't understand what insulation is in Dunedin. The water in her toilet froze up once. I bet the toilets don't even freeze in Iceland. Even though their houses are made of frozen water. 4:11 pm, Sat 13 Jun

hey your washing machine is old enough to vote and is in the Mt Albert electorate, pity there isnt a vortex of death party... mattone2 (61

) 3:09 pm, Sat 13 Jun

I'm pretty sure there is,....it's just got another name. 4:11 pm, Sat 13 Jun

trade for my listing???? im quite keen on trying to catch the diplodoucs my yard is rather overgrown. do you think sum how he could be drawn through the portal, maybe i could bribe him with some yummy treats??? daikee (167

) 3:10 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Can you hold out an entire tree at arms length? I cant. 4:12 pm, Sat 13 Jun

I seriously hope this doesn't turn into another free farm story and the final bidder coughs up! Good on you. I love your sense of humour and you looked pretty ok too on Close up last night! belise (56

) 3:12 pm, Sat 13 Jun

They had to use a body-double, they didn't want to lose their G rating. :( 4:13 pm, Sat 13 Jun

I live in Awhitu and I am DEEPLY offended with your less than flattering comments about it's inhabitants. I would never, never allow a goat inside my house. That would be very wrong. Sheep, on the other hand, are an entirely different kettle of fish: http://images.trademe.co.nz/photoserver/1/96209101_full.jpg "Kettle of fish". That's an interesting term. Have you tried putting your goldfish in a kettle? jmfan (77

) 3:15 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Psycho also has a silent P.... Not that I'm implying anything.... I have a freind called Wade who actually goes to Awhitu at his own will. How weird is that? 4:30 pm, Sat 13 Jun

hi gold_lotus (147

) 3:16 pm, Sat 13 Jun

ho hi ho its off to.....oh hang... 4:31 pm, Sat 13 Jun

My daughter Ella 6 years old wants too know if the scary washing machine will eat her if she is naughty mil81 (24

) 3:16 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Tell her it will chew her up bones and all and then do a big burp that smells like kid juice. 4:32 pm, Sat 13 Jun

After seeing the BEAST last night on Close Up and being completely petrified, I had some AWFUL nightmares about your machine last night. I dreamt that my flatmates were sucked into the washing machine through the portal and Mark Sainsbury was the only man who could understand the beast. Then my dream changed into Sainsbury ranting about Gang problems in New Zealand which lead me to believe that the Mongrel Mob created this machine to recruit prospects. SCARY MAN! epiphone_sg (46

) 3:18 pm, Sat 13 Jun

That explains some of the weird shaped human remains they have unearthed from prehistoric ice. 4:34 pm, Sat 13 Jun

hi the missus has decided this is not a ideal purchase right now sorry i bid an ask for it to be taken away so soon if ya could remove it it would save the headache of the yelling that is now not leaving my head dana_moo (80

) 3:19 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Bid removed. Probably best to consult the wife next time ;P Unless she is stuck in the Jurassic period. 4:48 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Saw an article on TV that said if you poor buckets and buckets of water into it the demon will run away 1kiwihunter (15

) 3:20 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Poor buckets? What happened to them? Have they become hole ridden before their time and are now depressed by their new worthlessness? 4:50 pm, Sat 13 Jun

just saw u on close up i cant beleive u went that close to the washing machine after all that has happend i hope u were alright after that :P twiztid17 (75

) 3:25 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Yeah but I stood behind it, also I felt a lot safer knowing Mark was there. Not only did he had a string tethering him in so if it had got out of hand it would have been him not me. But I was also made comfortable by his proficient Ninja skills. when he karate chopped that bat in half, in the air, with out even flinching I knew he could protect me form virtually anything except sharks. 4:52 pm, Sat 13 Jun

This would make a wicked ride-on toy for outside my goth shop.Urban nightmare ,we could add a few skulls, flames.maybe a little fence around it, wouldnt charge much. rparnell (19

) 3:27 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Hmmmn, the only ride on toys I can image that sort of shop having wouldn't be out the front on the street! 5:34 pm, Sat 13 Jun

A Shame TM got a bit overenthusiastic with their cull, I was looking forward to seeing even the unanswered questions when auction finishes! I wonder if they can be retrieved, or maybe they got sucked down a vortex, too. Have already printed out the first 36 pages of this auction for posterity (and also another copy for our friend Brian who doesn't have a computer). Might have to get some more paper by Thursday. plastic8 (309

) 3:27 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Yeah well it's kind of necessary, 50,000 hits today and it's not even a work day. I had 410 unanswered this morning, lets do the math here :) If I worked 8 hours straight without a single break thats still more than an answer a minute just to break even not counting the influx of new ones during that 8 hours! I would need a room of about 6 me's, banish the thought! 5:42 pm, Sat 13 Jun

My hubby wants to know if he can bring me to your house so I can wash our duvet or some cushions, he figures these items would big enough to open the time portal, and when it opens I will get sucked thru and he says your wife could teach me to iron. He hasn't thought about the logic of having an electric iron in the Jurassic period (obviously) AND he wears overalls to work so I can't understand why he needs the rest of his clothes ironed!! Two thumbs up on the charity work :-) tarns1874 (353

) 3:36 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Did you have a big of an accident? Just throw it away and buy a new one, it's not worth the pain and misery and some things never really 100% come out. 5:44 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Wow did you plan this? You have sold over $2800 of teashirts. With your washing machine you are going to make thousands, but you have worked hard for it! dcave (41

) 3:39 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Thats only 90 t-shirts, I hope we've sold a few more than that. I want to bump into someone I don't know wearing one before the auction finishes, maybe tonight, who knows.... 5:49 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Would the real Mike Loder please stand up? trentnjo (76

) 3:40 pm, Sat 13 Jun

ha ha we'd better leave poor Mike alone or otherwise he's going to embarrass me very badly. I don't know how, or when, but he is a very wily character, anything could happen. 6:08 pm, Sat 13 Jun

The shadow on the front looks like a siloette of the virgin Mary - might protect those worried about getting trapped on the other side? Or give you more for your auction? This auction deserves an award from Trade Me! sunshine29 (695

) 3:41 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Are good at those ink-blot tests? i think the safe answer with those is to say butterfly every time. 6:10 pm, Sat 13 Jun

I watched the bearded man on Friday night and really feel he missed the point completely, esp. when he told the world the dinosaurs lived in the washing machine...his reading skills are obviously not the best. I feel John Campbell would be the man to take your story to the nation and I am sure he would do the burn out if you requested it. :D bernard8 (35

) 3:44 pm, Sat 13 Jun

If John Campbell promised to do a burnout, on camera, and they showed it on campbell live, not only would I be very impressed but I would also donate my driveway. 6:12 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Ha ha ha ha, I laughed so much I had to take a puff of Ventolin!!! It's your fault if I die of asthma!! panatina (25

) 3:49 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Oh dear, thats weighing very heavily on my conscience now...did you know anteaters also eat soft fruit and other insects? Together with Sloths they make up the order of the Pilosa. 6:36 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Thank you, thank you, thank you - laughed so much I had to lie down with my legs in the air and a paper bag on my head just to catch my breath. And excellent work on the drawings and chairty support - you Rock, God. Anyway, my question is; what's your thoughts on Star Wars: The Clone Wars? If I think about it too much I need to lie down again. Love yr wk, may you managed to harness "the force" to get you through to the end of the auction dude. zingabee183 (207

) 3:51 pm, Sat 13 Jun

You need to get a projector for your ceiling... 3:32 pm, Sun 14 Jun

Did you know that DNA stands for the National Association of the Dyslexic? yankiwi05 (11

) 3:51 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Or.... Do Not Answer. 3:32 pm, Sun 14 Jun

I emailed a link to this auction my wife a few days back for a laugh and we are now amazed at how many Q&As there are. She was wondering how some people have so little to do each day (read & write all these) and I remarked to her that she should write a question to you and grab a little fame by adding to this now global phenomenon. Amazingly she took it the wrong way and she's now under the impression that I think she does nothing all day!!! So much for brining joy huh! geordieboi (19

) 3:53 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Buy her a really expensive old washing machine to cheer her up :) 3:55 pm, Sun 14 Jun

Hi where will the money go when someone wins niceguy25 (97

) 3:56 pm, Sat 13 Jun

A black suitcase with a handcuff chain on it just because I've always wanted to. 1:59 am, Mon 15 Jun

