PlayStation 5 – Battle-Tested, Humbling, And Ready For a New Home

Selling my beloved PS5, the machine responsible for many late-night gaming sessions… and many, MANY humbling defeats at the hands of 12-year-old gaming prodigies who apparently have nothing but time, reflexes of a hummingbird, and parents who let them stay up past midnight.

This console has seen things. I have seen things.

But it’s time for someone else to carry the torch — ideally someone with better skills and a stronger ego.

What You’re Getting: * PS5 Console – Used, loved, but in perfect working order * DualSense Controller – Also perfect, unlike my kill/death ratio * All the Cables you need to actually turn the thing on: * HDMI * Power cable * Controller charging cable * Headset charging cable * Gaming Headset – works perfectly… but full disclosure: * One ear cup is basically hanging on by a thread * Functionally fine, aesthetically tragic * Like a pirate ear-flap situation. Adds character.

Condition: * Used — obviously. * Everything works flawlessly (except my self-esteem). * Factory reset and ready for you to dominate the children who destroyed me.

Performance Summary: * Loads games instantly * Runs quietly * Graphics so sharp they make losing hurt even more * DualSense haptics for maximum immersion while being eliminated in the first 30 seconds

Why I’m Selling:

Because I’ve accepted my place in the gaming hierarchy — bottom tier. Also: life responsibilities, kids, work, and an ego that can’t take another “ez clap” message from someone born after 2014.