IH8PPL

Let’s be honest: People are the worst. They walk slow, they drive slower, and they somehow always end up in front of you at the lotto counter buying 14 scratchies and want a conversation while you just want the winning lotto ticket... This plate says what you’re already screaming internally — but with style.

Why This Plate Exists *Because people walk four-abreast in supermarket aisles *Because someone always wants to chat at the petrol pump *Because the right lane is full of cowards *Because humanity peaked at “tap to pay” and has been downhill since

Features *Tells the world to back off before they even get near your bumper *Perfect for anyone who’s ever considered moving to the forest *May or may not summon road demons (results vary) Scientifically proven to reduce unwanted small talk (*By me. In my head.)

Best Suited For *V8s, turbo bricks, or anything loud enough to drown out society *Drivers who have no interest in “chatting at the lights” *People who have considered faking their own death to avoid a social event *People who growl when someone parks too close *Drivers who have a favorite carpark specifically because no one else parks near it *Anyone who’s one more slow-merging Corolla away from snapping

Condition Cleaner than your search history.

Could be open to offers — but don’t insult me with $50 and a bag of chips. I hate people, not money. (If you lowball me, I will simply assume you are one of the people I hate)

Pickup Auckland. Preferably somewhere with minimal humans and maximum escape routes.