I have a theory.....I know an Icelandic guy who worked for Kelvinator in the '80's.....he was a pretty sneaky bugger too.......does the serial number end in 666? spyder (10

) 3:57 pm, Sat 13 Jun

666 is the natural number following 665 and preceding 667 2:01 am, Mon 15 Jun

Those dinosaur pictures would look awesome on t-shirts :) jondo-wrks (34

) 3:57 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Bet you're embarrassed you wrote that now :D Check the seller MrVintage and i think you will be pleasantly surprised. 2:02 am, Mon 15 Jun

crackup man!! tanga3 (208

) 3:59 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Thats a shame, he was probably damaged in transit. Was he insured? 2:02 am, Mon 15 Jun

I just ate a Mandarinl; it had 10 segments. It's a conspiracy. nathandsue (158

) 4:00 pm, Sat 13 Jun

I had two tonight, both had 11.... 2:03 am, Mon 15 Jun

This brand of machine was brilliant. I once accidentally washed a live rat in it along with the wash and it took a real beating i'm sure. But it came out totally undamaged, altho dead. It was 5cm wide, 60cm head to tail and curved and very clean!!! If it has been a fancy new machine I'd have been bitten by an angry live if very wet rat. fms (61

) 4:00 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Totally undamaged......... although dead? I think you'll find the damage was probably critical. 2:04 am, Mon 15 Jun

After Psychologly profiling and evaluating this prehistoric Species, I have come to the conclusion that this magnificent creature seriously needs to reform its Psychotic , behaviour attention seeking ways, such behaviour is usually signs of depression, and should be seeking professional medical help. What have you done to ensure she's getting the treatment she needs? it maybe as simple as antidepressants. toffee5 (543

) 4:00 pm, Sat 13 Jun

I put some saint johns wort on with the last load and all I got was 6kg of tea that smelt like socks and undies. 2:05 am, Mon 15 Jun

Your washing machine reminds me of the movie 'Donnie Darko'. The engine of the air plane goes back in time through a portal and kills Donnie Darko. That movie doesn't make sense to me... the_stain (19

) 4:01 pm, Sat 13 Jun

That movie doesn't make sense to me either but he had a marvelous rabbit costume. They sell rabbit costumes at Geoffs Emporium. My friend Chris bought one because he was sick of thinking of things to wear to dress up parties. It was expensive but he figures he will save money in the long run. 2:07 am, Mon 15 Jun

Hey, I found your stuff in the in the back of a giant sea cave just north of Whitianga on the Coromandel. Unfortunatly due to the awefull stench inside the cave I am unable to have my annual jam sessions!!! also I nearly got my head bitten off by a green and red Dinosaur and was attacked by masses of Hairy Kelp Flies which have been attracted to a pair of brown socks sitting at the back of the cave! Oh yeah , I believe someone was looking for a real live Cave Man? Plenty on the Coromandel ! the-caveman (34

) 4:02 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Just leave it there, I've already put my claim into State and it'll only cuase problems. You can have the socks if you want them, I believe they are 50% polyester and 50% cotton. 2:09 am, Mon 15 Jun

bro, you should give chuck norris a call. he will fix your washing machine good and proper that_crazy_josh (54

) 4:02 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Thats cool, it's probably cheaper if i just use the local guy. 2:09 am, Mon 15 Jun

does it come with the saddle or is that just a tease ;-) julztm (103

) 4:04 pm, Sat 13 Jun

That is an example of the sort of modifications we can do to it upon you winning. I can draw awesome sea-horses on it too if you want a marine theme. 2:10 am, Mon 15 Jun

I stumbled across this item by accident and am now somewhat bewildered and feel the need to ask a couple of questions for everyone to consider! 1) Is there really a turn down in our economy? 2) Are people really that broke these days? 3) How many people really do not have a life? 4) Is there a shortage of washing machines? 5) Is this what TradeMe was ever intended to be used for? 6) Could this result in TradeMe being used to sell rubbish? Happy pondering Dave dayve1 (100

) 4:04 pm, Sat 13 Jun

1). Thats up to you really 2). NOt those folk in Cambridge 3). between 7 and 10 4). Blue 5). TradeMe are still working that out 6). Evidently 2:13 am, Mon 15 Jun

Ive got the clone of this beast. R u keen for a wash-off! Winner takes all xfact (23

) 4:05 pm, Sat 13 Jun

What happened you never showed. 2:14 am, Mon 15 Jun

I laughed so hard at your answers last night, I gave myself the hiccups for about half an hour. Fortunately, I didn't have to stand on my head and drink water to cure them as they went away themselves. Just wondering if you've seen a younger version of yourself in the time portal recently? Or could that disrupt the fabric of history?? jeremy271 (6

) 4:06 pm, Sat 13 Jun

I tried that once the the water came out of my nose and into my eyes. I concluded form the experience its probbaly better just to put up with the hiccups. 2:15 am, Mon 15 Jun

I like baby mosquitos. craigope (493

) 4:06 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Yeah, they are called Larvae which is like larva. Lave is melted rocks. 2:16 am, Mon 15 Jun

Reckon there might be a spill over effect of that machine on this auction. I seem to have lost a few hours reading it... djwatz (128

) 4:07 pm, Sat 13 Jun

I've got a team working on it, we have had several complaints of the same nature. There seems to be a fault somewhere which we are trying to locate. The server may be down between the hours of 3 and 4am while we reboot the time transponder and see if we can get it back into line. Sorry for the inconvenience. 2:18 am, Mon 15 Jun

OK, with that out of the way, why are you selling it? Is there something wrong with it? bluelaser (104

) 4:11 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Nah mate its a minter, quiet as a fullstop and smooth as that awesome shampoo you used to be able to buy with Rachel Hunter on the bottle. 2:19 am, Mon 15 Jun

Your washing machine should go in the ring with and take on Shane Cameron or David Tua marthur1 (14

) 4:13 pm, Sat 13 Jun

It would probably be more exciting than a normal heavyweight fight.... 2:20 am, Mon 15 Jun

For those wanting to know if Mike is as good looking as he is funny ;) Here is the link to the Close Up clip. http://tvnz.co.nz/close-up/beastly-washing-machine-becomes-trade-me-hit-2782022/video dav108 (41

) 4:14 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Conclusion: No 2:20 am, Mon 15 Jun

I'd be interested in your thoughts on the hairballs down plugholes phenomena (a la The Kitchen Sink). Saw you on telly, so know you have short hair, but if your wife had, or current flatmate has, long hair, you may have experienced this horror too. (ps my banned-at-night noisy washing machine was just a pale imitation beside the one I saw on Close Up... Jeesh!) semicolon (30

) 4:14 pm, Sat 13 Jun

I once pulled a hairball out of the shower trap that looked like a hairy foetus. 2:22 am, Mon 15 Jun

my flatmate says if you don't find your wife she will happily come live with you. paula_tim (15

) 4:17 pm, Sat 13 Jun

She can live in the stair cupboard but it's 125 a week and she has to go outside to use the bathroom. Not in our section either. Hey neighbors, its payback time.... 2:24 am, Mon 15 Jun

hahaha---awesome mate....pity some tossers have got in and put bulls**t bids on...... good luck getting them to pay you that much bud.... dazzz1 (475

) 4:20 pm, Sat 13 Jun

What are you implying? Are you saying this machine is less than perfect? 2:25 am, Mon 15 Jun

The way u have worded your auction is fabuous! I think Mark Sansbury should offer you a job in a marketing department at TVNZ! You're a pretty clever guy! Well done! crewscontrol (86

) 4:21 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Did you know there are 21 visible fern motifs on the $20 note? 2:28 am, Mon 15 Jun

Speaking of Prime Numbers ... did you know that some cicadas only hatch every 17, and others every 13 years? Both being prime numbers. This greatly improves the varieties survival against their predators which have a shorter life cycle. Ref: Wikipedia: Cicada. Maybe the 11 mandarin segment thing is some kind of self preservation response? kristos24 (248

) 4:22 pm, Sat 13 Jun

I have an awesome self preservation response, i am selling my washing machine on trade me. 2:31 am, Mon 15 Jun

Do you think we could get 999999 views of this.. wat happens if we go over it.. does trade me allow a million views ?? madmoocow (171

) 4:24 pm, Sat 13 Jun

If we go over 999999 views I would image we will probably definitely get to 1 million. 2:31 am, Mon 15 Jun

My question seems to have escaped into the portal! were you on the computer by the washing machine? Anywho. I said in my last question that My washing machine sounds much like yours, infact when its on spin cycle sometimes i mistake it for an earthquake :D also although mine is "portaless" it is a temperamental piece of whiteware and beeps at me in the morning non-stop. We think its lonely. Maybe i should bid so she has a buddy :D eelyah_21 (75

) 4:24 pm, Sat 13 Jun

I put castor wheels on my bed legs when I lived in wellington so I could sleep through the earth quakes. Worked a treat I recommend it. 2:33 am, Mon 15 Jun

Congrats on getting rid of your greatest nightmare and getting a few grand out of it as well. You must be very convincing, you don't happen to be a car salesman? jazenz (53

) 4:30 pm, Sat 13 Jun

I have two cars for sale, at what point does one sell enough cars to make his a car salesman? 2:34 am, Mon 15 Jun

all your icelandic toilet questions answered.... http://goscandinavia.about.com/od/icelan1/qt/toiletsiceland.htm mattone2 (61

) 4:32 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Never eat yellow snow. 2:35 am, Mon 15 Jun

Hi Ya, I'm considering placing a bid on your machine, would it be suitable for making margaritas, shaken but not agitated (stirred). molly79 (1015

) 4:32 pm, Sat 13 Jun

No not really, it would be unhygienic. 2:40 am, Mon 15 Jun

Big Brother, ie Trademe, seem to be deciding who's questions live and who's questions die regarding this auction. Is that not an abuse of power? balgareth (439

) 4:33 pm, Sat 13 Jun

I think they are wondering how to deal with this monstrosity. With nearly 10,000 watchers on the auction, imagine what the last minute of the auction will be like in bandwidth with everyone refreshing every 2 seconds, it will be madness!! 4:46 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Hey ... Wot about fitting the beast under the bonnet of the CRX in place of the turbo. It would really fly then! You could have a slight problem balancing the wheels though. diggersdog (1232

) 4:36 pm, Sat 13 Jun

I need to wash my hair. 2:46 am, Mon 15 Jun

Man, I hope for your sake, the CIA or the FBI don’t hold you responsible, It appears that a few more of that thing you have there, have been discovered. Are you breeding them, or are they escaping from you, or what’s the story. I just looked at the “more things you may like “ collum down the bottom of your page and it seems there’s now one been found in the Waikato and another in Opotiki. Better up your security. Good luck cliff10 (43

) 4:38 pm, Sat 13 Jun

The Centre for Icelandinc Art? What the heck man? Have they got to you someohow? http://www.cia.is/grants/index.htm 2:52 am, Mon 15 Jun

/b/rother. I have money riding on this fact. Confirm/Deny? Debated sharing the link but decided that this must not be destroyed. You deserve to receive every cent. blyons6666 (25

) 4:41 pm, Sat 13 Jun

You speak in some sort of strange code. Did they send you? 2:52 am, Mon 15 Jun

you must sit here for hours everyday answering these questions... liamemtage09 (6

) 4:41 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Nah I have a room full of people and computers here. Haven't you heard? this is actually just a big marketing ploy for Fisher and Paykel. 2:54 am, Mon 15 Jun

Can I please join the NZAII. I am worried about having to share my house with bjork. She would be worse for your ears and general sanity than your Scary washing machine. sarah2000 (49

) 4:42 pm, Sat 13 Jun

I don't understand why you would share your house with Bjork? 2:56 am, Mon 15 Jun

Damnit, I was on the toilet for the, like, 2 minutes you were on Close Up last night :( Just as well you are too busy with friends watching cement dry, because I didn't go to brunch anyway. Gosh that would have been a bit embarrassing being stood up like that. P.S. My Mum reckons your washing machine is actually a male, and is going through male menopause. I don't really know what that is. I guess it could also be manopause? bmas021 (156

) 4:44 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Did you leave a note on the door for the next person saying "Keep out for the next 40-45 minutes" ? 2:57 am, Mon 15 Jun

Do you think on Thursday 18 Jun at 8:53 pm New Zealand will come to a grinding halt and TradeMe will collapse under the strain of the entire of the country's population sitting around computers up and down the nation glued to this auction? And how will you feel about creating a Quiet Earth out on the streets of every village, town and city in New Zealand - nay, the WORLD? napier01 (62

) 4:48 pm, Sat 13 Jun

The T-1000 is composed of "a mimetic polyalloy" He is more advanced than the T-800 but despite his technological superiority he still cant replicate complex mechanical devices and is limited to stabbing weapons only. 3:02 am, Mon 15 Jun

Maybe you could draw a picture of a psycho pterotactyl with pneumonia visiting a psychiatrist, called Mr Psalm, who blows raspberries and keeps his receipts in a cupboard? Still very scary! cbm (121

) 4:50 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Do you have a lisp? 3:04 am, Mon 15 Jun

...And you have 5,878 fans on Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/s.php?q=scary+washing+machine&init=q&sid=5a894ea23df2d9609e3074 1ee15f2029#/pages/Scary-washing-machine/89255828348?sid=5a894ea23df2d9609e30741ee15f2029&re f=search napier01 (62

) 4:51 pm, Sat 13 Jun

John Campbell has 152. Paul Henry has 13,596. Mark Sainsbury only has 3 :( 3:09 am, Mon 15 Jun

Hey, do you realise you have passed Susan Boyle's record on YouTube???? You would appeal to the younger population, though, as an entertainer or a children's book writer you would do well. Have you ever tried stand-up comedy or Kareoke?? barbelles (141

) 4:52 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Thats weird, I think this comment was from the future as I have not yet put a video on youtube. Its that Time Transponder thing again, it's really playing up. 3:11 am, Mon 15 Jun

Holy Jesus! You Are Awesome! You Should Get A Good Return On That One, Help Another Fellow Out? http://www.trademe.co.nz/Browse/Listing.aspx?id=224196884&ed=true rika319 (34

) 4:57 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Your shift key must wear out a lot faster than other people's shift keys. 3:12 am, Mon 15 Jun

so that's why there's no dinosaurs around anymore - not asteroids, not an ice age and i knew it wasn't climate change - they'd be too tough to die out to that nerd climate change. they're all in your magic wishing machine 2blunt (32

) 4:58 pm, Sat 13 Jun

No, sharks ate them. They are not in the washing machine, that is a common misconception due to CloseUp's reporting, the dinosaurs are THROUGH the washing machine not in it. 3:13 am, Mon 15 Jun

"Kelvinator Salvation" - isn't that a Neil Diamond song? abby2007 (49

) 4:59 pm, Sat 13 Jun

I certainly hope not and I am not going to Google Neil Diamond either as a matter of self preservation. 3:14 am, Mon 15 Jun

Dont worry about answering this as I would hate to be a contributing factor in your claim to ACC for RSI, not to mention the ongoing physio and rehabilitation costs......anyway, I just want to say that I think you are a very talented (albeit somewhat disturbed) person and I want to congratulate you on your sense of humour and your outstanding efforts in answering all these questions! You deserve every penny you get for this machine! And a medal from the queen. Enjoy your sleep afterwards! bubbles121 (762

) 5:00 pm, Sat 13 Jun

I might se if she can send me a bottle top medal, i'll mail her some instructions on how to make one and a bottle top as i don't want british beer. I bet she's pretty bored and some craft activities will do her a world of good. An active mind is a healthy mind I say. 3:16 am, Mon 15 Jun

Mike, if after the TradeMe auction closes and you still think you need counselling, try re-reading your auction questions. I'm sure you would still be laughing a year from now. I saw the story on Close Up last night and Mark Sainsbury said the page views were over 200,000, When I started reading your questions there were 341,000, now there's over 345,000. TradeMe should pay you royalties for all the questions. (Make sure you count the ones that they remove) Can't wait to see the end price. jem65 (112

) 5:00 pm, Sat 13 Jun

You hear that Trademe? 3:17 am, Mon 15 Jun

I had the exact same style washing machine, xcept i murdered mine. Broke its shaft trying to get the agitator off and the nice F/P man took it away and replaced it with a brand spanking new one that is the most useless washing machine ever. Okay so the old one made a bit of noise ok alot and it liked to break dance and try and escape the laundry, but oh how I miss the way it washed my clothes. Are you sure your doing the right thing?????? jen.sarah (204

) 5:08 pm, Sat 13 Jun

I think the lesson here is don't try to take the agitator off your washing machine. It probably works heaps better with it on anyway. 3:19 am, Mon 15 Jun

My neighbour has one of these beasts.He calls it his hadron collider. It is freaking awful.I wondered what the hell the noise reverberating from his house was the first time I heard it. He wants to keep his "hadron collider" though...go figure! I watched the story last night and was nearly doubled up on the floor. I hope the winner honours the auction.... :) mrsblobby6 (61

) 5:08 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Ironically I think the hadron collider is remarkably quiet. Maybe some atmospheric noise like an awesome cave and nothing more. I hope I haven't ruined is fun. 3:20 am, Mon 15 Jun

I just ate a mandarin with 10 segments - I feel ripped off, does it have anything to do with your washing machine? sennytar (591

) 5:08 pm, Sat 13 Jun

The seller still has not got back to me about that jute sack. 3:21 am, Mon 15 Jun

Have you Considered Donating this "monster" to the zoo? sadface (158

) 5:11 pm, Sat 13 Jun

I rang the zoo to find out. The lady had to talk to her supervisor. 3:23 am, Mon 15 Jun

What if the satanic spirits have attached themselves onto other household items, i.e your deepfreeze?! So whoever buys this beast, will their household items become possessed also? I hope the counselling helps. Take care, look after yourself. monique07 (56

) 5:14 pm, Sat 13 Jun

We should be fine, I don't have a deep freeze any more. Ironically i think it got sucked into the last ice age. 3:24 am, Mon 15 Jun

Mike, in all the Terminator movies the actual device used to create the portals is never shown...maybe the machines are using Kelvinators seeing as all who travel through them arrive naked??? whoop4 (172

) 5:14 pm, Sat 13 Jun

That is an interesting observation you have made. 3:25 am, Mon 15 Jun

I used to be the designer in Fisher & Paykel's Special Build Dept & I know your machine. Look on the back you & find the special black Serial Plate with a black serial number (SATAN666-666). I notice from the picture it's missing the Special Function Selector knob, no doubt some helpful serviceman thought it redundant. The machine is stuck between 2 special cycles, 'Time Travel' & 'Release Hell'. Not uncommon. Choose Drip Dry & it should operate normally again. Regards Alan 'Poltergeist' Parsons crazyal (273

) 5:15 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Has anyone in the world ever selected Drip-Dry on a washing machine intentionally? I cant think of a single reason why anyone would, the spin cycle is what I live for. 3:31 am, Mon 15 Jun

So essentially what you are saying happened to your wife is ... Kelvin ate her???!!!??? trace1972 (36

) 5:17 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Why did the girl fall off the swing? .......Because she was a quadruple amputee. 3:33 am, Mon 15 Jun

Have you realized that you are infact destroying the world that we know of. by selling this you have given skynet the technology they need!!!! sarah told me to tell you! sadface (158

) 5:19 pm, Sat 13 Jun

Like a 'psychic' (silent P) you have conveniently chosen quite a common name in the hope that I will have some sort of relationship with someone of the same name therefore assuming this person is a shared connection between you and I making us seem like friends and making me feel I can trust you. I see through your deception techniques, Icelander. 3:36 am, Mon 15 Jun

Ever thought of employing some form of evil henchmen/goons to counteract the evil scariness of said scary washing machine thereby forcing it to open an evil vortex/rift in the space time continuum and forcing it to return to its evil realm of evil?. ideas that may help: Doctor Robotnik, Skeletor, Megatron, That Black Power Ranger or Gargamel?. ive gathered an elite team of early 80's/90's villians as i feel that given the age of the Kelvinator...they are the only ones for enough for the job tonkanz (17

) 5:24 pm, Sat 13 Jun

I would say probbaly only 30-40% of peopel reading this got past around about the 'evil realm of evil bit'. Its a pity because 6 words on you say Skeletor and Skeletor is awesome. Originally his name was just plain Skeleton but the guy who wrote on his birth certificate got a bit lazy on the 'n'. This worked out quite well in the end because I don't think Skeletor's career would have panned out the same if he was just called Skeleton. 3:40 am, Mon 15 Jun

Seller Comment: If Seller Helenclarke1947 actually does want to put a $5000 bid in please leave a comment here and Trademe will contact you. 6:42 pm, Sat 13 Jun

It think youwould really enjoy 'Garth Marenghi's Darkplace' it deals with some similar themes, it will prorbably make you feel understood and far better equiped to deal with possessed appliances. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L1qT_zwZYBg&feature=related amykelly (166

) 3:12 pm, Sun 14 Jun

Its my iron!! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RcKxvYkD4Vk&feature=related 3:31 pm, Sun 14 Jun

Seller Comment: Lots of people are asking where to get the t-shirts from, here is the link to MrVintage's trademe store... http://www.trademe.co.nz/Members/Listings.aspx?member=694887 4:17 pm, Sun 14 Jun

I think the shadow on the front is David Bain's shadow. I can just make out his head in the corner. Would you consider delivery to Napier? boutros (72

) 5:05 pm, Sun 14 Jun

I had a terrible dream about the washing machine coming alive last night, it had arms and claws and teeth and everything. It spoke to me but all I could hear was angry noise. I think someone told it it was being auctioned off and it's not happy about it. It's etched in my mind, I think I will draw a picture. 5:39 pm, Mon 15 Jun

when you click on 'more stuff you might like' it brings up a whole lot of washing machines! what's with that? maharahara (337

) 5:48 pm, Sun 14 Jun

Its because it knows what you like, the last 20 times you visited trade me you looked at a silly washing machine auction. Now your profile has been permanently effected. 5:40 pm, Mon 15 Jun

I know what kind of car john campbell drives and it is not a cortina, he did a skid outside my house thats how i know and its a matte black 1988 nissan cefiro number plate TL8107........... hope this helps sierra7 (135

) 6:08 pm, Sun 14 Jun

Turners auctions evaluated his car's value at $650. TV3 must be running pretty lean at the moment, poor old John. 5:43 pm, Mon 15 Jun

I'm not all that technically minded but surely somehow you with your inventive quilifications could harness the power of this beasty machine and use it against the Icelandic invasion. lollie_wgtn (223

) 6:11 pm, Sun 14 Jun

Too risky, should I be taken down in battle it could fall into their hands and then the war would be over. But not in a good way. 5:44 pm, Mon 15 Jun

forget selling the machine man and just write books.ud make a bloody fortune!!!!!xxx cocyo (52

) 6:16 pm, Sun 14 Jun

I just did my best drawing ever. Its the washing machine trying to suck me in and a dinosaur popping it's head out to eat me. 5:51 pm, Mon 15 Jun

forget selling the machine man and just write books.ud make a bloody fortune!!!!!xxx cocyo (52

) 6:16 pm, Sun 14 Jun

Do you suffer from acute amnesia? or obsessive compulsive disorder.... 5:52 pm, Mon 15 Jun

I just joined the scary washing machine facebook group! you have 8,206 fans! sheepgurl (346

) 6:25 pm, Sun 14 Jun

Imagine how windy it is in there! Wow! How big are the fans? Are they those little pocket size ones or the big old ones like Deka used to have before they got air-conditioning? 5:54 pm, Mon 15 Jun

Do you think the machine shock the laundry so much it openned the man hole cover in the roof (portal) and the dinosaurs were actually the spiders in your ceiling space? Maybe the wife and the iron are up there? Please be carefull looking as this may be a great excuse for the washing machine to suck you in! tamj1 (18

) 6:30 pm, Sun 14 Jun

Did you know at the end of 'The Neverending Story' Sebastian yells "MOOOOON CHIIIILD" out the window? 5:58 pm, Mon 15 Jun

I'm gna need your washing machine to wash my undies, cause I just shat myself reading that description slimsaki (13

) 6:43 pm, Sun 14 Jun

Ok my name is David Peacock and i live at 27 Oakdale Rd in Westharbour. Come over whenever you want. 6:01 pm, Mon 15 Jun

Please dont sell to a guy named Slaemur Ulfur. I rented a flat off him, used the washing machine and ended up here two years earlier. That might not be his real name though as he used to lie, pretended he was from some made up place called Reykjavik or something. crumb (18

) 6:55 pm, Sun 14 Jun

Never trust anyone who comes from a place where 66% of the letters in the place name are consonants. 6:04 pm, Mon 15 Jun

Why did the plane crash?...... Because the pilot was a washing machine. deetrain (89

) 6:57 pm, Sun 14 Jun

Oh I get it ha ha, washing machines cant fly planes ha ha thats a great one I'll have to remember it so I can tell it to other people. 6:05 pm, Mon 15 Jun

What do you about lead? gilligan4 (31

) 6:58 pm, Sun 14 Jun

What do I know? about Lead? .... Lead trioxide is a bright orange powder, i only know this because mum would never let me lick the yummy orange paint off the fence when it was being built. 6:09 pm, Mon 15 Jun

way to go mate - you must have the record price for a crap washing machine. Your sales method might get picked up by Sachi and Sachi (or there are some real suckers out there) - either way good for you! joey16 (6

) 6:59 pm, Sun 14 Jun

Dont worry, Saachi and Saachi is quiet hard to spell. 6:11 pm, Mon 15 Jun

Do you want some ritalin? gilligan4 (31

) 6:59 pm, Sun 14 Jun

Do you you want he Castle Greyskull Playset as seen in the following advertisement? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_-s0-vGTN8w Yeah me too. 6:14 pm, Mon 15 Jun

FENOMINUL!!!!.................and without using the Silent P!!!. Now my printer has run out of ink trying to print this out for a friend who doesn't have a computer.... 61holden (231

) 7:03 pm, Sun 14 Jun

Just jot it down with a pencil, printer ink is more expensive than gold. No it actually is. 5:26 pm, Mon 15 Jun

Hey man, Great work! I have just copied and pasted all the Q & A's into a 60 page word document for a little light bedtime reading as I have been glued to the computer screen for the last 2 hours and haven't even gotten a quarter of the way through it! And, you still have 242 unanswered questions!!! Power to you man! You should get this whole manuscript published. petesheed (52

) 7:17 pm, Sun 14 Jun

What picture do you have on your bookmark, mine is also a ruler which i have never really understood, what is it there to measure? Book thickness read over time? 6:18 pm, Mon 15 Jun

OMG - do you have a blog? If not you should get one started as soon as the demonic machine departs your abode...You inspire! collnz (71

) 7:18 pm, Sun 14 Jun

My friend Sue who makes up jokes to tell her friends said blog stands for "Big Load Of Gossip" Oh man we cracked up when she said that one. 6:21 pm, Mon 15 Jun

Hey man, You could totally do a childrens picture book on all of this!!! and use your dinosaur pictures as illustrations! would be wiked! find a publisher! and you're sorted!! Pass on the % of the profits to me dude :) rwp_4 (57

) 7:23 pm, Sun 14 Jun

I washed my hair today, it's much better now. 6:24 pm, Mon 15 Jun

Please please write a kiddies book about this. I have 11 children and now we are no longer allowed to smack them need to put the fear into them somehow. Imagine how many parents you will be helping out. jameslowe (68

) 7:46 pm, Sun 14 Jun

Did you accidentally press the 1 button twice? 6:28 pm, Mon 15 Jun

I really need a break ie holiday....any chance I could use your machine for one spin in hope the portal lets me in to get away - I'll go find your wife for the favour! Thanks for the entertainment, it's nice to know the older generation still has an imagination! london2006 (24

) 7:48 pm, Sun 14 Jun

Take some muesli bars with you and a water bottle and be home by 4:30pm. 6:31 pm, Mon 15 Jun

Are you all mad????!!!! casper122 (33

) 7:59 pm, Sun 14 Jun

Yes, fun isn't it? :D 6:32 pm, Mon 15 Jun

hi - i have a very serious question to ask of your washing machine and since you seem to be able to communicate easily with the thing - can you please find out what it has done to 2 pair of my husbands work trousers?? i know it has sucked them in - i want them back - no excuses just get the damn thing to return them he needs them or else he is just going to have to go to work in his undies and that is not a good look - it will cause more trauma than anyone can realise i cant afford a councillor mudpyz (242

) 8:03 pm, Sun 14 Jun

Is your husband hideously disfigured from the waste down from wading through a river of toxic acid? I suppose it was funny at the time with everyone cheering him on but I bet he regrets it now. 6:33 pm, Mon 15 Jun

Hmm. I just read Kelvinator 25:17 (you know, the one Samuel L Jackson read on Pulp Fiction)- And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know my name is the Kelvinator when I lay my vengeance upon thee....Any thoughts on what this could mean? jamesthecarman (48

) 8:05 pm, Sun 14 Jun

I think it means someone has been playing a prank on you. 6:34 pm, Mon 15 Jun

OH MY GOD..............do you wanna sell my stuff for me..... ayisha_nz (71

) 8:11 pm, Sun 14 Jun

Are you a drug-lord? You do realise people can read this right? 6:36 pm, Mon 15 Jun

Hi... I think your machine probably relates in some way to a little bit in all of us who've had 'possessed' machines in the past, or who a currently still suffering! Clearly by the avalanche of mail you've received is testimony to this. You should be writing science fiction and obviously illustrating the stories yourself too :) But I do have a question... is someone REALLY going to pay over $2000 for your machine? lol montana007 (56

) 8:16 pm, Sun 14 Jun

Its not just a washing machine it's an inter-time portal with the added benefit of drowning out the kid's screaming and washing the pong out of your socks. 6:44 pm, Mon 15 Jun

Wow! What a story...I laughed, I cried, I chewed off all my nails (fingers AND toes!) My kids thought that I had gone mad and my husband banned me from Trademe for the rest of the day! As a mum of 5 kids, I do an awful lot of washing...our machine does eat socks, but only 1 of each pair-absolutely no personality though. Your machine has character...I have actually used it to discipline my children with...seriously! They saw you on tv. I told them to clean their rooms or I'd bid on it! IT WORKED! daveoam (190

) 8:19 pm, Sun 14 Jun

Careful they might make you follow through!! 6:45 pm, Mon 15 Jun

Excuse me, but i actually lost my Kelvinator in 1985 and there were some strange marks left in the laundry, i'm just wondering if perhaps this is a coincedence or yours has simply appeared from a portal? Sorry for any inconvience, i also think there was a full box of persil too? pumacricket (33

) 8:33 pm, Sun 14 Jun

I swapped it at a farmers market for a bag full of dried beans. The man was a little shifty though and said he'd lost the papers. 6:49 pm, Mon 15 Jun

That is one loud washing machine, saw it on close up how do you even live with that thing, you got any weapons of choice to keep you safe from it every night? kelichbeke (12

) 8:36 pm, Sun 14 Jun

Stairs, it is rubbish on stairs. 10:25 pm, Tue 16 Jun

however I have added an image of another possible customization option for people who like horses. i cant see the image _christina (109

) 8:40 pm, Sun 14 Jun

I cant see very well in the dark. I have a glow in the dark watch, I get real confused if it's on upside down. 10:28 pm, Tue 16 Jun

You poor, poor bastard. Doesn't it annoy you that so many people are asking pointless questions not taking into account that it must take a toll on you? They're so selfish. I wish they could see what they are doing to you. Especially those people that write questions that go on and on and on with out actually asking anything. Icanhazdinosaur? Kthx. jagos (61

) 8:48 pm, Sun 14 Jun

I am detecting a subtle irony in your post. 10:29 pm, Tue 16 Jun

i wonder what would happen when the hits go over 999999... arguably best chance yet!! lol laythalhasani (24

) 8:50 pm, Sun 14 Jun

What are your thoughts on Guavas? 10:31 pm, Tue 16 Jun

he shot your iron. Couldn't beleive it. doesn't that just piss you off? mtg2 (18

) 9:00 pm, Sun 14 Jun

You should see how big my yukka palm is getting with all this rain. 10:33 pm, Tue 16 Jun

Would you consider a trade for David Bain's blood stained sweater? Cheers. If this offer does not interest you? How about a (bright) yellow highlighter? Barely used. chris_99 (95

) 9:01 pm, Sun 14 Jun

Enough with the Bain jokes already but the highlighter sounds awesome! is it round or square? 10:34 pm, Tue 16 Jun

I'm glad you've taken time off to get some sleep. After all you've been through, travelling through space and time and being terrorised by dinosaurs and stuff, then to stay up all night answering questions - you must be a wreck. If you make it to Wellington in the next day or two, do come round for a cup of coffee and some banana cake (just out the oven). rachel777 (57

) 9:10 pm, Sun 14 Jun

I don't really remember what sleep is like, I think I remember something about black. The colour black...sorry I dont know. 10:35 pm, Tue 16 Jun

Re the 11 segments in a mandarin thing... did you know that a cob of corn ALWAYS has an odd number of rows of kernels around it? EXPLAIN THAT! (do-do-do-doo *Twilight Zone music thingy trails eerily off...* bruce2727 (13

) 9:27 pm, Sun 14 Jun

I am the best in my family at eating corn fast. Do you remember those disney birds who used to mow the corn back and ding at the end like a typewriter? 10:36 pm, Tue 16 Jun

I so needed a laugh, u just made my day. Thanx :-) marlz11 (77

) 9:36 pm, Sun 14 Jun

Can you use oven cleaner on a bbq? 10:37 pm, Tue 16 Jun

My washing machine has broken ): I unfortunately am only able to wash my clothes at my neighbours, I was wondering if you'd care to share your washing machine. I can bake cakes :D pattersons06 (67

) 9:40 pm, Sun 14 Jun

.....ok more about the cakes..... 10:38 pm, Tue 16 Jun

Legend man u crack me up. white_cross (16

) 9:44 pm, Sun 14 Jun

I recommend lanolin or hemp oil, it's wonderful stuff and really softens the palms. 10:39 pm, Tue 16 Jun

Do you come with the washing machine? :D missl-iss (6

) 9:57 pm, Sun 14 Jun

Only very briefly. 10:39 pm, Tue 16 Jun

Howly shit, that washing machines got nothing on your Iron! lucieee (101

) 10:03 pm, Sun 14 Jun

You said a rude word. Potty mouth. 10:40 pm, Tue 16 Jun

Perhaps you could borrow someones killer attack dog and see if that can take on your washing machine. Killer attack dogs have proven to be more gruntie than goldfish!!!! kev. (19

) 10:05 pm, Sun 14 Jun

Yes I can see your logic there. Killer Attack Dog vs Goldfish, I know where I'd put my money. 10:41 pm, Tue 16 Jun

Hey man this is awsome , if i was you id be saving all these and publishing them in a book , youd make a killing johne4 (15

) 10:09 pm, Sun 14 Jun

I'd like to see those long staplers more readily available and at a more affordable price. 10:42 pm, Tue 16 Jun

I cant find the tv remote, what do you think the suck range is on that portal of yours? 4trav (18

) 10:14 pm, Sun 14 Jun

Sorry it's still in my pocket, I'll post it to you. 10:43 pm, Tue 16 Jun

Would the vibration from this machine have anything to do with the 'Cadbury Eyebrows' ad? Ironically I saw it at the cinema before Terminator Salvation. I was scared. Like the dinosaurs. A portal was opened up to a bad advertising campaign from which I will never recover. I got goosebumps. On my gooch. I guess they'd be goochbumps. Not like growths, though they may come later. With this device we can stop the ad by travelling back to 1984 & killing its mother, chocolate, before it it even born. liquidgroovey55 (36

) 10:16 pm, Sun 14 Jun

I've read that about four times now and I'm pretty sure you are saying kid's eyebrows give you goosebumps on your gooch. I don't know if you should be allowed on the internet. 10:44 pm, Tue 16 Jun

just wondering if the wife is still on the other side ?. if she gets found by a caveman, i hope he drags her home by the hair. you know what will happen if she gets draged by the feet moose450 (70

) 10:17 pm, Sun 14 Jun

I once fell off a skateboard going down a steep hill at about 40km/h and landed on one cheek. Never land on one cheek, if you are flying through the air and you have a choice, choose to land on your face over one cheek. You will thank me. 10:49 pm, Tue 16 Jun

Would Chuck Norris or The washing machine win in a fight? kba100 (40

) 10:25 pm, Sun 14 Jun

I think Chuck's overconfidence would be his undoing. 10:49 pm, Tue 16 Jun

this is absolutly brilliant and fascinating.... want to buy some of your t shirts... but kids size, there must be a huge market for cool kids tshirts and a kids book... i dont know what you did for a real job before this but your life is about to change, chricky this is going to go BIG!!! bloody well done. feefee75 (73

) 10:36 pm, Sun 14 Jun

When you are shaking small paint tins, ensure to put your thumbs over the lid. 10:55 pm, Tue 16 Jun

My vote for best response is from longsocks: kelvin ate her - priceless! Did you try sending the machine to Iceland to stave off the invasion? If it worked it would free up some time for inventing as you wouldn't need to learn Icelandic anymore. Another option is to loan it to Transit for the tunnel. The geotechnical engineers may discover that the lava flow in the area is actually concrete. And did you know that Jura is in Switzerland? If the portal goes there I'm in - as good as Waiuku. fburling (160

) 10:39 pm, Sun 14 Jun

That would be like saying, oh hey evil skeleton warlord form evil land, here take my enchanted sword of etherial light so you can make your way home though the darkness and don't trip on the corpses of my loved ones. 10:58 pm, Tue 16 Jun

Seeing u got HUNDREDS of comments/questions to your auction, do u plan on printing it out and keep? Cos i think it's hilarious and worth keeping since that the time for you to part from the machine is nearing. All the best!! brushstrokz (117

) 11:07 pm, Sun 14 Jun

Have you got as far as printing it yet? Did you back out once you thought about the ink involved? 10:59 pm, Tue 16 Jun

Hi there Mike,are you still with us or has it got to much for you?couldnt blame you for having some time out.its been a great auction and no one could blame you for having a break,cheers bigs007 (380

) 11:17 pm, Sun 14 Jun

But secretly you do, I have to do this in stints. I think I have an auction gland which needs time to replenish after use. 11:01 pm, Tue 16 Jun

How to translate alien text? Google a good-looking word taken from it, like Tvättmaskinernas (now this one is gorgeous!). The web sites with that word end in .se, so this is Swedish (probably an Icelandic trying to cover their tracks, not too smart though, they picked another scandinavian language). Then go to http://dictionary.reference.com/translate?jss=0 and lift the veil. Alternatively, you might want to keep the mystery intact.... gratou (204

) 11:22 pm, Sun 14 Jun

Can you translate this for me it came in the mail......... In 2008 Clark won the seat with 59.29% of the votes, clearly ahead of the closest contender, National candidate Ravi Musuku who gained 28.84% of the votes. In terms of overall party votes the Labour Party took 42.60%, National 35.66% and the Green Party 11.00%. Clark also took out the 2005 election capturing a majority of the 31,431 valid electorate votes winning 66.55% of them. 11:03 pm, Tue 16 Jun

It doesn't really sound like you want your wife back... She is trapped in the washing machine.. and your giving it away .. You will never get her back! solomalc (1

) 11:33 pm, Sun 14 Jun

Meh....I lost my pocket knife too which I was a bit gutted about. I think I left it at Kevin's but he said he never saw it. I bet he's lying and he's coloured it black with a vivid. 11:05 pm, Tue 16 Jun

Oh and I hate the pizza hut swirl. Why not a swirl on a burger ? Or a pie swirl? Or a scone one? Blasphemy I say. As if the pineapple sacrilege wasn't enough. gratou (204

) 11:33 pm, Sun 14 Jun

How is it that spongebob lives in a pineapple?. Do you think the area was recently flooded in a significant seismic event? 11:06 pm, Tue 16 Jun

Seller Comment: SHARK AND UNDERTAKER CHARITY AUCTION ADDED!! Listing Number 224483975 This ones a double set! Raising money for HeartKids, an NZ foundation helping the 600 Kiwi babies born every year with life threatening heart problems. www.heartkids.org.nz Shark and Undertaker t-shirts available through TradeMe seller MrVintage just type 'mrvintage' in the search bar under 'All listings' 11:34 pm, Sun 14 Jun

Looks like you iron is useless now, hope your wifes going to be okay without it :):) sk8er11 (17

) 11:39 pm, Sun 14 Jun

Yeah the wife is actually WITH the iron so.... 11:07 pm, Tue 16 Jun

HellO. A friend of mine, I shall call him Tin Man, features in many adventures - one of which recently involved him running away from a Rampant Washing Machine!!!!! (You know it's terrifying because I used 5 exclamation marks) Should you want to risk evoking more painful memories then have a look at http://tonycribb.co.nz/index.php/index/node/5/Shop (the bottom right thumbnail) It seems no-one is safe from Machines that Wash Cottons and Delicates, unless you shut the laundry door. superorangeboy (63

) 11:42 pm, Sun 14 Jun

I loved Iron Man I thought it was a great action film. I especially liked the bit when he made that awesome suit out of junk in the desert and flew away from the bad guys. Why didn't anyone else think of that? 11:09 pm, Tue 16 Jun

Dude you got to see Sainbury's mo up close! Do you feel privileged? Did you fight the urge to touch it? john001 (141

) 11:48 pm, Sun 14 Jun

He let me stroke it sensually. I even crooned a little bit when I did it. It was well weird but I'm glad I did it. 5:34 pm, Mon 15 Jun

No need to respond, I'm sure you already have RSI. You asked: "Honestly, does any one know the point of a silent P ? " Yes, it's so you don't wake everyone in the house when you go to the loo at 2am. fatface2 (225

) 11:49 pm, Sun 14 Jun

The only thing quieter is peeing the bed. Do you want to buy my old mattress?, it's in quite good condition... 11:10 pm, Tue 16 Jun

You are gonna be a living legend in NZ my friend. Best of luck with the dishwasher and good on ya for the charity support! aorrta (26

) 12:20 am, Mon 15 Jun

Are your dishes quite chipped? What cycle do you use or do you just put them in with the towels for padding. You must get sick of egg white and olive stones in the lint catcher. 11:12 pm, Tue 16 Jun

hey just looking at the pics, which we all love by the way, but why dose you shark look like a fallen over undertaker??? no-gravity (40

) 12:21 am, Mon 15 Jun

No the Undertaker looks like a jumping shark. The undertaker sleeps standing up. 11:15 pm, Tue 16 Jun

I quite like that stegosaurus dino as a tee - but orange and green aren't really my colours. Do you think you could replace with dusky pink / burgundy / blue reds and blue hues that tone in. thanks very much. deez9 (39

) 12:33 am, Mon 15 Jun

Fashion emergency Sabastion! 11:16 pm, Tue 16 Jun

Can you smell burning? perpetua (132

) 12:42 am, Mon 15 Jun

Yeah, what do you think it is? Sort of a bit like burnt bacon mixed with fish-oil and a little bit of ants under a magnifying glass. 11:18 pm, Tue 16 Jun

just... wow nice going hope 2 many people dont copy u stanley_kyle (29

) 1:51 am, Mon 15 Jun

I sometimes wish I had longer fingers. Imagine what you could do with really long fingers. I could lie in bed and fix myself a sandwich downstairs at the same time. I could throw away the TV remote, open the front door from the lounge. The possibilities are limitless. Thats all I can think of. 11:23 pm, Tue 16 Jun

nope Im not embarrassed, I wrote that before any mention of t-shirts had been made on your auction. :) good luck. jondo-wrks (34

) 8:01 am, Mon 15 Jun

Oh ok so I'm just really slow then.... 11:25 pm, Tue 16 Jun

Are you on something??? I think you need help yeahright0 (185

) 8:12 am, Mon 15 Jun

Its a chair, but curiously it is exactly the same chair as described in the extremely dangerous chair auction, I'm ok though I can can get in and out of it fine. But thanks for your concern. 11:26 pm, Tue 16 Jun

Just wanting some advice... I see you like counting mandarin segments too! I have decided that 90% of them are odd numbered. Whta do you find? vorn10 (26

) 8:22 am, Mon 15 Jun

I don't want to jump to conclusions on such important matters. 11:27 pm, Tue 16 Jun

You are really going to get the counselling you need lol. Love your auction I haven’t laughed this hard in ages!!!! Good luck in actually selling it =) who-knows (366

) 9:11 am, Mon 15 Jun

Counseling is not cheap. Unless you use your hairdresser and kill two birds with one stone. I find it's cheaper to go to the barber if you just want a normal haircut. 11:29 pm, Tue 16 Jun

Damn, you busted me on the chainsaw,do you work for the Police??.if you do,youll take a bribe so if the insurance pays up you can have one of the Ming Dynasty vases, that should get the bidding up to about 40 million. I hate vases, it left a water ring on my Steinway Grand Piano which also got eaten by the portal.Id better get onto AMI, this is going to hurt them but its for a good cause.My cat has pinched my EFTPOS number and withdrawn all my cash for catnip toys..so I need a valid claim! oilystair (20

) 9:12 am, Mon 15 Jun

Cats, they crack me up every time with their zany antics. 11:30 pm, Tue 16 Jun

We had a washing machine like that .... in fact we had an earthquake - everyone else ran around shouting "earthquake, earthquake", I ran around shouting "its the washing machine ....." Earthquake won - 4.5richter! I wonder if the spin cycle and earthquake had anything to do with each other ?? billda (146

) 9:16 am, Mon 15 Jun

I think what you are describing may have been an earthquake but it worked out well as it saved you from any unnecessary panic. 11:31 pm, Tue 16 Jun

Facebook Fan no. 9287 here. This is absurd. I am meant to be looking for a job not wasting my time with this frivolity! Apart from RSI what else is there in this for you? I understand if you are not working at the moment then ACC will not cover you for this affliction. Be careful eh? We want to see you back. Just thinking what else in the house could be a noisy threat. The dumpster? wynmead (58

) 9:27 am, Mon 15 Jun

Toe-typing, once I get good enough I should be able to work in alternating shifts. 11:32 pm, Tue 16 Jun

I've never had so much fun with a listing, and it needs to live on. So do you think we could ask Trademe to publish it....with all Q & A of course? It'd be a great fundraiser. Just call it Big Sucky or Gremlins BC...What do you think? catlg (591

) 10:01 am, Mon 15 Jun

I think the names are a little left-field but I don't know.... 11:35 pm, Tue 16 Jun

apparently u can get t-shirts with the dinosaurs on where can we get these baxterd (19

) 11:40 am, Mon 15 Jun

Search for trademe seller MrVintage under 'all listings' 12:29 pm, Mon 15 Jun

Seller Comment: The Tyrannosaurus t-shirt is now up and available through the trademe seller MrVintage, just search 'MrVintage' under 'All listings' 12:34 pm, Mon 15 Jun

Seller Comment: Seller added 1 photo 2:46 pm, Mon 15 Jun

Seller Comment: I have just discovered something that frankly I find disturbing.....photo added.....can this be a co-incidence? I don't think so. When it's running, no-one can hear you scream.... 2:50 pm, Mon 15 Jun

Did you realise according to the Guiness book of records Iceland is the greatest consumer of electricity per person? maybe they are training washing machines. barbieandken (435

) 5:13 pm, Mon 15 Jun

And not only that but due to the subterranean thermal activity in iceland the electricity is provided free to all inhabitants. Iceland uses volcanic heat to run it's power-stations potentially draining the earth's life source. Their plan is to extinguish and cool the earths core so the whole planet freezes just like on Batman 3. I'm pretty sure thats why it's cold in Iceland because they don't have much lava left. They are interested in NZ because we have heaps left and they are jealous. 5:23 pm, Mon 15 Jun

Seller Comment: Seller added 1 photo 3:51 am, Tue 16 Jun

Sorry to add to your question answering woes, but do you know if any of the money from the sales of the dinosaur tee shirts are going to be given to Starship or other Charities? takagirl27 (20

) 1:05 pm, Tue 16 Jun

Yes 10% goes to Starship :) Donated by mrvintage 3:24 pm, Tue 16 Jun

Seller Comment: We ask, they deliver, by popular demand MrVintage brings you the original "Scary Washing Machine" dinosaurs. MrVintage had to fight my mum for it, she put up a pretty good fight too but she was ultimately outnumbered and was defeated in the 3rd round. Check out Trademe seller MrVintage 's listings. 3:18 pm, Tue 16 Jun

Seller Comment: Facebook fans of Scary Washing Machine, check the homepage and events section of the Scary Washing Machine fan-page. There's a surprise for you :D 3:21 pm, Tue 16 Jun

theres a new guy out there called mike4 who no one has heard of before, but that doesnt matter coz man can he natter hed sell ice to the eskimos for sure. giving heaps of money to charity he answers all questions with clarity, his wit is so sweet never missing a beat surely hes done this before?! i cry tears of laughter reading some of his answers im rolling around on the floor! u must return dont disappear we luv u more than frothy beer! xxxxx cocyo (52

) 11:10 pm, Tue 16 Jun

I love limericks. I have no idea how to make a limerick without it turning rude. Well done. 11:41 pm, Tue 16 Jun

I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid Aoccdrnig to rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm holdey350 (85

) 3:55 pm, Wed 17 Jun

Actually you will find that it only works if the letters at each end of the word remains in the same place. Heres the same thing completely scrambled and its unreadable...... I tdnuocl eleeive atth I ldouc yulaclta desduatnrn twha..... you get the picture. 4:23 pm, Wed 17 Jun

Im sure when i checked this earlier it was at $2630... My washer is just as loud and moves along the floor and turns itself around too! Out of curioustity how many bidders/watchers have u got on this? emmajane2 (130

) 4:01 pm, Wed 17 Jun

Turns out they were kids having a laugh. Were you laughing? I was in hysterics... 4:25 pm, Wed 17 Jun

It's all been in the name of charity, For which Mike has provided clarity, Ahead of him was a mammoth task, With all the questions people did ask. He's done extremely well, That we all can tell, A guy with a huge heart, Right from the very start! Top marks, & Well done! deerie (17

) 4:11 pm, Wed 17 Jun

2-pac? Is that you? 4:30 pm, Wed 17 Jun

swap for porche 911 turbo? timjon1 (27

) 4:11 pm, Wed 17 Jun

You know how I know your bluffing? You spelled porch wrong. 4:31 pm, Wed 17 Jun

How many watchers? samleigh (136

) 4:14 pm, Wed 17 Jun

Thirteen thousand, eight hundred and sixty seven...... goodness me. 4:33 pm, Wed 17 Jun

Does it have a white or a black agitator? bic60 (4

) 4:23 pm, Wed 17 Jun

You know what i believe it is white. White is a colour symbolistic of purity and angelic heavenly qualities which in this case I find a little miss-leading. It should be red/yellow/black stripes like a Coral snake. (not the similar but harmless Scarlet King snake) 4:55 pm, Wed 17 Jun

Hey the new picture you have added will that be made into a tee shirt? Love it jocelyn25 (114

) 4:24 pm, Wed 17 Jun

If you really want a t-shirt with a picture of a rusty old serial number on it. 4:56 pm, Wed 17 Jun

Hey my name’s Bryce I work for an electrical store. I’ve been working with appliances since 1979 and I love this story. I just wondered if it’s got a serial number? If it has, I may be able to tell you a bit more about its history, like where it came from and maybe even find out if it has always been like this and if there are any more like it. Cheers. caruba1 (163

) 4:26 pm, Wed 17 Jun

Hello Bryce. I missed the 70's I hear it was a blast. Many more people had mustaches than there are today. I tried to grow a mustache but it turns out I have the ginge gene. The machine does indeed have a serial number, it even had the original owners manual until I threw it out thinking I would never need it again. I have posted up the pic of the serial panel in the photos. This could be interesting. Like that time when my friend Eddie found out his mum and dad were cousins. 4:42 pm, Wed 17 Jun

Son? It's Mummy here. Why have you barricaded yourself in your bedroom for the last nine days? Why is the washing machine pining at the door? I am not sliding another pizza under the door for dinner 2nite, you are going to Icelandic dancing lessons no matter what you do to try to get out of it. mrs_whittaker (0

) 4:28 pm, Wed 17 Jun

I can tell you are a T-1000 imitating my mothers vocal patterns. I'm not going to fall for that. Not again anyway. 4:58 pm, Wed 17 Jun

Hi Mom mj2356 (55

) 4:32 pm, Wed 17 Jun

Hi Son. 4:58 pm, Wed 17 Jun

Seller Comment: Seller added 1 photo 4:49 pm, Wed 17 Jun

Regarding the recent picture; I was under the impression the dinosaurs in some sort of time vortex above the washing machine, not IN it - a detail I thought the bearded man got wrong. bucda397 (29

) 4:53 pm, Wed 17 Jun

The vortex is pretty hard to draw, it exists in an infinitely thin 2D plane so it is actually invisible to the naked eye side on. I tried drawing the vortex heaps of times front on but every time it looked like a flower. 5:02 pm, Wed 17 Jun

When's the 'Scary Washing Machine' Movie coming out, that's one for Peter jackson. shane_peebles (80

) 4:54 pm, Wed 17 Jun

The only condition is it has to have Natalie Portman in it. I'll try to negotiate some noody pashing scenes but I don't think she'll be up for it because she is dignified and proper. 5:04 pm, Wed 17 Jun

Ironically, you bought a regulator from a trader called Kevinator last year. He didn't sell you the bloody washing machine too did he? fima (16

) 4:57 pm, Wed 17 Jun

Fuel pressure regulator?, No I sold it to him, this was prior to getting the washing machine too so perhaps the Icelandic's have been planning this for a while. 5:05 pm, Wed 17 Jun

You are the man!!!!! Dont get eaten b4 you sell this beast! jaedelz (75

) 4:59 pm, Wed 17 Jun

Its ok I'm pretty familiar with the beast. I think the new owner will have to be introduced slowly though. I certainly wouldn't be rushing into it or they'll soon be rushing into the Jurassic period. 5:07 pm, Wed 17 Jun

ONLY 4 questions this instant. As a pharmacist I can see that the Trademe sensitive and sensible (but still aiming for world domination) human resource dept. are helping you control this viral pandemic of whiteware proportions, and do remove your old questions. This must help you greatly, but be wary of their prescribed medications. they are not doctors. I hope your worries about the Icelandic people will not affect your life and Karma. may the forks be with you,, and your family. bizsafe (110

) 5:02 pm, Wed 17 Jun

So its you who keeps sending me the forks! Can i ask why? And why so many? I don't get it. 5:09 pm, Wed 17 Jun

Why don't you start a website for your machine or just your own comedy and people can pay like 5 or 10 dollars to become members and read stories about your washing machine and other things. it would go off so well after all this publicity. or even your own chat forum that people pay to join. missy340 (1

) 5:12 pm, Wed 17 Jun

I bought a subscription to a magazine but the letterman keeps folding then in half to jam them through my mail slot and after that they never sit flat. They either need to make bigger letter slots or longer skinnier magazines. 5:22 pm, Wed 17 Jun

Is the picture of you holding onto the deep freeze with the washing machine on the left going to be put onto t-shirts. Thanks, also your a legend man. paddon321 (35

) 5:16 pm, Wed 17 Jun

But I haven't even coloured it in yet! 5:23 pm, Wed 17 Jun

How many watchers? hahaha khw1 (12

) 5:18 pm, Wed 17 Jun

Thirteen Thousand, Eight Hundred and Ninety Six 5:24 pm, Wed 17 Jun

its giving me nightmares already... southcoast1 (31

) 5:31 pm, Wed 17 Jun

And it will give you nightmares tomorrow too...its in your conscience, you will not escape it. 12:47 pm, Thu 18 Jun

I have a large mortgage, do you think it would suck that into the void if I bought it and placed it into my laundry??? ddall (82

) 5:34 pm, Wed 17 Jun

Yeah i cant see why not, if you can tie the mortgage up and get it in a bag and throw it at the vortex I'd say it'll probably go right in. 12:48 pm, Thu 18 Jun

www.youtube.com/lowintegra Yes John Cambell has a video in there, how is the noise compared to the boyracers in chch? Is it louder than a RX7? I want something that I can put in the back of my car powered by an invertor and cruise around and make the most noise possible. cheers lowintegra (173

) 5:35 pm, Wed 17 Jun

Thats not Campbell doing a burnout? I thought we had a deal? 12:48 pm, Thu 18 Jun

Hi i am having a surprise party for my sister and her husband at there house next Saturday night. I have a live band coming would this washing machine go well with a live band please. I have a mate travelling through your way may he pick it up as hes calling down to us Thanks for your time cheers ishitah (1098

) 5:36 pm, Wed 17 Jun

Yeah sweet, want me to pick anything up from the supermarket? 12:54 pm, Thu 18 Jun

It took me 22.24 sec to scroll down the page using 3 scroll wheels simultaneously. Hmmm. my laptop also has a touch scrollwheel, but I dont have enough hands though :( gnimnuy (28

) 5:36 pm, Wed 17 Jun

Toe-scrolling is the key 12:54 pm, Thu 18 Jun

hey got my undertaker.shark t-shirt today...fricking awesome!!! If you need any help with the Icelandics let me know...I have a few weapons against them... sgudmun (11

) 5:39 pm, Wed 17 Jun

I think maybe when they see the mark of the undertaker their hearts of ice will shatter anyway. 2:49 pm, Thu 18 Jun

I tried to experience something similar by pouring hot tea onto my ipod, yet to no avail. The ipod just died instead, though did make some weird fuzzing noises during it's last breath...is there another dimension hiding inside its shiny casing? I could really use a break somewhere different..... chicaletta (24

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Scary washing machine. No really, its terrifying!

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